


A Single Golden Thread

by Kailanionthewing



Series: The Tapestry of Legends [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Childhood Trauma, F/M, eventually, friends to something more, seriously way far ahead, short people problems
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2020-05-15 19:35:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 70,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19302391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kailanionthewing/pseuds/Kailanionthewing
Summary: Something's coming.When a Spectre goes rogue, when Geth once more roam the civilized worlds killing at will, when an ancient evil once more enters the galaxy, bent on total annihilation, only one woman seems to be capable of bringing together those with the skills to stop him.How do people react, though, when they find that the 'Great Commander Shepard' might be a little...less...than they were expecting?





	1. Girl Scout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First meetings don't always go as smoothly as you would hope. Oh, the Normandy is perfection, streamlined and beautiful, but her pilot and crew are another matter.

"Wow" Shepard sighed in wonder at the sight before her. "Just...wow."

Honestly, when told she was going to be joining Captain Anderson as his XO for some top secret mission, she wasn't sure what to expect. Given their relationship....well, to say she had been shocked would have been an understatement, but then again most didn't realize how close they were, so maybe it shouldn’t have been such a surprise after all.

Tucking a wayward curl back, she walked down the dock and eyes glued in amazement on her new temporary home, the Normandy. Having served on and examined many ships, she could honestly say this one beat them all. 

Even perfectly still at dock, the ship's sleek lines made her already seem in flight, motion in every stroke. Stepping toward the airlock, Shepard paused and raising a deceptively delicate hand over its cool metal skin. A soft smile crossed her lips as her eyes drifted closed, just feeling. She could almost feel the metal breathe, the give and take of life in the gentle thrum under her fingers. Behind it, the shudder of impatience, anticipation, that tensing of muscles the moment before the gates opened as horses tensed for the leap. Falcons raised wings to the wind, waiting for the hood to lift and give them the sky. This girl was made to fly. She was waiting, ready, for her moment to truly shine. When that moment came, Shepard knew this ship would leap free of all binds and fly farther and faster than any other before her. She was made to soar and was just waiting for her chance. 

"She's a beauty, isn't she?" The gruff voice behind her made Shepard’s eyes flicker open as she turned, a smile still on her lips as she greeted her oldest friend and mentor. 

“You aren't kidding there, Anderson. This lady has more life in her steel bones than most people." Stepping back to truly see the whole line of her again, Shepard sighed. "She's the most beautiful things I've ever seen."

Laughing, he clapped her on the shoulder, hand heavy on her small frame.

"Just you wait. It gets even better on the inside. Come in and meet some of the actual crew before you start drooling over the ship."

"Too late!" Laughing, she hauled up her duffle and followed him into the airlock.

......

Joker was at his station, as usual, making sure everything checked out for the hundredth time. She was a new vessel, so they may not have worked out all of the kinks and it was his job to find them. Though considering how she flew, he smiled to himself at the memory of his small bit of revenge, there couldn't be very many issues in her inner workings to find. Something crossed the camera feed in the corner of his eye, drawing his gaze. A young red head, hair drifting on the exhales of steam from the ship as she cooled, a seemingly heavy bag slung over her shoulder, made her way down the dock as she gazed in amazement at his new baby. 

"Now what do we have here?" Chuckling, he swept his quick fingers over, flicking the feed onto his main monitor. His copilot glanced over at the sudden shift, craning to see what Joker was looking at.

"Got something, Joker?" The man’s dark eyes watched him curiously.

"Nah...nothing new Kaiden, just some kid trying to stow away. Here, take a look..." Waving his hand, he sent to same footage to Kaiden's screen. He squinted, leaning in closer to the image as his brows came together in confusion.

"Are you sure that's a kid?"

"Are you kidding? Look at the size of her!" Seeing the Captain come into the frame, Joker laughed. "Busted. Well, you weren't getting on this one anyway."

"I'm still not sure she's that young, Joker."

They watched together, Joker frowning in confusion as Kaiden grinned a small smile of victory, while Captain Anderson greeted the unknown girl like an old friend, walking with her out of the camera's view. Joker’s fingers flew across the commands, searching for a different view point, when the decontamination cycle hummed to life behind him.

"What the...."

Both of them turned as the Captain and his companion stepped through the airlock and onto the bridge. Joker quickly flicked off the feed, but not before Anderson spotted what they’d been watching with, a frown of disapproval flickering briefly across his face before he shook his head with a sigh. 

"Told you...." Kaiden whispered from out the corner of his mouth. Joker finally laid eyes on the young girl and realized he was right. She wasn't a kid after all, but possibly one of the shortest marines he had ever seen. Feeling mischievous, he pushed his cap back on his head as he greeted the Captain.

"Hey Anderson! Are we recruiting Girl Scouts now? I'm definitely not complaining. I wouldn't mind having a steady supply of cookies onboard anyhow." Kaiden hissed quietly next to him, but Joker already knew he'd gone too far as Anderson stiffened and drew himself up, eyes flashing as he glared down at him. _I am so dead_.

Surprisingly, it was the subject of his teasing herself that came to his rescue. Laying a delicate hand on Anderson's arm, she shook her head as he glanced down, eyes softening a bit. Dropping her bag to the floor, her eyes pinned him to his seat as she strode towards him, grabbing the back of his chair and looking him in the eye. _Oh, still dead, but what a nice way to go._ This close to her, Joker saw her eyes weren’t just blue, that was an overwhelming understatement. Those orbs were contained nebula, silvery blue to indigo, streaks of violet seeming to swirl in the light of the bridge. He almost forgot to breathe...right up until the moment those eyes crinkled with mirth, her hand swiped his hat straight from his head, tossing it behind her with a soft flump on the deck as the little sprite skipped back out of reach with a high laugh.

"Gee, Anderson, when did we start transporting livestock? Cause this one's an ass." 

He stared at her in shock. He almost couldn't remember the last time someone besides Chakwas not only took his biting jokes, but gave right back again in turn. Anderson started to laugh.

"It's not often someone renders him speechless, Shepard. I think he may have finally met his match." 

"Hmmmm..."Pinning him with her gaze, her red lips twitched in a small smirk. "We'll see."

A small gasp drew the woman’s eyes from him as he sagged in relief, and to the man in the copilot's seat, now staring at her wide eyed with surprise.

"Wait...SHEPARD? Like THE Shepard?"

With a sly grin, she twirled a hand with an elaborate bow.

"The very same."

"Seriously!" Joker was shocked again as the name finally sank in. "I thought you'd be taller!"

She stared at him for a moment until he felt his neck start to get warm, having realized what he'd said.

"Well, I thought Alliance pilots had a little more sense, but it looks like we're all disappointed today." She shrugged and heaved a dramatic sigh. The show made Kaiden and Anderson start laughing all over again. Anderson stepped up, tapping her on the shoulder. 

"Come on, let’s get you settled before we leave dock. I'll show you where you'll be."

"Bye boys!"

With a jaunty wave over her shoulder, she gracefully twisted down to loop her hand through the duffle’s handle, hauling it from the floor effortlessly as she followed Anderson off the bridge. Kaiden was still chuckling occasionally at their new XO's teasing.

"Shut up!" Joker’s cheeks flushed in anger, but Kaiden only laughed harder, to his further embarrassment. Grumbling under his breath, Joker finally turned back to his diagnostics, leaving his copilot to his mirth.

"Oh man! This trip just got even better." Kaiden glanced behind him, eyes following Shepard’s path as he slowly calmed, turning back to his own work with a sigh.

.....

Anderson chuckled as he led the way through the deserted CIC.

"I've never seen someone get that kind of reaction from him, Shepard."

"Oh that was nothing, just wait till he notices."

Looking at her in confusion, his grin widened even further as she twirled Joker's hat, as if from thin air, to settle snugly over her own short, red curls. 

"HA! You know, I don't think I've ever seen anyone part him from that hat. You might be causing trouble on this ship, Shepard. You always were a bit of a mess." He rubbed the top of her head fondly as she shoved at his hand with a groan even as she grinned.

"Eh, what's a frigate without a little bit of trouble."

Shaking his head at her antics, he changed the subject, pointing out some of the changes from the more traditional designs of the CIC. Listening as she examined her surroundings, she could see a lot of changes from the usual design, the biggest being the somewhat strange Captain's overlook. Thinking about it, she nodded to herself. It actually made a lot of sense. Even outside of battle situations, the Command Center of a ship could be quite busy, and if it was busy during downtime, in actual combat it was utter chaos. She would think having the Captain up above would give them an easier overview of the bigger picture and would make the Captain easier to keep track of by crew as well. 

_Hmmm...It could make the Captain seem less approachable, but honestly who felt comfortable approaching the one person who held their career in their hands._ She smirked at the thought. Not many would ever be comfortable approaching “The Boss”. 

Of course, right now the area was deserted. Most people were probably enjoying a short shore leave off ship before they left for who knows how long. Only one person other than themselves seemed to be here, working diligently on a console across the room. Looking up as they approached, the man smiled before saluting.

"Captain Anderson, brought us another odd one I see." He winked at her as they reached him. "He always does pick the best, but the best tend to be a bit eccentric."

"Ah, Shepard, meet Navigator Pressly."

She nodded, reaching to shake his hand. The man blinked in surprise, but recovered quickly. If not watching for the reaction, she may have missed it entirely.

"Shepard?...I'm sure we've all heard a lot about The Great Commander Shepard. Looking forward to working with you" His skin was warm and rough under her fingers as he grasped hers. Looking at him, he wasn't especially young, but as a Navigation Officer in the age of space travel, you wanted someone experienced and knowledgeable. 

"I'm not so great as all that, but the feeling is mutual." Shepard smiled "So, Navigation Officer huh?"

He chuckled "Yes Ma'am. It's my job to make sure the goofball up front has what he needs so he doesn't accidently drop us into a star mid FTL."

She rolled her eyes "Yeah...we've already met Joker. I'm hoping his humor gets better over time"

"Not really Ma'am. He may the best, but he's still sarcastic and often irritating. Depends on the receiver's sense of humor, I guess." Squinting at her hat, he commented "Isn't that his hat anyway."

"Not anymore" 

Pressly laughed "If you can get that from him, I'll be interested to see if there's anything you CAN'T do. But I don't want to take up too much of your time and I'm sure we'll see plenty of each other on the mission."

"That's sure true. Have fun with your system checks then." Nodding, Shepard followed Anderson further into the ship.

.....

Pressly watched them go for a second before turning back to his terminal. He would admit, he had been surprised at first, but he figured she wouldn't be here if she couldn't handle it. Plus, if even half of what he'd heard was true, Commander Shepard didn't mess around.

The terminal screen lit up with lines of code and system names as he returned to his work. He scrolled through, double checking that everything for the galaxy map display was accurate and up to date. 

This might be a more interesting mission than he’d thought.

.....

Having already toured the upper level, they headed down the stairs to the main living areas of the ship. _Hmmm. Are these stairs slightly taller than usual? Maybe an in-between so they're comfortable for humans and turians to both use?_

"That elevator leads to the Cargo bay, where your gear is already stored and waiting, and engineering."

"I don't suppose they've made elevators any faster in this one." 

Anderson rolled his eyes, exasperated "Of course not. We can make things that people 30 years ago wouldn't have been able to barely even dream of, but somehow scientists still can't make a faster elevator without messing with the ship's equilibrium." Shepard laughed at his expression.

"But without slow elevators, how would I ever learn all those pointless, annoying little things about my crew?"

He just sighed and shook his head "I'm sure you would find a way Shepard."

From there, Anderson could point out the med bay "Which I'm sure you'll need soon enough", sleeping pods, captain's cabin, and lockers. 

Anderson stepped to the side, taking a seat with two people at one of the tables as she approached the lockers. Seeing one with her name already on it, she pulled it open. She swung her duffle off her shoulder, but didn't even bother unpacking. Seeing that the locker was large enough, she maneuvered the unwieldy bag and shoved it in. There would be plenty of time to unpack properly before they shipped out. Neatness with her personal effects was something the military hadn’t succeeded in drilling into her, much to some commanding officers’ great distress. You wouldn’t find a speck of dust on her armor, or a bit of unchecked damage on her weapons, but her locker would still be messy and cluttered. Tucking it here and there so it wouldn't fall out at the first opportunity, she slammed the door and joined Anderson and his two companions. One was an older woman, her grey hair making her seem much older than the usual alliance soldier, and the other a young man who looked like he was just out of boot camp. He was practically bouncing in his seat with barely contained excitement as she joined their group.

Anderson looked amused by something, but introduced them "Shepard, meet our ship's doctor, Doctor Karin Chakwas, and Corporal Jenkins, who will be part of the ground team."

Jenkins eyes widened in surprise "WOAH! Wait, YOU'RE Commander Shepard! But I thought..." He suddenly snapped his jaw shut on the thought.

"Yes?" She said innocently "You thought...?"

"Nothing Ma'am" He looked down as his face started turning a very interesting shade of red.

_That never gets old. People better be glad I'm so easily amused, cause I just think it's funny and don't get all upset._

Chakwas set her cards facedown as she began to laugh, wiping a tear from her eye before smiling at the famous alliance hero now sitting across from her. 

"Oh, that was an even better reaction than I could have imagined. Thank you, Shepard."

"You don't seem too surprised by my...hmmm...let’s call it 'vertically challenged' status, doc." Shepard just looked at her, curious as to why this one person wasn't taken by surprise. The Doctor just gave a sly smile.

"I don't know if all ship medics are as diligent, but I happen to review each person's medical file as soon as they are posted to the ship and it's sent. I saw your height and weight and figured it might be a bit fun to see someone's reaction if they didn't know that the Great Commander Shepard was only five feet tall."

Shepard chuckled "I'll have to keep an eye on you, won't I? You're sneaky."

"Who, me? NEVER!" Chakwas had perfected the 'Totally Innocent' face, or at least it would have been perfect if they didn't already know better.

"WAIT! You knew already?" Jenkins couldn't have looked more embarrassed if he tried.

Anderson was grinning, amusement glowing in his eyes as they crinkled in mirth at the whole situation.

"You're a mess Karin."

"Oh, I know, but shhh...not many others have figured it out yet" She reached down to pick up her hand again, reviewing her cards. Jenkins reluctantly turned back to his cards as well "hmmmm...Do you have any two's?"

"Go Fish Doc."

"Damn!" She reached for the deck, pulling another card.

Shepard barked a laugh "You guys are playing Go Fish?" This was almost the last thing she would have expected.

"Well what do you expect?" Chakwas added the new card to her hand "We're on a still docked ship full of bored marines. Poker gets a bit old after a while, but most of the MEN aren't interested in playing what they consider to be kid's stuff. Helps to change it up a bit from time to time."

"And I seem to be the only one willing to play other things most the time." Jenkins sighed "At least this one, I don't have to be worried about getting cleaned out" Suddenly remembering who else was there, he winced "Not that we're actually gambling or anything, Sir"

"Relax Corporal, I don't care" Anderson really did look like he couldn't care less. The whole thing just seemed to strike him as ridiculously funny.

Karin glanced back at Shepard "Ah, and I see you've already met our pilot. I'm sad I missed that. If you managed to make off with his prized possession, it would have been amazing to see."

"Kaiden seemed to think it was funny" Shepard grinned and adjusted the bill of her new accessory before pausing thoughtfully "Hmmmm...I wonder if he's noticed it's missing yet."

Anderson barked a laugh "Now that would have been a sight to see. His face will be utterly priceless."

"You mean you managed to get it from him without him even noticing!" 

"Well, he noticed when I thumped it off his head, but if he noticed that I scooped it up as I left, I'm not sure." Tapping her chin, she shook her head with a smile "Nope, I'm pretty sure we would have heard about it if he noticed I was actually taking it with me." 

"Ah, now I'm doubly sorry that I missed it." 

"Think I can get dealt into the next hand?" Shepard liked this doctor. She was pretty cool.

"We're playing Uno next, if you want to join?"

"Sounds like fun" Shepard said with a smile.

Anderson got to his feet "Well Shepard, I don't think there are many more crew members on board at this stage. We still have a bit before we leave dock, so most of them are enjoying a last bit of shore leave. My room's over there if you need anything. Enjoy your game." He squeezed her shoulder as he left.

Shepard could already tell that she was probably going to love it here. 

.....

Having finished his own checks, Kaiden stood to leave, already thinking about going ashore for some real food for once. Pausing, he looked around Joker's chair, confused.

Joker glanced up from his own work with an exasperated sigh.

"What are you doing?"

Kaiden leaned down, peeking under the seat a little and scratching his head in bewilderment.

"Just...I could have sworn....Joker, where's your hat? I thought it was right here."

"What do you mean?! It's right...." Turning around to where it had landed, all Joker saw was an empty expanse of deck. "But..." He had planned to get it, but getting out of his chair was always a hassle with his bones being so fragile. It should have been right there. Thinking back, Shepard had whipped it from his head, tossing it back....near her own bag....that she had grabbed on her way out.

"But...." His eyes widened as he suddenly realized what must have happened.

"What the hell! That little minx STOLE MY HAT!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm attempting my first real, full length fanfiction. I absolutely welcome CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, in fact please do. I love writing and playing with this world, but I really want you guys to love reading it too so I LOVE OPINIONS AND ADVICE!❤


	2. Wait! Did he just...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So much for a simple shakedown run.

FINALLY!

Shepard could have shouted for joy. Finally, at long last, the Normandy was in motion.

Days meeting all of the crew as they arrived; helping to supervise the provisioning of the ship for their first run...Shepard frowned at the list of supplies still in her hand. It was an extremely extensive list considering this was a simple shakedown run. Even the destination was simply show. Nothing ever happened on Eden Prime worth any note. That was the whole point. Small, quiet....boring...the perfect human colony. _Ugh. I wouldn’t last five minutes before wanting to shoot or break something._ Pulling herself back to the odd requisitions, Shepard shook her head with a sigh. Something was wrong. Her gut instinct screamed it as her stomach twisted in knots. If this were a simple test run, they shouldn't need nearly so many supplies, ammunition, even so many crew. 

Then there was the spectre on board, further adding to her unease. Cocky bastard strutted onto her ship with so much attitude his head should have been stuck outside and hadn’t left her since. Oh, he didn’t say anything to her hardly, he just was always THERE. Unexpected motion in the peripheral, Nihlus; feeling of being watched, Nihlus; never a word, but EVERY SINGLE FREAKING TIME she turned around, he was there...watching with his beady, little eyes. She shuddered. Stalking was a quick way to freak anybody out, but the jerk didn't seem to care. She'd barely even heard of the Spectres and their role, but one of their elite was traveling on a short test mission and just happened to find the XO unbearably fascinating? Not likely.

Metal grating reverberated underfoot as she approached the back of Joker’s post, putting Nihlus and her feelings aside just in time for the jump. Looking past their pilot, she watched the stars as she waited. There! A glow leapt from the spinning relay as it grew until you would think for sure you were going to hit it. A streak of azure light leaping the void, latching onto the ship, a slight shudder, a miniscule lurch was the only sign from the inside as the stars streaked, blurred and realigned. The relay had just launched them hundreds of light years, unnoticed by all except those tensed and holding their breath for the change. She relaxed, letting out a breath that she couldn’t remember holding. It was mind boggling to think about every time she witnessed it. One minute you're in one place, then a second later you're light years away with barely a bump. It never got old. Examining the stars for a moment, she traced new constellations in her mind with a soft smile before shaking her head and tuning into what the ship gossip was up to now. _Pilots are almost always the worst gossips...or the best._

"Spectres are trouble and I don't like having him on board. Call me paranoid." _So she wasn’t the only one then?_

"What's the saying? You're not really paranoid if someone really is after you?" Shepard voice right behind him made Joker jump in his seat and glare over his shoulder at her. "And I SWEAR...If he pops up behind me without warning again, he's likely to get punched. Seems like every time I turn around, he's right there. Creepy stalker vibes, man." She rubbed the goose bumps raised on her arms from just thinking about him. Ever since Nihlus came onboard, she almost always felt eyes on her. It was more than a little unnerving.

Shaking his head, Joker started to turn back to his work only to do a double take to stare at her head. Realizing what he was looking at, Shepard winked, tipping her hat to him with a cheeky grin.

"Seriously, Shepard! Isn’t your head just a bit big for that? Maybe we can resize it to fit better, unless you’re going to return it.” Joker gave a malicious grin right back at her, but didn’t faze her in the least.

“Oh, I already fixed it. Had to take it in a little. Your overgrown melon was stretching the stitches on the poor thing.” She gave a sad sigh as Kaiden snorted, busting out laughing. “I’m afraid that it just wouldn’t fit you anymore. Besides, not many men are lucky enough to have a girl take off with their clothes after their very first meeting....you ok, you look like a fish out of water with your mouth flapping like that" Joker gaped for a moment before closing his jaw with an almost audible snap, mouth setting into a stubborn line. The comm squealed, Anderson interrupting any response Joker may have been able to make.

"See ya later guys, me and my hat have to go talk business with the captain" Spinning on her heel, ponytail bobbing behind her, Shepard skipped off the bridge and left him to his frustration.

....

Joker watched her leave again with HIS hat still on HER annoying head. He was going to get that hat back somehow, but how to manage it without breaking something? He’d have to be smart about it. Grumbling under his breath, he turned back to piloting his ship.

Kaiden laughed until tears streamed down his face, finally calming as he wiped them away, still chuckling a little under his breath at his amazing Commander, the only person he knew to leave Joker speechless.

.......

Reaching the comm room, the door hissed open softly to reveal ( _surprise, surprise_ ) a certain irritating turian stalker already waiting for her. She marched stiffly into the room, crossing her arms defensively as she stood across from him, when he shockingly actually spoke to her for once.

"Ah, good. You're here.” It’s too bad he was such a creep, because the subharmonics she COULD hear weaving under and through his spoken words sounded quite nice...unlike him. She leveled a glare as he continued. “That means I'll have a chance to talk to you before the Captain joins us"

"Oh?" She raised an eyebrow, as she held a hand to her chest. "Talk to me? Little, old me? You sure you don't want to just follow me around for a few more days? I may not quite be tired of it yet."

He let out a hum and ducked his head a little, embarrassment maybe. The sound was strangely soft, even musical, for such a pointy, jagged species.

"Hmmmm, yes, sorry about that. Part of my job on this mission is to....hmmm...observe you. I may have been more....diligent than really needed. Humanity's representative has been pushing for a Spectre in their ranks. Due to my...unique views on the idea, I was chosen to review the candidate. That I put your name forward for consideration also affected it." She looked him up and down doubtfully. After days spent with him creepily following her every move, every BREATH, this was not what she’d expected. She hadn’t been sure if she should write him off as...racist? Speciesist? Or just plain creepy, but this? 

"You? You recommended me...for Spectre? Why? Humans haven’t exactly gained the favor of turians at this point." She turned to look as she heard the hiss of the door opening, announcing Anderson’s entrance.

"You've told her then?" Anderson asked "Good."

"You knew about this, sir?" Shepard knew she shouldn't feel betrayed, but that didn't stop her. Even with her relationship with Anderson, there were some things he couldn't tell her. It came with the job.

"I knew." He sighed, rubbing his forehead. "I wanted to tell you, but well, you know" She nodded. "Humanity needs this Shepard and, personally, I think you're the best choice for the job. That being said, let’s look at this mission."Anderson continued, telling her of the Prothean beacon had been located on Eden Prime. 

“Seriously?! I guess I’ll have to rethink the teeny place. Nothing’s ever happened there in the past!” To find a beacon...heck, the Mars beacon had launched Humanity farther than they could have imagined. What would they be able to learn from another, especially after already having experience from the first? Half the three decades of study into the first one was probably spent floundering in the dark with completely alien tech. Of course, with Eden Prime so near the edge of civilized space, they would need to move it somewhere safer, which is where they came in.

"So, why a Spectre?" Shepard looked at Nihlus.

"As a recommended Spectre candidate, someone needed to observe and judge you in a mission type scenario. Since the Council also would want Spectre eyes on the moving of an important Prothean artifact, this seemed like the best..."

Joker interrupted over the comms, making them look up in surprise.

"Incoming transmission from Eden Prime. You'll...you'll want to see this, Sir."

Shepard eyebrows shot up. Joker sounded serious, voice grim even over the comm line, worried even. If that goofball sounded worried, something had gone very, VERY wrong.

"Send it through Joker."

The holographic display over the comm station lit and Shepard couldn’t believe her eyes. Static fizzed across the screen, but not nearly enough to more than slightly obscure the horrifying footage. Close explosions shook the earth, debris thrown to be heard rattling again the camera wielder, a soldier wearing armor then? Helmet cam...must be. They, she by the voice, ran for their life, attempting to protect others from what was obviously overwhelming odds for a backwater somewhat guarded world. Strange synthetics, like nothing she’d seen before, were attacking the colony and, hovering over it all, a monster. Shepard shivered as a deep, more felt than heard, thrum reverberated through the speakers. Something about that ship was...wrong. Everything was wrong. Her hands shook with rage as she clenched them, fighting back the urge to HIT somebody. A shakedown run?! This wasn't a simple test flight anymore! That looked like a war zone to her, and simple colonists, innocents living simple lives, had ended up in the crossfire. This would be beyond ugly and there was little she could do. For it to be a transmission, well it wasn’t live. Chances were the person wielding that camera and those she was protecting were already gone. A small colony wasn’t staffed with enough military for a full invasion, just simple pirates and the like.

She left the comm room with Anderson and Nihlus, jogging to the elevator. _Ugh! These things are still so slow!_ Finally, after several long minutes tapping her foot impatiently and listening to the hum of the mechanics, the door slid open to the cargo bay. Alenko and Jenkins were already suiting up in armor and checking their weapons. Nihlus didn't even need to since it seemed like turians in the military practically LIVED in their armor _Or maybe it’s just him_.

Jogging to her own armor locker, she palmed open the door, before stripping down and replacing her ship suit for her undersuit, locking pieces of her armor into place with clean snaps. At one point, when she was new to the military, she found this process awkward and humiliating, but any shyness was quickly drummed out of you in boot camp. All armor and weapons locked in place, she stretched and twisted, making sure all the pieces were in the proper places and slid over each other smoothly. The last thing you want is to realize you can't move fluidly in the middle of a fight. Pulling her hat off her head, she tossed it in the locker, replacing it with her tactical visor, crimson screen flickering to life over her right eye, read outs from her teammates already scrolling across the top as she moved to join the others in front of the cargo doors. Jenkins turned to greet her, but stopped with his mouth hanging open in surprise.

"Wow"

Turning to see what he was looking at, Kaiden eyes widened as he spotted her. That....was not regular Alliance armor and she was quite proud of it. Pure black, the armor was obviously of a much better quality than the usual stuff supplied to soldiers, but it was the design that caught the eye. A pure gold dragon roared across the chest, its neck and shoulders coming over Shepard's own, where razor sharp talons clung. The design continued on the back, before the dragon's spined tail twined back into his view at the waist, continuing down one leg of the armor to a wicked barbed tip.

"Whoa, Commander!" Kaiden looked shocked at the change. A set of armor and Shepard went quickly from cute and seemingly harmless to someone he would not want to be on the bad side of, a change she had fully been going for with the look. Most even forgot her height until she stood next to them. As she joined them at the door, she could just see Kaiden and Jenkins craning to see her back from the corner of her eye and smiled to herself. From that angle, she knew he would be able to see that the design did continue, showing partly spread bronze wings and wickedly clawed feet that looked to be gripping the armor plating.

"A gift to myself when I made N7 rank. I needed my own armor, so I had it made." She gave a wicked smile. "A bit of a reminder to people to not forget that I have talons, regardless of appearances."

Nihlus nodded in satisfaction, mandibles flickering softly with a thoughtful sounding hum.

"A very nice set for sure."

"Armor? Or talons?" She lips spread in a dark smile and he cocked his head to the side, meeting her eyes.

"I guess we'll see."

They all turned back to the door as Joker came over the intercom, announcing the approach to drop point one. _Wait, drop point one? As in more than one group?_ Jenkins must have had a similar thought.

"Nihlus, you're coming with us?" Shepard barely held back a smack to her forehead. _Duh. Of course he’s coming with us. What else would he be doing in front of the doors in full gear?_ Still, more than one drop point was not good news. It meant the teams would be too small and split where they couldn’t support each other.

"I work faster on my own." Nihlus shouted over the wind as the door opened above the drop point.

_Wait...I work faster on my own?! He isn't going to....and he did...idiot._ Nihlus jumped out of the cargo bay door, barely leaving time for the Normandy to slow down first.

"Moron is going to get himself killed and others with him!" Shepard shouted over the wind.

"Well he is a Spectre, Ma'am" Jenkins looked at her in confusion.

"We're going into a war zone with little information, no backup, and not a clue what's going on right now. Running off like that when you have other people you're working with and civilians in danger is just idiocy." Shaking her head at the hubris of prideful fools, she hoped she was wrong as she prepared for the next drop.


	3. Anything but STINKIN' ZOMBIES!

The Normandy screamed on approach to drop point two, slowing just long enough for the team to disembark. Boots hit the ground with dull thumps, throwing dust from the dry ground skyward.

"Alright" Shepard took a deep breath, drawing in the smell of grass and clean earth as she calmed herself for the task ahead. "Jenkins, you know best how this colony is laid out, so you are now my map. Which way from here to get down to the main dig site?" He glanced at their surroundings for a moment, considering. Shepard knew roughly where they were compared to the colony, but anything more specific she wasn’t sure. Hopefully a local would know more.

"The easiest is back this way" He pointed confidently away from the cliff, towards a stand of trees downhill from them. "Come on."

The comms crackled to life as they jogged after their guide, Nihlus reporting in from his position.

"This place was hit hard, Commander. Watch your back, there are enemies everywhere." Shepard rolled her eyes at the Spectre’s bull headed stubbornness. Hopefully he didn’t get himself in a deeper pit than he could get out of with that ego of his. 

Her train of thought derailed at their first sight of the natives here. They looked like blimps crossbred with jellyfish, and she desperately wanted to poke one. Gas bags, Jenkins called them. Floating serenely along the marshy ground, they seemed to ignore everything around, making no moves towards or away from the soldiers suddenly in their midst. Assured they were harmless, Shepard shrugged, ignoring them for now. At another time, she might have acted on that first impulse to touch one and see how it felt, what it did, but for now there were bigger worries. Bodies began to show up here and there, burned, bullet riddled, abandoned in the dirt like so much garbage. 

"What happened here?" Jenkins said, anguish clear in his voice. Shepard knew it had to be hard, seeing people that you may have known murdered for no known reason, but he shook it off well, gesturing further forwards as he called over his shoulder. "It's not far now, we're almost to the main dig" 

A high hum, possibly outside of Jenkins hearing, filled the air as he stepped around an outcropping of red stone. Shepard shouted a warning as she lunged to reach him, but was too late. The sharp sound of a weapon firing sent her down against the rock face, armor meeting stone with a sharp clack as he fell. Lunging towards him, she grabbed Jenkins’s leg, grunting as she yanked him into cover. Their shields and armor should have been strong enough to take at least a few shots from most weapons, but the strange projectiles the enemy used almost completely ignored Jenkins' shields, which only barely deflected a few, leaving the rest to completely shred through his armor almost instantly. Even as she dragged him into cover, Shepard knew it was too late. There was nothing to be done. Her visor confirmed it when his armor readouts suddenly flat lined and flickering from the screen. 

She felt Kaiden join her even as chips of stone rained down on them from the enemy fire, the nonstop sharp electrical sound making her think of common turrets, but these were either far more powerful or worked very differently. The gunfire finally wound down, probably for a short cool down period as she could still hear that high pitched whine. Whatever had killed Jenkins was still there. Peeking around the boulder, she saw three unusual floating devices. _Turrets it is, but what kind? They don’t look like anything I’ve seen before._ She pulled her head back before they could spot her. Motioning to Kaiden, she held up three fingers and indicated the angle. They would have to be careful with these enemies, their weapons seemed work differently than most, somehow. Her armor was heavier than Jenkins, but testing it’s durability against new weapons was not something she wished to try today. 

Staying low to the ground, Shepard slid out from cover, pulling her rifle up to open fire even as a change in pitch warned her that she’d been seen. Recoil jerked into her shoulder at the awkward angle as the three shot burst hit the first drone, dropping it with a squeal. The other two opened fire as she threw herself back into cover as Kaiden leapt up, hands glowing vibrant blue of biotics as he Threw the next one into a rock face with a crack and a shower of sparks. _That sounded painful._ As the last turned to shoot him, Shepard took it down with a well placed burst, visor confirming with the last puff of smoke and flame that none of them were going to be shooting anyone anytime soon.

"All clear."

Shepard knelt by Jenkins, but knew her previous readings had been correct. He was probably dead before he even realized what had happened. Standing, she laid a hand on Kaiden’s shoulder.

"We'll make sure he gets a proper burial, but we have to move."

He nodded reluctantly, standing with a heavy sigh even as she kept moving, already considering their next actions.

"Adjust your shields, we don't want this to happen again. We'll still have to be careful until we're sure how their weapons cut through his shields so fast, but it may still help" Shepard changed her own shield levels. They would drain their batteries faster, but would still last plenty long enough for the mission.

Weaving carefully up the wooded slope, they came across a couple more groups of turrets, taking care of them as well. She made sure that both she and Kaiden were staying in cover when they could as they removed each one. Nearing the top of the slope though, they heard nearby gunfire. Shepard cocked her head in confusion for a moment. No one was shooting at them, so that could mean only one thing. Realization dawned as she charged up the slope. Someone else was still alive.

Stumbling over the last few steps, Shepard came around the last corner to see an Alliance soldier in white armor pressed against one of the many rock outcroppings as two strange creatures fired on her. Though obviously synthetic, they had an almost organic look too. Shepard ran to the outcrop of stone next to hers, ceramic meeting stone with a jolt as she slid into cover. The woman looked at them in shock, but quickly recovered to help with the enemies that were still getting closer.

"Kaiden!"

The blue of biotics flowed up his arms like water before snapping forward. One of the strange creatures was caught in the blast, thrown backwards against the spire behind it with a crash as the metal bent from the sudden strain, bending and ultimately collapsing on it, pinning the synthetic to the ground. 

Focusing on the other, Shepard figured she might be wrong, but that flashlight looked awfully important. Ducking from cover, she pulled her rifle up and fired on the thing. It looked like one of the rounds was deflected, but the next two made it through, slamming its head back as the light died. The thing stumbled around for a few seconds until the other soldier opened fire and managed to kill it. _Can you even kill a synthetic? I guess you can cause enough damage to deactivate it, which is close enough._ With that one down, Shepard walked up to the other one and shot it point blank. There was a squeal of electronics and sparking as its lights flickered and died, movements stilling. With it in no condition to shoot anymore, Shepard knelt down, running hands over its exoskeleton as she took closer look. Definitely synthetic, but like no bot she'd ever seen before. They moved more fluidly than any drone or mech could. There was a metal frame, hydraulic inner workings as far as she could tell, but some of the connections...it looked like synthetic muscles, tendons, only one step from true organic framework. The only synthetic she could think of, that would match that information, was the Geth, but as far as she was aware they hadn't been seen in hundreds of years. _Perhaps they’ve decided to bring their long isolation to an abrupt and violent end...but why?._

The Alliance soldier approached behind her as she was wrapping up, sitting back on her heels to stare in bewilderment at the strange bot.

"Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams of the 212. Are you the...."

"Can you fight?" Shepard cut across her, already rocking to her feet, dusting her hands before reaching for her rifle once again.

"Wh..what?" Williams asked, stunned at the quick change.

"Can you fight?" She asked again rolling her eyes in exasperation at the woman. Honestly, they were in a warzone, not just relaxing at base."Are you injured? We're one down, and you don't seem to have backup right now. So, can you still fight?"

The woman nodded "Yes, ma'am."

"Good, less introductions, more movement. Do you know the way to the beacon dig site?"

"Sure, it's just at the end of this trench. The scientists are there, as long as the Geth haven't gotten to them too." A shadow crossed her features for a split second before her jaw clenched, banishing the thoughts for the moment. _Good. She has guts. She might just make it through this mess._

"Geth?" Kaiden seemed confused as he and Williams followed her at a quick pace down the notch in the landscape. "But the Geth haven't been seen in nearly 200 years."

Shepard scoffed, not even slowing the pace as she glanced back at Kaiden. Some women, including those on her crew, probably found him quite striking with the dark wavy hair and chocolate eyes, but the guy wasn’t the brightest bulb in the pack, was he? 

"They may not have been seen, but they're still there...and apparently now here as well. I reached the same conclusion. Unless someone's experimenting with AI again, the only thing those could be is Geth."

Ashley nodded in agreement.

"Do you know if there are any more of your unit left, Williams?" Shepard was fairly certain of the answer, but finding one had been a surprise. Some surprises could be quite nice. But William’s answer confirmed the worst.

"No. I think...I think I'm the last one. Those things came out of nowhere and took us by surprise." Shepard nodded. Something like that hurt, as she knew all too well. The chief was holding together well for now. Having something to fight always made it easier. It was the later downtime, when the silence closed in around you, that was the issue usually.

"I know that's hard, but at least you're still alive. Darn, we could have used some backup."

They didn't have to go very far to reach the dig site, but the trip was anything but pleasant. Bodies were scattered here and there, the acrid scent of smoke strong on the still air. There were few times when she regretted not wearing a helmet, but this situation was one of them. The geth didn't seem to care whether a person was soldier or colonist. They killed them all, leaving them to rot and burn.

Approaching the dig site, a geth stepped into the open and, seeing them, threw up what looked like a shield, but such an odd shape. Shepard and her team took cover, waiting for the barrage, but there seemed to be only two of them? _There's nobody left alive here. Why are they still here, some kind of rearguard or something? Do Geth worry about such things?_

It was obvious that the beacon wasn't here, but the geth still were for some reason. 

Their barriers stood up surprisingly well, but it didn't take too long, between biotics and firepower, to wear them down. 

"The beacon was right there! It must have been moved." Ashley darted past her, running carelessly into the ring of structures and looking frantically, pacing back and forth as if glaring at the earth hard enough would make the beacon magically reappear.

"By scientists or Geth?" Kaiden asked.

Shepard nodded. Which party moved it could make a huge difference in where it would be and how to get it back. They needed to know. Ashley considered for a moment, but there really wasn't any way to tell here.

"I don't know. There's a camp up the path. Maybe someone there knows, if anyone is still there."

At this point Nihlus finally checked in on the comms again, telling them of a spaceport where he would wait for them. Shepard sighed in relief. Finally, Nihlus might be showing a little sense. Having them run around separately like this wasn't smart and he wasn't really helping them by scouting since he wasn't giving them any useful information. Rubbing her forehead in disgust at stubborn men of any species, Shepard started up the ramp from the dig site.

Even before reaching the top of the hill, the wind turned towards them, blowing billowing, rank smoke over the rise. Even with the warning, knowing and seeing were completely different. The geth might as well have bombed the place. They may have, actually. Destroyed prefabs, burning containers and buildings, and badly mangled bodies, some of them on tall spikes covered the plain. 

"What are those things? I can't see a reason for it other than intimidation tactics, and the Geth didn't leave anybody to intimidate." Shepard started to step closer to look at one of the grim devices, but jumped back, raising her rifle as one of them moved, collapsing in on itself, lowering its grisly cargo to the base, where it immediately pried itself off the spike and started shuffling towards them with a hair raising moan. 

_What the HELL!?_

"What did the Geth do to them?!" Ashley sounded as horrified as Shepard felt as the former colonist seemed to be trying to get its bearings. 

"I don't know, but they don't look right. Be careful and keep your guard up."

No sooner had she said it, than the first of the "colonists" opened their maw wide on an unearthly, hair raising shriek, lunging towards them with insane speed. No human should be able to make that noise. They weren't human anymore! 

"Take them out!" She was already firing even as she gave the order. Running backwards away from the flailing monster, something slipped underfoot, dropping her to the ground with a jarring thump. The terrifying thing ran at her as she pulled the trigger until her gun overheated, beeping loudly in warning, as it finally dropped only feet away from where she had landed. A light showed in the edge of her visor as her rifle started cooling down, but was not yet ready to fire.

Ashley wasn't so lucky. Seeing the remains of someone she probably knew, she hesitated, allowing one of the creatures to get close enough to grab her, ripping her from the ground. With an otherworldly scream, it was enveloped in a blue corona as it let off some kind of blast, throwing Ashley backwards. 

"Kaiden!" With Ashley out of the way, but her rifle not yet cool, Kaiden had the best chance. He reached out with a biotic field, Throwing the monster away from Ashley just as Shepard's rifle finally cooled enough. Yanking it to her shoulder, she fired on the misshapen thing. Immediately changing targets, it ran at her, but she just held the trigger until it hit the ground, rifle hot against her hands and shrieking in warning again. These things were apparently tough and very hard to kill, if you could kill something that was already dead. Still...

“Zombies! Anything but STINKIN’ ZOMBIES!!” She stomped over to it and pulled her pistol from its holster, putting a few more rounds in its head just to be safe, before hesitantly crouching to examine the creature, hoping she was wrong, but knowing she wasn’t. 

It was definitely one of the colonists, or at least had been. There wasn’t much left of the person it had been now. Mostly synthetic, tattered grey skin peeked from underneath wires and cold metal. Light flashed in her eyes, a glint reflecting from the sun. Her hand trembled slightly as she reached, brushing aside wires and tubes to feel a smooth shape under the wires and slipping it free of the tubes on its neck. A silver locket reflected the setting sun, feeling cold even through her gauntlet as it fell open on a picture of a couple, woman’s blond hair a mess as she leaned her head against the shoulder of a beaming dark haired young man, both smiling at the camera. This thing had been a woman once. She shook, fingers clenching around it, the edge pressing through the thin undersuit fabric on her fingers. 

.....

Kaiden reached down, pulling Williams from the ground before approaching his kneeling Commander. He saw her begin to shake and, fearing tears for the tortured soul before her, reached for her shoulder. The movement must have caught her eye.

Her head jerked up, eyes burning with uncontrolled rage. His blood chilled, freezing him in place as effectively as a mouse under the eyes of the owl. She barely seemed human in that brief moment. He watched as she registered him with a slight flicker of her eyes, seeming to snap back to herself, fury receding slightly as she tugged, ripping something unseen from the dark, dead form to hang shining between clenched fingers. Rage still rolled through her voice as she finally spoke, eyes on the husk of a colonist at her feet.

“This....THING...was a woman once. They twisted her, tortured her, turned her against those who should have been able to protect her, and let her loose, forcing us to cut her down like a rabid animal.” Her voice growled with so much fury he could barely understand her words. He felt Williams take a step back and completely understood as he fought the urge to do the same. This was not the same Shepard. This was an almost primal, old anger,.....and deadly. Shepard’s eyes met his and the burning there made him step back anyway. “I will not let this pass. I cannot. The one who caused this will pay....I’ll make sure of it..” She looked down at the deformed mockery of a human being at her feet, remembered pain flickering, stoking the rage higher. 

“Some things are worse than death.”

....

Kaiden’s sudden flinch brought her back. Shepard felt the rage in her blood cool, no longer fast flowing lava, burning all in its path, but deep, slow magma, burning a slow, painful path through her veins as she brought the necklace to her armor, sliding it into a pocket in her breastplate before shaking her head. _Rage is not for battlefields. Rage makes you clumsy, makes you slow. Use the anger. Channel it on the proper path._ The warm voice of memory slipped in, helping her to breathe, pushing the anger into the void, better to harness, to pull out when useful, than to carry all the time.

Shepard turned from her shocked team, approaching the spikes to take a better look at the design. They looked completely different than the Geth. If she had to guess, they probably got the design from someone else, but as to how they worked? The last of the burning heat slipped from under her skin, allowing easy thought again, but she couldn’t make heads or tails of the ugly stuff.

"Heck man, I'm not an engineer. I have no idea how they did that. Freaking Dragon's Teeth is what they are and I don't like it" She said, running her hand over her hair in frustration.

"Dragon's Teeth?" Kaiden approached cautiously, looked confused by the reference, but watching her carefully.

"Greek mythology. Kill a dragon and plant its teeth and they grow into fight ready soldiers to throw at an enemy" Ashley looked at him in surprise "You didn't know that?"

Kaiden snorted "I don't think anyone but you two did....Ma'am” Shepard rolled her eyes at both of them.

"Move out. We need to keep going. Maybe we'll finally catch up to Nihlus before he gets himself killed"

Considering those weird colonist husk people, Shepard decided her shotgun would be a better option. She could handle having a harder time with enemies at a distance of it would avoid having another of those things get close. It was sad and horrifying to see the changes wrought in them, but there was no way to help them except through death, so it may as well be easier one. That anger at those forcing this on them simmered, making itself known as she yanked the shotgun from her back, expanding it to its full size with a clean, smooth motion, until everything snapped into place. She pulled it to her shoulder and lowered it, testing the weight. Shotguns were not her favorite weapon and hers was a lighter weight one to avoid almost getting knocked back by the recoil, but it still was a better close quarters weapon than her rifle. _Maybe I out to invest in a sword if those are going to pop up again._ She winced at the grisly image, but it probably wasn’t a bad idea. 

Jogging through the camp, she would be very surprised if there was anybody still alive here. Then again, she did see a couple of undamaged structures. It's possible somebody was hiding in one. Still, Nihlus was waiting. They had better catch up. 

The top of the rise gave them a view of the port he had mentioned, and of Nihlus himself. It was a long way, but Shepard could barely make out his red and black armor, though it was probably as dusty as their own. _Wait...who is that?_

"Williams, was there a turian on this colony?" She turned to Ashley in confusion.

"No, why?"

"Because we only brought one." Shepard turned back to look at the two turians below them, just in time to see Nihlus turn his back on the other....who raised a gun.

"Nihlus!"

Nihlus must have heard them, because he whipped his head around toward the sound, only to stare down the barrel of the pistol that was now in his face. Shepard gasped as she saw blue blood spray across the dock an instant before the distant echo reached them. The other turian turned to look at them, before walking down the docks towards what looked like a small transport station.

Though certain it was too late to save Nihlus, Shepard started running down the slope after the unknown turian, only to stop short, bringing her shotgun around as she heard the metallic screech of Dragon's Teeth lowering. She heard the moan and screech of the husks before she saw them. They swarmed around the edge of the rock face in front of them, right into her shotgun's range. Some of that roiling rage flowed out, keeping her steady, focused as she backtracked, carefully this time, as she pumped round after round into them, even the adjusted shotgun's recoil threatening to push her back on the uneven ground. _I will find who did this to you. You will not be forgotten._ She heard Ashley doing the same with her assault rifle, and one of the things was surrounded in a blue, crackling aura that flung it backwards into the stone, crushing it. _Note to self, biotics may be one of the best weapons against these._

The last colonist husk fell _I’m sorry._ , only to be replaced by even MORE Geth as they got closer to Nihlus. The things seemed to not want to get too close, keeping at a distance behind their shields as Shepard fired on them. Ducking behind a crate, Shepard quickly traded weapons back to the assault rifle that worked so well on them. _That freak is getting away and I'm stuck here. Why are the Geth helping him?!_

Finally, they reached Nihlus as the last geth squealed and fell, but she didn't even have to check him to know he was gone. You didn't miss at that kind of range.

"Commander! There's something behind the crates!"

Shepard and Kaiden whipped around to look where Ashley was aiming in time to see a man jump up from behind some cargo containers.

"Wait! Don't shoot!" The worker was panicked.

"Are you STUPID!? You don't sneak up on armed soldiers. You're lucky we're not the usual security guards most colonies hire. They're a bit more jumpy." Shepard lowered her rifle, rubbing her forehead in annoyance at panicked, stupid people. "If you were here, did you see anything about the one who shot the turian? We saw, but were too far to get details."

"Yeah, yeah, sure I saw it." The man seemed desperate to make himself seem useful. _Probably just wants to make sure he isn't going to be shot._

"You're friend seemed to know him, called him Saren. He seemed to trust him, but Saren shot him. Then he just got on the cargo tram and left"

Whoever this Saren guy was, Nihlus obviously knew him. His blind trust and inability to think ahead got him shot in the head. If he had waited for them, he might have still been alive. Shepard glanced down at the Spectre, his forehead plates severely damaged and caving around the wound, smooth lines of his markings obscured in places by the damage..... _Markings!_

"What did his markings look like? Did you see them? Might help us find him."

"Markings? Like the ones your friend has? I don't think he had any."

Okay, that was weird. Shepard didn't think she'd ever seen a turian without them. Maybe in one of the pirate or slaver groups she'd fought in the past, but not that she could remember. She wondered what that meant and how those markings were important to them. They all had them, but she'd never thought to ask.

"Where does that cargo train go? What's down there?" _What is Saren looking for here? The beacon? It seems the only thing worth much on the colony, but worth this?_ Shepard looked toward the rails.

"It just goes to the spaceport. We're just a small, farming colony, so there's usually nothing there. I think they moved the beacon there this morning. That creepy thing's been nothing but trouble, bringing that freaky ship and those monsters here." They had to catch up before Saren got away with all this destruction and the beacon.

Of course, Saren made sure it wouldn't be easy. He apparently left some friends behind. _How many of these things are here!?_ Thankfully, there were only a couple and they weren't too careful about watching what they were standing next to. The Geth threw up their strange hexagonal shields, but didn't shield the small explosive containers near them. A couple of well placed shots made the canisters explode, taking out the Geth hiding in front of them and the shield they were hiding behind. 

Shepard and her team walked the tram, passing the bodies of the synthetics on the ground. One of them still seemed to be moving a little, Shepard pulled her pistol and shot it point blank a few more times until another squeal of electronics convinced her it was finally dead. Moving to the front, Shepard pressed a large button on the console. _At least it's easy to use._ She wasn't as good at working electronics. Shooting things she could do, and do well. Working a tram, or figuring out how to hack a door, not so much.

Of course, it looked like she jinxed herself. They approached the station at the space dock in time to see a Geth finishing arming what looked like a GIANT BOMB! Kaiden started to glow next to her as he wrapped a field around the geth and Pulled on it, causing it to topple backwards onto the tracks, tram barely shuddering as it ran clean over it before slowing to a stop where it had been standing moments before. Shepard gave a small dark chuckle.

"Nice."

Kaiden blushed at the praise.

Jumping onto the dock, Shepard knelt to look over the device. There was a reason it looked like a giant bomb. She felt her heart start to race, pounding in her ears. It was a FREAKIN' GIANT BOMB!

_And now there are BOMBS! Hello! I am not bomb squad, thank you very much! These guys are really starting to make me mad._

"Crap! Kaiden, your file says you're good with electronics, right?" She hoped that her information had been correct.

"Yes..." He sounded a little hesitant, but honestly, any hacking ability was probably better than hers.

"Good, cause from the reading I'm getting off of this, there are three more of these and we only have five minutes, and I'm not so good at hacking. I'll work on this one, you and Williams go up and find the rest. Watch out, there are probably more Geth up top, so don't get shot!"

"Yes, Ma'am"

Kaiden and Ashley took off running up the ramp as Shepard started attempting to hack this one. It was going to be clumsy, but thankfully from the looks of what she was seeing, the Geth didn't think anyone would try to stop them. They hadn't even tried to make the devices hard to get into.

As she was still fumbling that one, she heard gunfire from above. Ashley came on the comms, breathing hard. 

"We've found the second device. Kaiden and I are staying behind cover while he works on disarming it. You were right about the Geth, but it's not many. We're still okay."

"Good, do what you can. It doesn't look like they were making this very hard, so I should be up in a second." Shepard ducked partway behind the bomb as a shot ricocheted and almost hit her. _Using an explosive as cover...the irony._ Putting the last command in, the device whirred down and the timer on the screen stopped. She ran up the ramp to find the next one

It wasn't hard to tell where Williams and Kaiden were. There were two geth focusing on a small corner surrounded by crates. _Makes sense to hide a bomb there. The less visible, the harder to find and disarm._ Pulling up her rifle, Shepard aimed at one of them, recoil kicking back against her shoulder as she squeezed the trigger. The attack caught one of the Geth by surprise and sending him over in a shower of sparks even as the other started to turn towards her, but Ashley was already pulling its attention back as she popped out of cover, shooting at it while Shepard ran for another corner of the dock. 

She noticed a couple of other areas like the one that Kaiden was in, so she ran for one of those, crossing a bridge. She ducked into the alcove just in time as another synthetic noticed her and opened fire. This time Kaiden came on the comm.

"That one's disarmed Commander, moving to the next area. It's opposite where you are."

"Don't worry about that Geth, Commander; I'll get it off you." Even as Ashley said it, Shepard heard gunfire from the opposite end of the dock where she was and the Geth stopped shooting at her, likely turning towards its new target. Shepard ignored it, just kneeling beside the new bomb. Thankfully, having done one, the second was easier, taking less than a minute to hack and disarm. Making sure the timer had stopped, Shepard pressed herself to the wall and peered around to check for Geth, just in time to see the last fall to Ashley's own weapon.

"Last one disarmed." Kaiden announced over the comm. Shepard checked her visor, and it did indeed show that all four were no longer counting down. She breathed a sigh of relief, leaning her forehead on the cool wall for a moment. That was a rush and not the good kind either.

Pushing off the wall, Shepard gave herself a small shake, armor clattering a little as it shifted in place, before jogging around the corner to join them. She met them above the ramp leading down to the loading area. 

"Good job guys, thanks for the help there Kaiden. Hacking really isn't my thing." Shepard laughed. Kaiden looked embarrassed at her acknowledgement. 

"It's not a problem Ma'am. You seemed to be doing fine to me."

Ashley grumbled under her breathe, rolling her eyes. Shepard held back a laugh. She was pretty sure she heard "suck up" somewhere in that. 

Starting down the ramp, Shepard was glad they had finally reached the end; she could see what could only be the beacon, sitting on the dock, waiting to be moved to a ship. _Aw man! Spoke too soon._ she thought as she heard the screech of lowering Dragon's Teeth. _Why!? Anything but more husks! How many did these monsters kill for their sick soldiers?_ It was a narrow walkway, so there wasn't a lot of room to maneuver, but that meant the same for husks. She almost couldn't miss as poured bullets into them, slowly backing towards her team as husks ran at them. The first fell, bleeding...green?...all over everything, but the next just ran over it, not even pausing. Everything that was human; empathy, fear, sorrow, love, any softer emotion had been completely eradicated. _No love amongst zombies huh?_ Her rifle was starting to heat up in her hands, she could feel it even through her gauntlets. There was only one more. She started to pace her shots, trying to give it just a second before firing again. Finally, the last one fell just before her weapon overheated. 

Of course, there had to be one Geth to watch the husks. Shepard ran down the rest of the walkway, onto the base level of the dock, slipping a little in the husk's...blood? _Do they even have blood anymore or is it something else?_ She pressed her back to a heavy crate, feeling Kaiden join her and seeing Ashley behind another nearby. Putting her shot gun away, she caught Ashley's eye and started to count. 

3..2...1....

The both swung around cover, squeezing the trigger, gun trying to pull up as they fired on the Geth. Between two, it was no contest. The Geth screamed and smoked as it fell to the onslaught.

Looking around and realizing that there were finally no more monsters in the way, Shepard also noticed there was no Saren either. They would find him later. At least they had the beacon.

"Why is it glowing? It wasn't doing anything like that before." Ashley gazed up at it in confusion.

Shepard looked from her, to the glowing, rippling aura surrounding the beacon, and back to her.

"It wasn't doing that before?"

Ashley shook her head quickly.

"No Ma'am before it just looked like a boring spike of metal. Maybe...maybe Saren or the Geth activated it somehow?"

"Possibly." Shepard looked at it again "Heck, probably even. But it's ours now, so others can figure out what it's doing, it's just our job to get it off world."

Turning, she radioed the Normandy, asking for the pickup. She was still telling Joker where to get them, when she heard Ashley shout.

Whipping around, ready for anything, she found she wasn't ready after all. The beacon's aura had lashed out, grabbing Kaiden and was dragging him towards it.

"Kaiden!"

Shepard launched herself at him, tackling him out of the field, but unable to avoid it herself. Her feet left the ground as she dangled before the spire, field holding her immobile in midair as she felt something stab into her brain. She heard a scream as images flooded her mind, barely registering it was her own voice as her brain was brutally ripped wide, pictures and emotions shoved in to fill her skull. Her eyes rolled back, spots encroaching on the edges of her vision as the onslaught continued, each image driving her a little further.

Finally, it stopped. She could hardly feel her own body as her vision grayed. Gravity took hold and she plummeted into darkness’ welcome embrace.


	4. I thought you'd be taller!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard failed her mission on Eden Prime because of one man...turian...whatever, and is left with scraps and a damaged message. To hunt him down, she must go to the very center of galactic civilization.

Kaiden sat in med bay watching over the Commander. For a moment on Eden Prime, he'd forgotten how small she was. Hand her an assault rifle and let her loose, size was no longer even noticeable. It was like someone crammed a Krogan into a tiny package, and she wasn't going to let anyone get hurt, not while she could stop it. 

Kaiden had a moment there, when the beacon first reached out to pull him in, of absolute panic. He couldn’t move, couldn’t fight, there wasn’t anything to fight, even his biotics failed him. For just a moment, he was done for, but this small, fierce woman had come out of nowhere, slight body having just enough force as she tackled him to shove him from the beam, trading her life for his. He’d leapt up, already reaching for her, but was forced to watch helplessly as Ashley pinned him, allowing the beacon to rip Shepard from the ground in his stead. He'd watched as the beacon yanked Shepard into the air like a ragdoll, holding her immobile as it pulsed, energy stronger and stronger until it was too much for even the alien device, overloading and destroying it. Shepard’s cry had torn a part of him as the pain it was causing became too much moments before an explosion ripped it apart and threw her across the dock. He wasn't sure if it was what the beacon must have done to her, the explosion itself, or her collision with the ground, but she was still unconscious hours later. He sighed, running his fingers through his hair again. It probably looked awful since he'd been doing it for a while. Worry twisted his gut, but if Doctor Chakwas said she would be alright and the machines kept beeping, surely they were right.

......

_Fire...screaming...the bitter tang of smoke on the wind...The galaxy burns around her as death rains from the skies. Nowhere to go....nowhere to hide..........run._

The images began to fade, but hovered in the back of her aching mind. A soft beeping from nearby replaced the screams of fear, the smell of antiseptic burning her nose instead of dense smoke... _Where am I?_

"I think she's waking up" The voice close beside her made her twitch, sudden movement causing her to groan at protesting muscles. Shepard opened her eyes, only to immediately close them against the stabbing light. Her head felt like something was imploding, sending stabbing pains into her eyes. If this is what it felt like to have a hangover, she was glad she didn't drink. How did she get here? Unfortunately, the visions didn't have answers for her, only horror and death.

"How are you feeling?" Shepard let out a rough chuckle at the question. 

"Does 'like an elcor is tap dancing in my skull' seem like a good response, cause it's exactly how I feel right now." She cautiously opened her eyes again, squinting against the glare to glance around her. Everything was blurry, white and grey smudges with little definition at first. She blinked rapidly as her vision began to clear. She was in med bay. How did she get here? How long had it been? She really couldn't guess. _And where did my armor go!?_

"Ummm Doc...When did I change clothes?" She plucked at the soft shirt she was wearing curiously. After years in the military, she wasn’t overly shy, but she still liked to be the one doing the changing...or at least be aware of it.

"Sorry Shepard, I couldn't get proper scans and treat you with your armor on and I figured you would be more comfortable in regular clothes than the alternative. I had it taken to cargo bay for you, though I'm afraid it hasn't been properly cleaned" 

The doctor looked up from her terminal, grabbing a data pad as she walked over. 

"Oh, thanks then. I'll take care of it when I get down there later. How long have I been out?"

"About fifteen hours, Commander. You had us a bit worried there for a while."

_Fifteen HOURS! I can't believe I was unconscious that long. Where are we? What happened?!_

Chakwas held out a hand, offering support if she required it, as Shepard swung her feet from the bed, feeling like dead weights at the end of her legs. Shepard shook her head, waving the worried woman back with a clumsy hand as she stood. That wasn't her best idea. Keeping a hand on the bed just in case, the movement had sent a stabbing pain through her skull and the world spun just a little, her stomach making its displeasure well known at the room’s sudden swirling motion. She stood still for a minute, allowing the room to once again settle into proper alignment, before removing her hand. 

"The beacon?" She asked cautiously.

"Destroyed.” Shepard flinched as Kaiden spoke from where he’d been sitting unnoticed behind her. “It exploded after it grabbed you. Sorry Shepard, it was my fault. I shouldn't have been so close."

Shepard grunted, waving a hand at him too as she dismissed the guilty sounding admission.

"The beacons are technology that no one understands completely. You had no way of knowing it would do that."

Kaiden nodded his head slowly in agreement, but obviously was still blaming himself.

"Still, I'm sorry you got hurt, Commander." He watched as she carefully stepped away from the bed, tensed as if waiting to rush over any moment. He obviously wanted to help, but she didn't need it.

Seeing that light in his dark eyes, Shepard nearly groaned in a different kind of agony. _Ugh, not another one._ She'd seen that expression before and couldn’t stand it. Hero worship was beyond annoying to deal with. They just ended up disappointed when they finally got it through their thick heads that she wasn't perfect, and they usually knew her less than people who didn't see her with the same light. Why get to know a person properly, when you think you already know everything about them? It was a pain, but one she could deal with later...maybe.

A flash of pain flared through her skull once again, bringing her mind back to the situation at hand. _Right, the beacon_ It being lost would not look good, and with no evidence of this “Saren” person, they didn’t have the first clue where to start. At least the geth and husk bodies would prove a full attack, but the turian was still an unknown. Then there were the visions or dreams or...well, whatever they were. It's no wonder her head hurt. From what she had seen, it seemed like that malfunctioning, ancient piece of junk had tried to cram who knows how much information into her head, but only after running it through a blender so it wouldn't be useful at all. Just death.....and lots of it. _Thanks so much Protheans. Really appreciate it._

The door hissed open, Anderson marching in, posture and expression in full Captain Mode. Glancing to both Kaiden and Chakwas in turn, they nodded, leaving the room so they could talk privately. As the door slid shut behind them, his tense demeanor relaxed, shoulders falling as he looked at her in relief. Ignoring any kind of protocol, Anderson stepped forward, wrapping an arm around her shoulder to pull her into his chest in a hug. 

Shepard stiffened, lack of forewarning causing her to tense for a second before she relaxed and returned the embrace. Laying her head on his chest, she breathed a sigh of relief and just accepted the support. Just that little act made her headache lessen significantly. 

"I thought we lost you there for a bit, Shepard. Are you okay?" He leaned back, raising her chin to meet her eyes with his own, concern showing through the mask he usually wore.

Her eyes began tear up, but she blinked it away. DARN IT, she was mad, not upset!

"This beyond stank Anderson. We had no idea what we were getting into and lost two men because of it. That's not including who knows how many colonists and soldiers on the ground. We didn't even get what we were there for. Stupid thing just grabbed me, stuffed my head full of crazy, and then exploded so we can't even prove what happened" She stepped back to pace restlessly as she ranted.

"The beacon showed you something? We need to tell the council this with our report" She was surprised for a moment at his words, but nodded reluctantly.

"The beacon exploded, so we have no proof, just the word of the person who failed their mission. The council won't listen to that, but if you think it will help, then we can tell them. For now, I just want out of here." Anderson nodded and she stepped towards the door, but paused, remembering something else.....or someone.

"Ashley Williams, sir?" She was a good soldier. Shepard hoped they hadn't left her behind.

"I believe she's made herself comfortable at the weapons station in the cargo bay. I offered her a place with us, considering her history and how she did with the situation on the ground."

"Good." Shepard was glad. Turning, she walked out of med bay, heading for the elevator. There were still a few hours before they got to the Citadel, so it might be a good time to actually talk to Williams. She hadn't really had much of a chance to talk to her while they were being shot at, so Shepard figured she would take some time to meet properly now.

"Commander! How long have you been up?" Ashley jumped to attention from the weapons bench where she was making herself at home.

"At ease, and only a few minutes. There wasn't much time for a proper introduction with Geth trying their best to shoot us, so I figured I would take a few minutes to meet our newest crew member. Plus, I wouldn't figure many besides me would get the Dragon's Teeth reference, so I wanted to meet the one who did."

Ashley chuckled " I guess that's true enough Ma'am. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams formerly of the 212, though I guess I'm the only one left now." Her face fell thinking about her former squad mates. Shepard reached out, hesitating for a moment before allowing her hand to grip William’s shoulder. She always tried to leave the option to reject such support in case it was unwanted, but the woman accepted it with a small twitch of the corner of her mouth, not a smile, but a start at least.

"I know how that feels, to lose your whole squad. If you ever need to talk, I'm available. I'm Commander Shepard"

"Wait...THE Commander Shepard? I know I heard Alenko call you Shepard, but....I thought you'd be taller" Ashley's eyes widened and she clapped a hand over her mouth as she realized what she had said.

"And I thought you'd be smarter" Shepard sighed, rolling her eyes. If she had a credit for every time she had this conversation. "Yes, I'm THAT Commander Shepard and I'm exactly the size I'm supposed to be, thank you very much"

"Sorry Commander" She muttered as her face turned bright red.

"It's okay, you may just want to make sure your brain doesn't run in neutral all the time"

They chatted for a little bit, everything from talking about Ashley's sisters to favorite books and movies. Shepard couldn't really speak much on family. It always was hard for her to wrap her head around the idea of having brothers or sisters, having not had any herself. That was probably best though. They still seemed to have a lot in common though.....when she wasn't just blurting whatever came into her head anyway. She was surprised to learn that Ashley liked classic literature. She mostly just liked the ancient mythology, but those two intersected frequently enough.

"So that's how you knew the Dragon's Teeth reference." Shepard was quite pleased with this discovery. Ashley chuckled.

"Yup, I like a lot of the old stories and poems. My dad was a big poetry nut and I came to love it too. I branched out a bit more and read a lot of the old stories too."

"Can't say I really got into the poetry as much. Quite a bit of it never made much sense to me, though" She thought for a moment, trying to remember. "Ah, The Rime of the Ancient Mariner! It's pretty dark, even ghoulish, but I liked it for some reason. Mostly though, I like the old myths and legends. Especially the monsters." Ashley laughed at that.

"Yeah, I noticed" 

Shepard cocked her head in confusion, making Ashley laugh harder.

"Your armor, Shepard!" Shepard laughed with Ashley at herself. Of course Ashley had noticed that, Shepard did make it very visible. 

"That makes sense. Yeah, I chose the dragon for myself. It's my favorite, though I do love a lot of those old creatures."

She checked the time. They didn't have long before they would be arriving at the Citadel. Excusing herself from Ashley for a moment, she turned towards the armor storage. Opening hers, she sighed. 

"Something wrong, Commander?" Ashley came over to her.

"Well, not really." Shepard pulled out her heavy armor. "In my rush to get out of med bay, I had already forgotten that my heavy armor hadn't been polished and inspected properly." 

"Your armor? We can get it taken care of, but why do you need it?" Ashley looked confused.

Shepard dug into the bottom of her locker, pulling out her light armor. It wasn't the fancy custom set she preferred, but it was definitely better than nothing.

"Well, the way I figure, Nihlus knew his attacker, right?"

Ashley looked confused. "Yeah, so?"

"So, Nihlus is a Spectre." Shepard paused, looking sad for a moment. "Was...was a Spectre." Taking a breath, she shook her head before continuing to explain.

"As a Spectre, he's not going to be the kind to turn his back on just anyone. We're talking a close friend or family member. This guy was either another Spectre, or someone Nihlus was close to often. Since Spectres work directly with the Council, I figure there's a good chance that whoever this guy is, he's often on the Citadel. So, I am not going without arms and armor." Looking at Ashley, Shepard saw understanding dawn. "We know he saw us, at least at a distance, and I would rather be overly cautious than not enough."

Changing into her undersuit, Shepard reached for the first piece and began the process, each ceramic plate hooking into place easily. She pulled out her visor and hooked it on, but didn't activate the screen. Walking to where Ashley still stood, she started searching through the weapons, not immediately spotting hers. 

"Oh! I think you're looking for these." Ashley pointed to the firearms she had been working on just before Shepard came down. Sure enough, they were hers. Picking up her Assault rifle, Shepard looked it over before looking at Ashley.

"You cleaned them?" She asked in surprise.

"Of course. They were dropped off here after your armor was put up. Sorry, I didn't know it wasn't cleaned either" 

"That's alright. I prefer to do my own armor anyway. Thanks for taking care of these though" Checking the guns, Shepard could see she had done an excellent job. Clipping the rifle over her shoulder, she grabbed her pistol as well, sliding it into its holster on her thigh. 

"We're supposed to be getting to the Citadel soon and I've heard the view coming in is spectacular. Want to join me?" Shepard was already turning back to the elevator. She had lost track of time and really didn't want to miss her first look at the center of known galactic civilization. Ashley had to jog to catch up as Shepard called the elevator down.

"Uh yeah! Sure"

Stepping out in the mess hall, Shepard waved to Chakwas as she and Ashley headed up the stairs. Reaching the CIC, she watched Ashley's reaction. She was in awe of the whole thing, trying not to be too obvious of a tourist, peeking at everything as they passed.

"First ship posting?" Shepard was surprised. Most Alliance soldiers had ship posts on a regular basis.

"Yes Ma'am. I've been on ships before, of course, but never actually posted as crew. Plus, I've never seen one like this one." Ashley looked over her shoulder at the raised Captain's platform and the elaborate Galaxy map.

"The Normandy's special. She's a prototype, a hybrid Turian and Human design, picking the best of both and blending them into one." 

Ashley flinched, a look of almost disgust crossing her face before vanishing. If Shepard had been looking the other way, she would have missed it completely.

"Is that a problem?" She'd never seen that reaction to the project.

"No, Ma'am. I just don't trust Turians."

Shepard scoffed. 

"Don't trust Turians? That's like saying "I don't trust men" or "I don't like chicken". You can't possibly think all Turians are bad, they're just people. There are good ones, bad ones, and everything in between, just like with humans. Besides, just look at them. They look like dinosaurs evolved armor instead of feathers. They're so cool!"

"I don't know about that Ma'am, but everybody's different." Ashley didn't sound even close to convinced.

Shepard shook her head at her stubbornness.

"Well, where we're going will have a lot of alien races. Maybe we'll have a chance to talk to a few and change your mind." 

Kaiden caught their voices as they stepped up the last few feet, giving a respectful nod before returning to the console before him. Not that he was needed with Joker on the job, but it never hurt to have an extra pair of hands with relay travel, she figured. She’d seen Joker’s files. Considering his disease, he must be a hell of a pilot for even top brass to call him such. The man in question didn't even glance up from his screen readouts as they came onto the bridge, just called greeting over his shoulder as he gave his full attention to the transfer.

"You're just in time Commander. We're about to come into the Citadel. See those tax dollars at work."

Shepard and Ash approached the bridge, watching through the windows expectantly as the last relay grabbed the Normandy, flinging them through the vast voids between systems. The Serpent Nebula unfurled before their eyes as the relay deposited them on the other side with barely a bump. Shepard stared in amazement at the wonder before them. 

The swirling of purple and pink gas and dust was magnificent in itself, lit from within by the birth of young stars, but as it parted, it dramatically unveiled its hidden treasure, giving Shepard her first view of the center of the known galaxy. The Citadel threw its five arms wide as they slowly spun, drawing streams of stardust in their wake while starlight gleamed on their surfaces, winking as the arms moved gracefully through space. Streams of small lights flowed along each arm, traffic she guessed. From here, you couldn't see the vehicles themselves, just the small lights.

"It looks like someone sculpted a giant flower out of metal and turned it into space station" Shepard loved the shape of it and the starlight streaming through it was absolutely beautiful. She did have to wonder though "Hey, do you think they'll have to move it as the stars grow and form their own systems?...Or will its weight and motion prevent a system from forming properly at all?" She continued to study the magnificent shape, before the silence made itself known. Glancing around at their amused expressions, she was confused.

"What?"

"You are really strange. You know that right, Commander?" Kaiden was holding back laughter, but Ashley actually looked thoughtful, seeming to consider the question before answering.

"Actually, those are pretty interesting questions...now I'm curious, too. I wonder if anyone has looked into it and who we would ask."

Joker leaned to look around his chair "OK...that's a few too many deep thinkers in my space. We may have to toss one of you out the airlock." Seeing his face for the first time since coming onto the bridge, Shepard did a double take, irritation quickly replacing the wonder she’d felt a minute ago.

"Hey!" She shouted in indignation as he just smiled "You little sneak thief! You went through my stuff while I was UNCONSCIOUS IN MEDBAY?!"

Joker adjusted his hat, pulling it down snug on his head with a grin. "Finders keepers, Shep."

"As if! If you weren't driving right now, I'd smack you." While she couldn't believe he was such a little sneak, she was actually quite impressed. She’d never seen him from his chair, so she figured his disease made it hard to get around, but he still had the guts to steal from a marine. _Cheeky little devil._ Faced with people stronger than him, he’d relied on sneakiness and smarts to get the job done. Joker just turned back to his controls, guiding the Normandy to the correct docking bay.

"Pulling into dock now Shepard, don't you have somewhere to be soon?" 

"We're not done with this. I'll be getting that back."

Just then Anderson came up behind them "Ah good, you're all here already. Alenko, Williams, Shepard, I need you to come with me."

Shepard glared at the back of Joker's head as she followed Anderson onto the docks, watching as he adjusted his hat again while making last checks. The airlock door closed, blocking him from view. Impressed or not, the cheeky little snot had declared war.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, if you haven't noticed (lol) I'm a huge fan of myths and legends, especially about monsters, and yes Rime of the Ancient Mariner was one of the few things I actually enjoyed reading in school. Don't ask me why, maybe I just like some of the darker stuffs, because Beowulf was pretty awesome too.
> 
> "Water, water, every where,  
> And all the boards did shrink;  
> Water, water, every where,  
> Nor any drop to drink."
> 
> Have any constructive criticism or advice? I'd love to hear it. I'm having fun, but I want you to have fun too. I can't fix a problem if I don't know there is one. 
> 
> 👍Thanks!


	5. First impressions are important...ish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arriving on the citadel, they quickly learn that Saren is going to be next to impossible to take down. Now they have to bring in the *shudders* POLITICIANS. Ugh.

_So much to SEE!_

Shepard wanted to dance with glee as they left C-sec for the Presidium proper. Wanted to....but contained herself with effort as she tried to avoid looking TOO much like a tourist. She'd seen other races before of course, but mainly from a distance or in combat, not in just an everyday type setting...well, except for Nihlus, but he was a jerk. He didn’t deserve a shot to the face, but he wasn’t liked either. Even excluding the people, there was the Presidium itself to marvel at. This was definitely not like any station she'd been on. No narrow hallways to make you claustrophobic, no airlock doors to constantly remind you of how far out you were, just huge, wide open spaces, large enough to give the impression of an open air park, distant ceiling far enough to allow traffic to speed pass overhead, cars made small with the distance. With a deep breath, she took in scents of green growing things, fresh, clean water, even flowers without a hint of recycled air staleness to be found. She sighed with pleasure, a soft smile on her lips even as she kept pace with Anderson ahead of her. It was amazing. 

Of course, there would always be something to break that mask of professionalism she was trying so hard to wear. As they reached the Embassy, a sight reached her that brought her to a full stop in surprise. _What the HECK is that?!_ The almost arachnid-like creature didn’t look like any race she’d ever seen, or even heard of. It didn't look like a sentient race at all actually, more animal-like than intelligent. Round body, almost centaur like shape, green smooth skin.....

"Not right now Shepard" Anderson didn't even have to look at her. He knew her curious nature far too well. She looked at it longingly for a moment, but obeyed, leaving the strange thing for another time. 

Kaiden was looking between her and Anderson, confusion obvious on his face at their interaction. 

"Exactly how well do you know the Captain?"

"Oh, I've known Anderson for years now. He knows me a bit too well I think."

Kaiden looked to the Captain and back to her, raising an eyebrow. Ashley saw the look on his face and smacked him on the back of the head, much to Shepard’s amusement. Bout time somebody thumped him.

"OW!" He rubbed his head, glaring at her, but Ash just rolled her eyes, exasperated.

"Not like that you idiot."

Shepard shook her head at their antics, chuckling to herself before explaining.

"Anderson is probably the closest thing to a real father figure I've ever had. He's known me since I was young."

Both looked a bit stunned by the idea.

"HA!" Anderson laughed, grabbing Shepard around the neck, mussing her hair "Found this one on the streets. You were a bit like taming a wild animal" Shepard jerked out of his grip with a shove, but was smiling as she skipping out of reach.

"He's not kidding either." She looked back at them. “I was so skittish back then that I was more likely to bite than shake hands.” She bared her teeth with a soft growl, laughing with Anderson at their shared history. 

"You were an orphan Shepard?" Ashley seemed saddened by the idea. Shepard's smile faded as she considered for a moment.

"Of sorts.” She felt her earlier grin slip as she remembered, before she forced it back into place, though with more difficulty this time. “Anyway, it's not really something I talk about too much."

They were both a bit confused by her answer, but didn't press further. It obviously wasn't something she liked to talk about. Kaiden opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by muffled shouting from the human embassy, the first thing to truly break the peace of this shining world. Anderson didn’t hesitate, just strode into the room. Shepard met her team’s eyes, looking from one to the other before shrugging and following her mentor in. Shepard was met with the sight of what must be the human ambassador yelling at three aliens over the comm. A Turian, Salarian, and Asari watched the ambassador rant and pace, looking down their noses at him with disdain. 

_Attitude problem much? What’s their issue?_

"The Council would help if Saren and the Geth attacked a TURIAN colony! We demand ACTION!!" He continued pacing, gesturing wildly as he shouted at the three in front of him in rage.

The turian huffed in disgust, glaring at the smaller man before him from under markings that looked.....shockingly familiar. _Nihlus had those same markings! Or darn close to it!_

"You don't get to make demands of the Council, Ambassador."

So this was the Council? That would explain some of the attitude problem. For all their differences of race, they seemed remarkably similar as they looked at the humans before them condescendingly, as though they were barely worth their notice. The Asari Councillor at least hid it better, but the Turian practically reeked of sheer hatred and disgust. Shepard knew they had a whole galaxy to run, but did they treat every non-council race like this? For that matter, there were so many races in the galaxy, so why were only three represented?

The Asari councillor waved her colleague down, shaking her head slightly, before answering the Ambassador.

"Humanity knows the risks Ambassador. Those territories are dangerous. We cannot step in every time something goes wrong in what is a known problem sector. C-Sec is investigating your claims into Saren. That's enough for now. The rest can wait until the official meeting. Good day."

She disconnected, their images flickering as they faded, leaving bare pad behind.

Shepard was impressed. Although yelling at the bosses wouldn't look good, at least he seemed to be fighting their case. Then the man turned to them and suddenly it was hard to tell the difference between him and the council as he wrinkled his nose in disgust at the soldiers in his office.

"Captain Anderson,” He sneered. Shepard was suddenly reminded of an old movie where someone had a similar tone with that name. She struggled to keep her lips from twitching, holding in a sudden urge to snort at the image. “I see you couldn't resist dragging half your crew through my office." He didn't even look back at them, just at Anderson, and still with that superior sneer on his face. 

_Yup, I change my mind, this guy is horrible._

"Just the team from Eden Prime, in case you had any questions, Ambassador Udina." Anderson stood at attention, but a small tic revealed just how much he disliked this man.

"I HAVE the reports. I trust they're accurate?" 

_Why that little weasel?!_ Shepard held herself back by sheer force of will as fury flared. Questioning Anderson's honesty in his reports! If he weren't so important, Shepard would have hit him, but that wouldn't help anybody.

"Saren is the Council's top operative. They're not happy about him being called a traitor." With this, Udina finally looked at Shepard. She really hoped his face stuck like that. He looked like he had just smelled something really rank. She was SO done with this jerk.

"Whether they're happy about it or not, it's the truth! Saren needs to be stopped!" He could question it all he wanted, but Shepard would fight him every step if that was the path he decided to take. _So, Saren IS a Spectre...called it!_ She shared a glance with Ashley, who just rolled her eyes back at her.

"Settle down Commander. You've already probably messed up your candidacy for the Spectres with the loss of the beacon and Nihlus. You were supposed to prove your worth, not fail completely." _Argh! Why that little! If he weren't so necessary I'd throw him off the balcony!_ She took a breath to avoid doing something very stupid, but tempting regardless. Udina didn't even care about all the colonists who had been killed, the losses to her team, or even the loss of the beacon. All he cared about was whether or not he got his pet Spectre. Disgusting. Even Anderson had enough, stepping forward.

"That's Saren's fault, not hers!" 

Udina just puffed himself up _Pffft...Pufferfish_ and yelled right back.

"Then you better hope C-Sec can PROVE it!" Pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation, as though he was surrounded by imbeciles, Udina took a breath before beckoning Anderson to follow him as he stormed past them. "Come with me Anderson. We need to discuss some things before the meeting." As if just remembering they were there, he added with a sneer "Meet us at the tower. I'll send you the time and make sure you have clearance"

With that, they both left the office, leaving Shepard and her team staring after them, dumbfounded at the nerve of the man. Ashley shook her head.

"And that's why I hate politicians." Shepard nodded in agreement.

"I'll agree with you on that one." At least they weren't needed immediately. Since the Council was busy, they probably had some time before their appointment. Anderson had given them free rein until time for their chance with the Galaxy's representatives. _Might as well have a look around for a bit._

"Where are you going Commander?" Kaiden and Ash were close behind her as she left the office.

"Anywhere I want." Looking over her shoulder, she saw them both following her and shook her head "You don't have to come with me. I wanted to have a bit of a look around before our meeting. This place is huge, full of so many people, and I remember that strange little critter downstairs that I couldn't get a good look at before" 

Starting down the hall, a strangely flat, toneless voice drifted from the opposite end, bringing her to a stop as she glanced back. Peeking around the office door, a volus and two elcor were talking. _Oh COOL!_ She'd heard of their races, even seen a few, but never had a chance to actually talk to them before. Still, it looked like they might be busy now. One of the Elcor did seem a bit more agitated than the other. Most were very still and slow moving, but this one seemed almost twitchy in comparison. Regretful, but figuring that she could try again later, Shepard started to back out only to freeze as one of them spoke up, asking if she needed anything. His speech was flat, strange and he announced his emotion?..No, tone, he announced his tone before each statement. That was interesting.

“Ksssht...Your embassy is down the hall, in the BIG office, human....Ksssht” Okay then....the volus ambassador obviously had some issues with her kind. He wouldn’t be the first, but the elcor still sounded friendly. Shepard immediately chose to ignore him for his.... friendlier coworker.

"Sorry,” She smiled in a way she hoped was noticeably friendly to his species. “I heard voices as I was leaving and was curious who else was down here, but I didn't mean to interrupt"

"Polite response, oh no, we were just finishing. You aren't intruding." She noticed a slight movement from the other one present and figured this was not what they had wanted to hear at all

"I am curious about a few things already.” She moved closer as she spoke, trying to be somewhat discrete while examining the strange being. Their heavy, blocky shape and grey skin brought elephants to mind. “Would it be impolite if I ask you some questions? I don’t want to be rude.”

The elcor gladly agreed, even their monotone voice seeming interested in the human that had invaded their office. Their volus partner? Not so much.

"Why do you bother Calyn... ksssht..., she doesn't honestly care" The volus spoke up, scolding him.

Even without being able to see his face, the volus sounded just like the council, looking down his nose _Ha, as much as he can since he's even shorter than ME!_ at the disgusting humans. Shepard wondered if he had personally been hurt by humans, or if it was just racism, a hatred for her based off of what others said and thought simply because of what she was. _Not every hatred makes sense....HA! MOST hatreds don’t make sense._ Still, at least she had a name now. 

“Anyway...”She rolled her eyes slightly as she turned back to Calyn. “Why do you announce your tone or mood like that? Isn’t it frustrating sometimes.”

“Resignedly, it is when you first leave the home world. Most other races are not able to tell by our voices alone.”

“How do you tell with your own race?” She had a suspicion. Apparently their worlds were extremely high gravity from what she knew, so usual methods of expression like moving hands or even large changes in tone would be overly taxing, wasting energy. Nature hates taxing, wasteful methods when shaping creatures, sentient and not, so they probably found a work-around. Calyn was excited to explain how they used pheromones and micro expressions to show mood, which was of course useless to other races. Still....

“Hmmmm....um...Not to seem rude, but is it easy to....to lie? To another race I mean. Say you’re happy to see them when you actually hate their guts? That sort of thing?” Din spluttered, the snick of his breather accelerating for a moment as he raged behind his suit mask, but Calyn took no offence at all.

“Amused, to another race, we could easily lie if we chose, but it is very frowned upon. Thoughtful, likely any of our race who caught another doing it would immediately comment. I have personally heard of one such who was shunned by friends for lying about such.”

“Calyn!” Din sounded outraged. “Ksssht ...She just called your race liars!...ksssht... Are you not going to stand up to her?”

“Exasperated, really Din? She asked a well thought out and honest question. Pleased, not many care enough about our race to even think of such things.”

Talking to Calyn was fascinating as Shepard thought of other questions to ask. It was hard to imagine living on a world with FOUR TIMES the gravity of earth. She knew it was high gravity, but....dang. Living on the Citadel must feel like you're about to float away. Listening to their history, she tried to imagine the sight of one of their migrations, but had trouble picturing it. The very thought of hundreds or more of their people slowly marching across flat, wide plains from one city to the next was incredible. To think many on the home world still did it, though mainly out of habit, rather than necessity by now. She tried to talk to the din more, but he wasn't really having it. Any answers he gave were short and almost rude. She tried not to take it too personally as it was obvious he disliked all humans. Still, having taken up enough of their time, she said her goodbyes, promising Calyn to visit at a later time as she turned to leave, only to find her teammates peeking around the door like a couple of children.

“Really guys?” She shook her head with a chuckle as they followed her towards the entrance, giving the impression of ducklings...ducklings in full armor anyway. “You know you don’t have to.....” The sentence trailed off as they reached that odd little bug out front, still hard at work, doing.....whatever it was doing? Leaning down, she looked into its eyes, but it didn’t seem to be looking at anything, just staring into space blankly. She would have thought it was just zoned out, but it was still diligently working away with those little fingers and waving a hand in front of it didn’t even make it blink.

"Please do not disturb the keepers."

Shepard glanced at the VI and then back to the critter. _Keeper? What do they keep? The Citadel I guess._ Well, now she wanted to mess with it that much more. Pulling off her glove, she laid a hand on its neck, petting the surprisingly cool and rubbery skin. 

"Shepard, I don't think you're supposed to do that." Kaiden looked a bit nervous.

"Can't learn if you don't test limits, and she told me not to." There was a mischievous look in her eye when she met his gaze "That's practically daring me to do it" 

She hated when people just expected blind obedience. If there was a reason, then great, she had no problems, but just tell her to not do something just because? Nope, that didn't usually go well.

It felt a bit like touching a frog all silky, but slightly damp too. The air was dry, so maybe some kind of coating they excreted to keep them damp? Her skin didn’t itch or burn, so it wasn’t for predator protection. A shiver ran under her fingers. _Oops, it didn't like that. Sorry fella._ Pulling her hand back and replacing her glove, she watched it continue working for another moment before turning to look at the view of the Presidium before them. Movement behind her made her blink as she turned to see Kaiden and Ash still watching, both seemingly amused.

"You guys are still here? You don't have to stick with me you know."

They looked at each other and back to her.

"I'm just curious what you're going to do next." Kaiden grinned. Ashley, however, was a bit more serious in her explanation.

"You said it yourself, Commander. Saren is regularly on the Citadel. It doesn't seem like a good idea for us to all go off on our own." Shepard blinked, surprised by the thoughtfulness of her answer.

"That's actually very true. Good thinking Ash." Ashley looked at her in amusement.

"Ash, Commander?"

"Oh, sorry. I seem to always end up calling everyone by first name at least, and often a short nickname. That's okay isn't it. I don't have to." Ash just shook her head.

"It's fine."

"Shepard?" Kaiden looked a bit nervous

"Yeah?"

"What do we call you?" She just looked at him for a moment 

"Shepard. Commander if you want to be all official, but I prefer Shepard." She understood why he asked, but still.

"Just Shepard, Ma'am? No first name?" Ashley elbowed him. He jumped back, rubbing his side. Shepard just rolled her eyes.

"Yes, I have a first name. No, I don't use it. I have my reasons, but I go by Shepard. It's what I prefer." Still rubbing his side, Kaiden nodded.

"Yes, Ma'am."

"And stop calling me Ma'am!" She wasn’t that old!

"Sorry, Ma'a....Shepard."

"Anything you guys want to look at?" Ashley and Kaiden shook their heads.

"We're just going with you, Ma'...Shepard."

Shepard nodded and walked towards the first path. Leisurely strolling along whichever path caught her eye, they wandered for some time. This place was beautiful. All graceful bridges, pretty lakes, tiny hidden gardens, and sunlight. How all this could fit on a space station, she didn't know. It must be incredibly complex. And the people! Everywhere she looked, there were other races. Turians and asari in armor marking them as Citadel Security patrolled, glaring suspiciously at the armed humans, a strange sight in this more exclusive area. An elcor plodded past, brushing them out of the way on the narrow bridge, grumbling to themselves about their work troubles. Other tourists of every race littered the area gazing in amazement at the sights. Shops filled with wonders from all over the galaxy. A Hanar on one corner seemed to be preaching about something called The Enkindlers. _I wonder what Hanar religion is like._

_This place is AWESOME!_

....

Kaiden watched her as they roamed the Presidium grounds. Was this even the same woman? Comparing her to the warrior who gunned down husks and geth alike, you wouldn't think so. How can one person be so terrifying in battle, but be so innocently curious of everything outside of it? He really wasn't sure, but loved the smile on her face as she nodded to a passing turian and examined a sculpture out on the lake. That one made his head hurt a little, but she seemed to like it.

Ashley, on the other hand, saw something completely different. ALIENS. Everywhere she looked, there were more aliens. When an Elcor pushed past them on a narrow path, she got as far away as she could. When a turian or asari watched them with curiosity, some with even outright suspicion, she glared until they looked away or were out of sight. She flinched as they passed a Hanar spouting nonsense to anyone within hearing distance. Where were the normal people? Why were there so few humans here? Ugh.

....

"I can't tell the aliens from the animals."

Shepard imagined you could practically hear the screech of tires as she jerked to a stop so fast the Ash practically ran her over, even at the sedate pace they’d been walking.

No. This was not going to be overlooked or allowed. It was rude and insulting to pretty much everybody in the galaxy. Putting a hand over her face, Shepard groaned and shook her head in disgust, thinking for a moment before she spoke. 

"You know what Ash, sometimes I can't tell you from a chattering monkey."

"WHAT?" Ashley sounded stunned, her face likely already flushed in anger.

Shepard spun, looking her in the eye "Stings a bit, doesn't it. Why should these so called "Aliens" like it any more than you do? Just look at them. Even the most bizarre is amazing and unique. Did you know Hanar communicate with each other through bioluminescence rather than words and can secrete natural toxins from their skin? Don't let one grab you. They can't throw you around, but they can knock you out for a couple hours at least. Elcor may be slow moving, but can easily live on planets with gravity that would crush a human to a pancake. Quarians may look odd....Actually I don't know if anyone really knows with the masks, but they're some of the best engineers in the galaxy. Asari are blue and have head tentacles, but live ten times longer than humans and have better biotic control in their little fingers than most humans could even dream. I can't even think of much wrong with Turians. They look awesome, can hear better than us, are faster than us, and have the strongest military in the galaxy. Every race is unique and fascinating, and they are all people!" By the end, she was out of breath, drawing air in to continue berating the clueless, shocked marine, when her omnitool pinged, cutting her off. They were expected with the Council shortly "Time to go meet the politicians. Hopefully it will go a bit better this time." She walked towards Citadel Tower, leaving Ash with her mouth hanging in shock, behind her.

At least it would be easy to find where they were going this time. The Council made sure the tower was very visible.

....

They stepped out of the elevator to get their first glimpse of the Council Chambers. It was lovely, with what looked like cherry trees, fountains, and, she sighed, LOTS of stairs. _Yay._ She rolled her eyes before starting up the first flight. Anderson was waiting to meet them, but they were stopped before a couple steps up.

"Excuse me...you can't have those in here."

Turning, they saw a turian in C-sec armor near the entrance. He huffed in annoyance and gestured to them again.

"Your weapons. You can't have them in here." He repeated, waving to the weapons attached to their armor. “You can leave them with me to be picked up as you leave, but you can't have them before the Council"

 _Dang._ Shepard didn't like giving her weapons to anyone, but looking to Anderson, he nodded and motioned for her to go ahead. She and her team approached him, Kaiden and Ash pulling their pistols. Shepard removed her assault rifle and pistol, making sure that the safeties were on so they couldn’t accidently fire on the overburdened guard. The poor guy must have only seen her larger rifle, because he seemed quite uncomfortable trying to juggle four firearms at once. Even though turians might be better in quite a few ways, they still only had two hands. She chuckled at the sight of him nervously trying to safely position all of them as she turned to leave.

Anderson coughed, hiding a knowing smile behind his hand.

"Shepard, ALL of your weapons." Looking to him again, he rolled his eyes at her, gesturing to back to the uncomfortable turian before heading up the stairs to meet Udina.

Groaning, she turned back and bent down to reach her boots, pulling a pair of black handled blades from the hidden sheaths in her armor and handing them to him as well. He had to do some careful positioning, but was just able to manage it. Nodding his head to them, he turned and walked away, hopefully to store them for their return. Turning to leave, she saw Kaiden's expression.

"WHAT?!" He quickly looked away, trying to hide a laugh.

"Nothing!"

She joined them on the stairs, grumbling. _I feel naked._ She hated being unarmed for any reason. 

Approaching the next landing, Shepard hesitated as shouting drifted towards them from above. There was a pair of turians, C-sec again by the look of them, arguing in the middle of the stairs. She really wasn't sure she wanted to be unarmed and between two angry turians. Those talons looked like they could be nasty, not that they should come to that.

"Saren's hiding something. I need more time. Stall them."

_Saren!? He's after Saren too? Why?_

Yelling at your boss never really helped anything much, but it was interesting how determined he was to take down a guy who most seemed to believe was the best of their race. Maybe she would have an unexpected ally here. 

"Your case is over Garrus." The other Turian hissed at his insubordination, before turning his back on him. "Get back to headquarters. Surely you have other things you could be doing." 

He brushed past them with a snort of disgust, leaving all of them at the top of the stairs. The one he had called Garrus was looking at them, but with mild surprise, rather than the usual aloof attitude they had seen so much today. 

....

Garrus turned to watch Pallin leave only to see his boss push past the Alliance soldiers right behind them. Alliance soldiers? In the Council chambers? There's only one reason why Alliance soldiers would be here. These three must have been the ones to be trying to take down Saren. He knew a human female, Commander Shepard, was supposed to be leading them though he knew little about her. Only what had been in the news in the past. Must be tough to survive such a thresher maw attack, not many could. Of the three, two appeared female, and one was small and wearing light armor. Looking to the other, taller woman, he greeted her.

"Commander Shepard?" Garrus asked. The woman’s eyes widened before she shook her head slightly, trying to discreetly gesture toward the woman in front. She could not be serious. He wasn't sure if he had ever seen a smaller woman. She was over a foot shorter than him, almost two!

.... 

Shepard watched, exasperated as the turian tried to wrap his head around it. _Every time._ It was a good thing she was so easily entertained, cause otherwise this would always go a lot worse for the other people. Instead, she was mainly just amused by the extremely confused look on his face. _Yup, you just stepped right in it dude. Now you need to pull yourself out again, and it's always hilariously awkward._

"But you're so..."

"Amazing, gorgeous, absolutely awesome?" Shepard was having fun with this one. He got so much more flustered than most people did. He still just stared at her in disbelief. "This has really thrown you off, hasn't it?" She said with a laugh. 

Raising his chin a little, he gave a slight hum while flashing a little of the pale underside of his jaw, mandibles fluttering in what she figured was a display of extreme embarrassment and maybe even submission? There was even a faint blue tinge just barely visible on the skin around the underside that he now revealed, but the low light made it hard to tell. Hmmm, part of the fun with other races, there's a whole new body language to learn. It would be nice to know turians could blush, it just didn't seem quite as obvious as for humans. Oh, this was fun.

"S.s...so sorry, Commander." He managed to stammer.

"It's ok, I am awfully short and it seems to be odd for people to see me in my position. Thankfully, my job involves a lot, but high shelves don’t seem to be a problem I run into much. You do have me at a disadvantage though. You know who I am, but I don't know who you are."

With that, the poor guy seemed to get his feet back under him as he stood at attention, arms behind his back with a more respectful nod.

"Garrus Vakarian. I am,” His mandibles twitched once as he continued “or rather was, the officer in charge of the case against Saren. Not that it came to anything. As a Spectre, everything he does is classified. I couldn't find any evidence. Still, I've taken up enough of your time. You don't want to keep the council waiting."

Shepard patted him on the arm as she walked past, the other two trailing behind her.

.....

Garrus watched as she walked up the steps until the trees blocked her from view. The he smacked himself in the forehead with a groan. _Stupid, so stupid! She probably thinks I'm an idiot!_ How was he to know that the famous Commander Shepard was so small?! He knew she would be here though. He sighed. Should have done some more research, then maybe he wouldn't have made such a fool of himself.  
So much for good first impressions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shep has an extremely curious nature, as I'm sure you can tell, and heaven forbid if someone puts up a Do Not Touch sign with no reason. 
> 
> POKE


	6. A Krogan, a Turian, and a Human get in a cab.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yay....politicians. woohoo. But they aren't really helpful at all. Thanks guys. Still, Shepard finds a couple of friends on the way, so it's not all a bust.

Shepard topped the last stair to find Anderson waiting impatiently, the meeting already begun. _They started without us! Figures._ She controlled the impulse to roll her eyes in exasperation...barely... hearing the Council’s response as they joined the puffed up human ambassador.

"We cannot find any evidence that Saren was involved in any way." The Asari Councillor imperiously declared from their podium. Shepard discretely glanced towards the traitor himself. _They are looking at him, right?!_

Saren had apparently managed to pull himself away from whatever mad plot he was running to attend the meeting over comm. _At least he doesn't seem to be on the Citadel._ He didn't look much like most turians she had ever seen. The dock worker had remembered correctly. Saren didn't have any of the usual markings so inherent to their race. Also, there was a lot more metal and wires visible on him than any organic being should ever have. She couldn't see what possible purpose there could be for most of it, but the Council continued to deny any involvement with the Geth despite him appearing to be more than half synthetic himself.

"The investigation was unable to uncover anything to support your accusations of treason" The Turian councillor seemed to like them even less than the other two. At that statement though, even Ambassador Udina had had enough. 

"He was witnessed!" Udina shouted, trying to get them to acknowledge even that simple fact. The Salarian Councillor just sniffed, obviously disgusted with the apparent simpletons facing them.

"Ah yes,” He sneered, mouth twisting as his eyes narrowed at them. “by a traumatized dock worker and your own crew, who not only failed the mission, but readily admit that they were too far to be able to identify anything other than the species of this mystery murderer." He shook his head as he casually dismissed their testimonies with barely a flick of his narrow fingers.

"I resent these accusations. Nihlus was not only a fellow Spectre, but friend." Saren was really laying it on, but the Council nodded, practically doe eyed as they absorbed every word.

"That just means you could take him by surprise!" Anderson yelled in rage, but if anything, Saren’s posture looked even more smug than before.

"Again, Anderson?” He leaned back on his rear foot, casually looking down on them as though they were no threat at all, simply a minor nuisance. “And this time you've brought friends. Your little pet Commander must be learning well from your example. Fail your mission and falsely accuse me. Typical. What can you expect....from a human." He didn't even try to hide the pure hatred for them in his dual tones. It rang loud throughout the chamber. "You humans need to learn your place. You're not ready to join the Council; you're not even ready to join the Spectres."

"That's not his decision!" The Ambassador was enraged that Saren would even make such a statement. Even the Asari councillor waved Saren off, giving him a disapproving look at his misstep.

"The Ambassador is correct and that is not the purpose of this meeting." 

"Purpose?” Saren turned that sneer even on the Council, but they appeared not to recognize his disdain for even them, so secure in their absolute reign. “What purpose? There's no purpose to this meeting other than to waste everyone's time." 

The meeting droned on for a few more minutes, but Shepard could easily see where this would end, much to her quiet disgust. The Council was eating up every lie that Saren handed out and turning down any evidence they put forward, which wasn't much honestly. Anderson did bring up her vision, but Shepard knew that wouldn't do any good. It was more evidence against the Geth than against Saren himself, even IF the Council believed it. Saren just used it as another way to make them look bad, and of course the Turian councillor went right along with him, nodding like a good little sycophant.

"Do you have anything else to add?" The Salarian councillor was looking to her in question, but she just shook her head. Without concrete, undeniable evidence, there would be no swaying them.  
Looking to each other, the Turian and Salarian councillor both shook their heads. The Asari stepped forward with their decision, but everyone there already knew what it was.

"Ambassador, without evidence, your petition to have Saren disbarred from the Spectres is denied." 

"I'm glad to see there is still justice in the galaxy." Of course the smug Turian had to have the last word before disconnecting. His image shimmered and disappeared as they stepped off the platform and walked down the stairs, defeated.

Udina immediately turned on Anderson like a rabid dog, snarling accusations before they had even gone ten feet.

"It was a mistake bringing you into the hearing. They might have listened to us if it weren't for your history with him." Shepard was done with this pompous jerk, stepping in space and glaring up at him, jabbing the weasel in the chest with an armored finger as he backed down.

"Anderson is not at fault! Anyone with eyes in their head can see they wouldn't have listened no matter who we brought!" She continued to stare down the ambassador, infuriated at the audacity as she waved back towards where the Council had been standing. "He's too deep in with the Council. You would have practically needed a video of him killing Nihlus, and even that might have been refuted by the Turian councillor. Anderson's history didn't have anything to do with it." 

"Regardless," Udina sneered down at her before turning back to Anderson "I'm still removing you from the case. Your past will negate anything we might be able to find." _The jerk!_

"You can't do that!"

"Yes, I can, and did." He just glared down his nose at her. "Right now, we need to find a way to get irrefutable evidence. Something even the Council can't ignore." Shepard rolled her eyes.

"Well it's not like he's taking selfies with his new Geth friends and leaving them lying where everyone can find them." She lowered her head in thought for a moment. There had to be a way to catch him with his greedy, evil talons in the cookie jar.

"Commander," Kaiden chimed in after a moment, cutting across and derailing her train of thought. "what about that Garrus guy? He might have something." 

Considering it, Garrus did seem like the best shot she could think of, and he had sounded like he might be getting close to something. Udina looked thoughtful, but the only advice he could give was to meet an old, very drunk contact of his. Anderson didn't like the idea, and honestly neither did Shepard. He could only suggest one other person though. Barla Von in the financial district. Supposedly the guy was an agent for the Shadow Broker, a famous information dealer. 

Shepard sighed, it looked like she would just have to fix it herself. Barla Von sounded shady too, but not as bad as Harkin. _Shadow Broker dealer it is._ She headed for the elevator, Kaiden and Ashley following behind. 

They paused before leaving to pick up their weapons, the C-sec officer huffing as he handed them over. Holstering her firearms and sliding her knives back into place, she stepped into the elevator and waited impatiently as it slowly slid down towards the main level. All the advanced technology available, but the elevators were still slower than mud? 

"So, ummmm Commander?"

Shepard almost sighed. _Elevator small talk. Fun_

"Yeah?" Although it was a good way to learn more about her crew, she stank at small talk.

"So, I notice you're not like most soldier types. Why did you join the Alliance?" Kaiden and Ashley both looked curious, though apparently he was the only one with the guts to ask.

"What, cause I'm way more awesome?"

He looked nervous as Ashley snorted, attempting to hide a smile. She wanted to see if he would just come out and say it. She's short, slender, a look not common among military women, but he couldn't just say she was short without really putting his foot in it.

"Well....yeah, I guess that too, but..."

She decided to save him some agony. "Yes, I'm small. Not hugely small, but most definitely smaller than is usual. And there are many reasons why I joined. The simplest and shortest is curiosity. There's a lot out here and I want to see it. The Alliance was willing to help me do so."

The elevator doors opened, letting them out onto the main floor. Checking with a nearby Avina, Shepard led the way across the gleaming lake that ran the center of the Presidium.

"Just curiosity, Ma'am?" It was Ashley who asked this time.

"No, there were a bunch of reasons, that's just the least complicated one." She was not about to go into her whole story while walking across the Presidium. At least the view was nice. She paused to look over the bridge at the water below, hands gripping the cool, metal rail. _I wonder if they have fish or water plants. If they do, how do they choose which planets to get them from?_ "Now I'm just curious what the more complicated reasons were." Ashley laughed, joining her at the rail, but tensed and looked over her shoulder as a turian walked past them, focused on the data pad in his talons. "Mine's easy. Almost everyone in my family joins. Parents, grandparents, going back generations."

"Huh...as a biotic, there aren't a lot of choices for me. Most people are still nervous around us, or worse." There was a bit of bitterness hidden there, Shepard thought, but she wasn’t about to tell her whole story, so why should he?

Looking up at the traffic overhead, Shepard noticed there was even a breeze, some escaped hair ruffled just a little as it moved past her face. How on earth did they do all of this?

"Come one. It's just around the corner now."

Kaiden had paused, looking at a statue on the other side. It looked like a mass relay. Shepard had examined this one earlier, liking the lines of the relays that people used every day, recreated in smaller scale to be admired, but now noticed Kaiden’s apparent unease as he looked up at it. 

"Does this one feel weird to anyone else?"

Ashley looked at him strangely "Nope, I think it's just you LT."

Passing them again, Shepard took the last turn into a small alcove that was apparently this Barla Von's office and was greeted by a volus, this must be the man... _or volus I guess_...himself. It felt different being the tall one for once.

"Ah. Ksssht...One of the Earth Clan. You are the one called Shepard, yes?"

His suit hissed every few words like Din’s has earlier, something all volus did perhaps? Something to ask later.

"How did you know it was me?

"I make a point of being informed of all important individuals that arrive on the Citadel."  
_Kinda creepy, but alright._ "I hear you work for the Shadow Broker."

“Ksssht ....You're well informed..."

Talking to Barla Von, he was able to give them some information, for free surprisingly, to help them find the evidence they needed, hopefully.

 _A krogan, well this could get interesting._ Barla Von was able to point them to C-Sec headquarters, where apparently a krogan mercenary, paid to take down someone who had betrayed the Broker for Saren, was being detained. Maybe while she was there, one of the officers could tell her where to find Garrus, or even better, maybe he's there now. _Won't hurt to check._ Still, Shepard couldn’t help being a bit excited. A real krogan! Just how many different races was she going to meet today?

This was going to be a lot of walking, though.

Thanking the volus for his information, Shepard led her team back towards where they had left c-sec headquarters earlier. Her time on the streets growing up meant that she had an excellent sense of direction...if she could only get through the twisting convoluted mess the builders had made of the walkways. It felt like they were running out of time, but calling transit would take even longer than just walking. She would have loved to have more time to slow down and look at everything they were passing. They jogged past a pair of asari, talking about work it seemed, who glared at them as they passed. Ashley seemed perfectly happy to glare back, keeping her eyes on them until they were well past. Turians admired the artwork on the lake; the preaching hanar was there still. Shepard just barely heard a little of what he was saying over the babble of voices and water. The officer trying to talk to him seemed to not be enjoying this whatsoever. Oh, another keeper!

She kept track of their direction as the path wound its meandering war around and even through businesses, artwork, and small gardens. This place could definitely get you turned around very quickly. Ash was stiff, trying to keep an eye on every new alien and almost gave herself whiplash from the looks of it. Kaiden on the other hand, was staring around in awe at everything. Shepard just wanted to get them where they were going without getting lost, finally getting them to the entrance to c-sec.

She started at the desk, looking up at the turian running the thing to ask about Officer Vakarian, even tried a couple of officers, but apparently talking to C-Sec was useless. None of them were interested in helping the small, nosy humans. However, she did easily find a very large, extremely grumpy Krogan being confronted by several officers, and figured this one was the guy they were looking for. When he left the officers and walked over to them, Shepard thought she would get a crick in her neck looking up so high. Did he just go on forever or what? He seemed amused by the opposite. To find an ally who seemed almost half his size apparently struck him as a bit funny, making his wide mouth twist at the corners as he stared down at this pint-sized warrior. And apparently he not only knew what was going on with Fist, but even knew where they could find the evidence they needed against Saren. If Saren was willing to pay a small fortune to make this quarian go away, then it must be good, for them anyway. Still, they needed Garrus first. 

"I was asking the officers here where to find Garrus, the officer in charge of their investigation against Saren, but none of them really seem to find humans worth helping"

Wrex rumbled in surprise "Garrus Vakarian? He left just before you got here. Said he was going to check on some doc who works in the wards."

"Why is it I ask a ton of people who should know, and they won't give me the time of day, but the one guy who I don't think to ask is the most helpful?" She couldn't believe her luck. It would seem like the big, tough Krogan merc should be the least helpful in the building, but she enjoyed being proven wrong. "Well Wrex, it seems like after getting Garrus, we're going to be going after the same people. It would make it easier on both of us if we joined up. Care to come along?"

"I'll come, but I'm letting you know now, I'm going to kill Fist."

Hmmm...She could work with that. She held out her hand as she introduced herself properly. "Commander Shepard, and these are two of my crew, Kaiden Alenko and Ashley Williams." 

He looked at it for moment before grasping her small fingers between his huge talons, easily dwarfing her hand.

"Shepard. I've heard of you. Those stories failed to mention a thing or two obviously." He grumbled, seeming to make a point of looming over her, but he’d have to do more than that if he actually wanted to scare her. She smiled up at him, though thankfully his hump was a good bit of his full size, so his face wasn’t TOO much taller than her.....nope, still too tall.

"Yup, I'm short. Anyway, welcome aboard. Kaiden, go back to the Normandy and help with the restock." Looking Wrex up and down, she added "We may need extra. Ash, you're coming with us" From the look on Ashley's face, as she looked from Shepard to Wrex and back again, she wasn't liking this plan. "You're going to learn to work with another race. Plus, Krogan are pretty cool, right Wrex?"

Wrex just chuckled in a way that would freeze the blood of more nervous people as he looked down on them before turning to walk towards the door.

Shepard looked at Ashley and shrugged. "He's been here longer than us, so I guess he knows how to get there." Turning, she jogged to catch up to the giant and heard Ashley following behind. "Wrex! Wait up!"

Looking over his shoulder, he scoffed "Well, move those little legs faster human. Not my fault your legs are so small."

He led them down a narrow hallway, the opposite direction from where they’d entered, leaving the chatter of officers and visitors alike behind. 

"Wouldn't it be easier and quicker to just call a transit if we’re going to one of the wards?" Shepard asked as Wrex led them to an elevator to take them down off of the Presidium. 

"Shepard, can you possibly see me fitting with the two of you in a transit. Krogan aren't made for small spaces. Besides it's not far anyway." Looking at it that way, maybe height had disadvantages too.

When the elevator doors opened, Wrex took off at his normal pace, but Shepard still had to jog a little to keep up. Darn tiny legs, it was always so humiliating. Why couldn't bigger people just slow down a bit?

Looking back at her, he sighed and, rolling his eyes, slowed down to allow her to more easily keep pace beside him. "How did someone as small as you ever survive one of the largest known thresher maws attacks?"

She kept up as they went around a corner to a staircase leading up, having no idea where they were going now, but keeping track anyway, always checking for exits.

"I'm small and fast, harder to hit, and really, really lucky. Plus, I'm too stubborn to just give up and die."

"Just lucky Commander?" Ash seemed surprised. As soon as she spoke, she looked back to Wrex, unsure if she wanted to bring herself to his attention.

"And stubborn, but yes, more than you know Williams. I was lucky. A lot of people weren't"

"Hmmm. Stubbornness definitely helps." Wrex chuckled.

Ashley stayed quiet at that one, just listening to their conversation. Or maybe she just didn't want to draw Wrex's attention to the fact that she was still there.

Wow, that was pretty fast. The stairs led right to the Upper Wards. 

"Wait!" Shepard caught a glimpse as they started to walk right on past, pulling her to a stop before practically running up to a large window along the ward, almost pressing her nose to the glass in excitement. "Wow. Look at all of the different ships. This might be one of the best views from inside the Citadel"

Ashley came up to join her as Wrex waited behind them. They spent a few moments admiring the view. Just like she had seen from the Normandy, the arms of the Citadel were slowly moving through the gas of the nebula. The starlight shining through made the gas seem to glow with its own light. She’d read before that it wasn’t just starlight, but radiation she thought; something about it creating heat and light in the dust itself. Purples and pinks, even hints of blue violet and other colors, all swirling around the wards that shined silver with reflected light that winked and flashed as they shifted. And around it all flew every kind of ship she could imagine. Turian, human, asari, volus, if she watched long enough, she would probably even be able to find something of hanar design. They must design their own ships too, right? Even if they might have drell or others build them, they must still....

"Too slow." Wrex groaned behind them. 

"Sorry, just because you've seen it before doesn't mean I can't take a minute to admire it." Shepard sighed, but peeled herself away. "But you're right, we really do need to keep going. I can always look around more later"

"Finally" Wrex walked along the window, further into the ward. Shepard and Ashley turned to follow. Just around the corner, he pointed "There, that's the clinic."

Walking toward the door, Shepard already knew something was very wrong. They could hear raised voices inside, even with the door still closed. If Garrus thought this doctor had a lead on Saren, then maybe Saren found out too.

As she approached, the door opened and everything went nuts. She had a brief glimpse of the men holding the doctor, and of Garrus, who had somehow gotten tucked just around the corner without them noticing. As soon as the thugs heard the door though, they turned, holding the doctor in front of them as a shield.

_Crap._

Before anyone could make another move, Garrus swung around the counter and, in a split second, shot the merc holding the doctor in the head, causing him to jerk back letting go of her as he fell. Impressive...but not good. Shepard leapt into the room and, sliding across the same counter, tackled the doctor down behind an exam table just as the place where she'd been filled with bullets. Making sure the woman stayed down, Shepard pulled her pistol and waited for a break in gunfire. At the same time, Wrex stomped around the corner with his....WAIT...was that a shotgun? It should have been a cannon! She would probably get blown off her feet if she tried to use a shotgun that huge. The two guys caught in the blast certainly were. There was nothing subtle about that gun, but there wasn't anything subtle about Wrex either. Ew, there wasn't anything neat about that gun either, there was a huge mess of crimson on the wall where they had been standing moments before, and Shepard could practically taste copper on the air. _Sorry for the mess, doc._

The last merc seemed to finally understand the hole he and his friends had dug themselves into. He ducked behind the crates at the end of the room and wouldn't come out. Well that made this more difficult, but seeing something on the wall behind him, Shepard had an idea. Motioning to Garrus, she made sure he was ready, and then shot an oxygen tank she had spotted on the wall. It exploded just as beautifully as she had hoped and caught the man in the edge of the blast. Jumping up, shirt on fire, he ended up right in Garrus's scope. The crack of his rifle ended the short fight.

"Alright! Thanks for the help with that one Garrus."

With that, she pulled the doctor up, dusting her off as she made sure the woman wasn't hurt. There had been a lot of bullets flying there for a minute, but luckily none of them had been injured. Their shields had managed to absorb any damage.

"Not that I'm not really glad that you came, but what are you doing here Commander?" Garrus flanged voice sounded surprised behind her.

"Looking for you. Nice shot with that first one by the way." Walking up to him as she spoke, just as he was apparently starting to feel really good about himself, she reached out and grabbed his collar, yanking him down to eye level. Growling, she glared into his startled eyes. "Don't do it again. That could have gotten her killed!"

....

Garrus couldn’t have been more surprised when that door had hissed open to reveal the very commander he’d embarrassed himself in front of earlier. She couldn’t have picked a better time if he’d planned it ahead of time. Now she was complimenting his skills, he flicked his mandibles slowly in pride....right before she yanked him down to her eye level and snarled in his face. It was about the most turian he’d heard any human sound, and was mildly terrifying honestly, no matter her size. 

She was STRONG. 

As she told him off in an angry growl, he realized he had screwed up yet again. He let out a whine of frustration that must have been just outside of her hearing range. Or maybe not. Her eyes flickered, hinting she may have caught the sound after all. Surprising, most humans were completely deaf to their songs. Still, she was never going to let him join her team at this point...wait, did she say she was looking for him?

"I'm sorry Commander. I didn't think. Are you alright Doctor Michel?"

Shepard snorted as he asked. "She's fine, just probably had a crazy scare from being held hostage and then almost getting shot."

"You said you were looking for me. Why?" Garrus cocked his head to the side a little in confusion. Why would she be looking for him when he seemed to make a fool of himself both of the times they had met so far?

.....

Shepard looked at his expression and almost laughed. Who ever thought a raptor could look like a confused puppy? Well that was one she had never known she wanted to see, but was very happy to have had the chance.

"We found a lead on Saren, and you wanted to bring him down. We were going to see if you wanted to join us, so we don't keep just running into each other randomly. Join forces."

His head jerked up in surprise. 

"Absolutely...that is" he looked a bit sheepish as he loosed a VERY high pitched trill like he had a moment before, again, a great expression on a face that resembled a prehistoric predator. "That is, if you still want me on the team?"

"Show a bit more common sense, and we're good. Welcome aboard Garrus." Looking around the small room, Shepard quickly realized she had a problem. There were too many people in here. She sighed. "Well Ash, it looks like we'll work on your inter-racial skills later. Head back to the ship for now"

Ashley looked so relieved to be getting out of working with them, it was hilarious. Then she narrowed her eyes "You want me to leave you with these two?" She looked doubtfully between the turian puppy and the hulking krogan.

Shepard glared at her "Yes, if they're joining the crew, I need to test their skills. Now I gave you an order. Go back to the ship."

Ashley looked like she wanted to say more, but seeing Shepard's expression, decided against it. She walked past towards the door, glaring at Wrex and Garrus as she left.

Talking to a still rattled Doctor Michel, they found that she didn't really have any new information, so Cora's Den was the next stop.

"Can we take transit this time?" She asked. 

"Shepard, I still won't fit in one of those, and the turian is bigger than your other friend, so it's even less likely to work." Wrex seemed way too amused at the whole situation. 

_A krogan, a turian, and a human get in a cab. Sounds like a bad joke._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Wrex. Everyone's fighting and he's just like "I got this" and wades right in.


	7. I guess that's one way to do it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally! With her new allies, Shepard knows where to go to find what she needs in the fight against Saren. Now to go get it....SERIOUSLY GUYS?!

This time, Shepard waved Garrus to take the lead. After all, he actually WORKED here, so he definitely would know the way. _I hope._ He immediately strode off ahead, making her run to keep up. Dang, turians could move! Again with tall people walking too fast! She huffed in frustration as she kept pace. It wasn’t too much of a problem....just embarrassing. Surprisingly, his head tilted towards her at the quiet sound. _Right. Turians have better hearing._ Noting her dilemma with a flick of his mandibles that looked suspiciously like a smirk, he slowed his pace slightly. 

They ended up heading towards the opposite side of the wards, passing a protest on the way. Now here was one of the few benefits of being short. She quickly swung outside of the team, making sure to keep Wrex between her and the rowdy protesters. The narrow minded jerks were harassing and shouting at every human they saw to join their "humanity first" cause, and glaring daggers or straight up throwing insults at any other race, but they didn't spot her, just the huge krogan that she made sure stayed conveniently between the crowd and her. Usually she might be tempted to give them a piece of her mind, but right now they were on a mission.

"Are all krogan as big as you Wrex?" The giant glanced down at her in amusement at the question, but she couldn’t resist.

"We're all big, though not all are as big as I am. Are all humans as small as you?" He said jokingly.

Pointing back at the crowd, Shepard laughed "Obviously not"

"Oh, so it IS unusual for a human to be your size? I thought it was just me." Garrus looked back at her, mandibles spread in what was DEFINITELY a smile...a pointy one.

Passing through another entrance, they ended up in a marketplace. The sign said this was the upper markets.

"Nope, most of us are bigger, though there are others even smaller than me, so I guess there's that...." Shepard replied distractedly while looking over the stalls. They seemed to sell everything here. She saw weapons and mods, armor, and other things they would need, but also everyday things. Appliances and toys, there was even the smell of some kind of roasted meat. Her stomach growled, churning as it loudly reminded her that they had been doing this a while today. Wait, when had she eaten? She would have to come back here eventually. Who knew what she would find.

_Plus, with a krogan and a turian joining, we'll definitely be needing more supplies._ Looking her companions up and down, she considered. Garrus would certainly need more supplies as turians couldn’t even eat the same foods...at least not and avoid starving to death anyway as it did their bodies little good. Wrex....well, that one she wasn’t sure. He was huge, so he probably ate a lot, but what did krogan eat?

They seemed to be going in circles. Garrus did know where he was going, right?

"Hmmm. Have to keep my eyes open for the smaller ones. I'd hate to step on one" Wrex joked, pulling her suddenly back in. _What’s he talking about? Oh, right, tiny humans._

"Very funny, Wrex"

"I thought so"

Garrus, slowed further, tensing as they approached a wide and suspiciously empty area. Shepard was once again thankful that she had chosen to come onto the Citadel fully armed and armored as she put a hand on her pistol. Watching Garrus from the corner of her eye, she saw him do the same and guessed that this place was usually not so deserted. Apparently he’d been watching her as well. As her pistol smoothly slid free of its holster, his eyes flicked to her, giving a quick nod as he pulled his own rifle free to extend with a barely audible click.

Pausing at the doorway, Shepard glanced out cautiously, nerves tight and ready for anything. Everything was quiet, so she eased through....which of course was when all hell tried to break loose. 

Gunfire erupted from the opposite side of the open space, her shields flashing even as she dove behind a short wall, armor clacking sharply as she hit with a huff. Still, if these were the kinds of assassins that Saren was hiring, he really needed to get his money back. Not a single shot reached her and even the couple that managed to clip her shields were barely even close. These guys were idiots who couldn't hit the broad side of a barn. Garrus slammed down right next to her, swinging his rifle smoothly over next to her only to freeze, as a roar shattered the air over even gunfire. His mandibles when slack as her jaw while they both watched in a kind of horrified amazement.

Wrex had charged right past where Garrus and Shepard were crouched, slamming into one of the turians full speed. Shotgun already out, he fired, officially destroying that one in a burst of...blue? Even knowing turians don't bleed red, Shepard thought it still looked weird...and messy.

She and Garrus just watched as Wrex thundered toward the other one, who squeaked and tried to run. _I didn't know turians could make that noise._ It was like watching a train wreck. You just couldn't look away. Wrex caught him before he got very far, of course. Rather than shooting this one, he just grabbed him in a huge, taloned grip and...THREW him over the wall. _Well, that's one way to do it._ Shepard wasn't even sure exactly how far down it was, the view faded into some kind of mist or fog before she could see the bottom. A long way. Approaching the giant, Shepard looked at him, raising an eyebrow before glancing back into the mist, and back to his face as he growled under his breath.

"Having fun?" His eyes swung to her, still lit from within with the thrill of a fight as he gave a slow, dark chuckle.

"Not yet Shepard"

She tapped him on the shoulder before approaching the club. It was still far too quiet. Where was the pounding music these places usually had, the rowdy, obnoxious drunks. _Far, far too quiet._

"Something's wrong, take cover for when I open the door."

Watching Wrex try to squeeze up against the wall to not be visible from inside was laughable. Finally he huffed in annoyance and stood in front of the door. 

"Krogan don’t do "cover" much."

She laughed at his exasperated expression. "All the more reason for bringing you with me now. I can learn all this neat stuff about Krogan before we get to the truly big stuff. You can't use cover well, fine. You can be MY cover and a decent distraction, too. Whenever you're ready big guy."

Wrex nodded to her to open the door. As soon as it hit the frame, Fist's guards opened fire close enough that she could practically feel the breeze as the bullets flew past. Wrex charged in with a roar, which, she had to admit, definitely got the attention off of her and Garrus for a time. They ducked in as soon as Wrex cleared the door to immediately ram one idiot at full speed, tossing him into the shelves behind the counter, and turning to blast another with that crazy gun of his. Shepard couched on the balls of her feet to take cover just inside the door, feeling Garrus do the same. He had his rifle out still and, quickly setting up just over the top of the wall, started picking off those furthest from Wrex, letting him get the ones right up close....which he did with great enthusiasm. _If he wasn't having fun before, he is now._

She watched Garrus work for a moment and had to hand it to him, that shot in the clinic wasn’t a fluke. His speed and accuracy were amazing as he just picked them off, one after another, with ease. Then his eyes flicked to her, taking in her lack of action as she crouched beside him.

“Anytime you’re ready, Commander.” His tone purred with undertones as his primary voice sounded distinctly amused before going back to his target. She laughed, sliding her assault rifle free and jumping into the fight herself. Hurdling the short wall, she ran to the bar in the middle, sliding across it to crouch behind, barely missing the guy Wrex had thrown as she did, glass crunching under her feet. Ugh, a lot of broken bottles here and the air reeked of alcohol. She would probably smell like a drunkard by the time they left. Thankfully, getting hit by a charging krogan at full speed didn't really leave much chance of the guy attacking her.

She blew some escaped strands of hair out of her eyes and peeked over the counter, and nearly laughed again. Man, Wrex was having a blast....literally with that weapon. Everyone was so focused on him, they really didn't see her right there. She jumped in surprise as one of Fist's guards even jumped the counter to use it as shelter as well. Her pistol left the holster, putting one between the eyes without a blink. The crack of a rifle split the air as a shape nearly fell on her from above. Shepard yelped, jumping back only to find the man already dead, a clean headshot announcing the culprit.

"Watch it!"

"Sorry Shepard!" She was pretty sure she heard a chuckle on the comms though.

It was easy enough to tell where Wrex was from the loud, thunderous roars and the shattering explosion of that cannon he carried. Peeking over the counter again, she spotted guard trying to sneak up on Garrus from behind some overturned tables. Swinging her rifle up, she opened fire, recoil slamming her shoulder at the strange angle, ripping through his shields and throwing him against the table he had been hiding behind. Between the three of them, it really had been a short fight, but entertaining. 

"Coast is clear!” She laughed under her breath as she caught up to a beaming Wrex.” That was short."

"Wait!" 

Garrus was standing a distance away and looked rather odd. He was standing very still and looked like he was thinking hard, shifted his head one way, then the other. He looked like...an owl, she thought, maybe a curious puppy, but definitely more bird of prey vibes. Just one more thing relating them to birds. _Just how good is a Turian's hearing?_ She kept silent, watching in interest as he listened a second and then quietly made his way through the tossed tables and chairs to a corner of the room. How did someone so big walk so silently? 

Pausing, he flicked his head to the side...and lunged. A woman screamed as he pulled her up out of hiding and immediately letting her go in surprise as she flailed. Shepard was impressed, she had no idea someone had been there, but it was obvious this young woman was not part of Fist's security. She looked like she just worked here and was trapped when they must have cleared out the bar. Stepping over, she pulled the poor girl up from the floor, looking her over before giving her a push towards the door.

"You got awfully lucky this time, kid. You might want to be more careful picking your next job." 

The young woman, pushed hair out of her face with a trembling hand as she edged away, seemingly surprised to not be shot. "I will...ummm...I'll just be going now?" Shepard nodded, shooing the woman away before heading back to Wrex, noting when she made the door. Looking to Garrus for a second, she started to ask about it, but decided against it. There was still work to be done, she could ask later. 

"Well that was different" Wrex commented.

"You couldn't hear that?" Garrus looked surprised. "I knew we could hear better than humans, but I figured a krogan would hear her, she was breathing so loud."

Wrex just grunted, before turning and stomping towards the next door, shoving tables and other debris out of the way as he went like a living snowplow. Shepard and Garrus joined him, setting up before the door, and, opening it, found themselves face to face with the barrels of two pistols.

Wrex growled, swinging up the shotgun he was still holding.

"WOAH!" Shepard pushed the barrel back down again, staring at the two people holding the guns. These two were DEFINITELY not part of Fist's security. She didn't know where they had gotten the guns, but they hadn't had them on them. For that matter, they didn't have much of anything on them. Shepard's team had found themselves face to face....with two strippers. The scantily clad Asari, in her slick, black outfit, left nothing to the imagination and wasn't too surprising, but the shirtless human man in similar pants that hid just as little?

_Well this is a new one._

"Wrex, I think we can safely say that these two aren't part of Fist's thugs, right?"

Realizing they weren't about to be shot, the two looked at each other, back to Shepard, and lowered the guns.

"Why don't you guys grab some clothes or a jacket or something and find somewhere else to be."

The man nodded. "Yeah, Fist doesn't pay us enough to deal with soldiers." Both of them walked past to leave the bar. 

"I hope they remember to get something to wear before they leave."

Garrus groaned "I don't think I can ever unsee that."

Shepard laughed "How come we don't ever see those men at most bars. Usually it's just the asari or women. Though, " she looked over her shoulder at them as they left "Tight jeans and boots would have been better."

Shepard saw Garrus look at her, mandibles slack in shock.

"What?! I'm just saying!" 

"Would've still been faster to kill them"

"Do you want to explain why you turned a practically naked man into confetti with that ridiculous gun of yours?...I don't" She surveyed the full room before them, beginning to carefully maneuver around sloppily stacked crates of... "If this is some of his smuggling, the guy's not the brightest"

Wrex just looked at her incredulously "He turned on the Shadow Broker, how smart can he be?"

She laughed, nodding as they reached the door, icon showing it was surprisingly unlocked. Flexing her hand in thought, _Well, we have to go in sometime._ she shrugged and ...

Garrus grabbed her hand, talons wrapping smoothly around her slight wrist to stop her.

"He has turrets Shepard" She glanced at him, watching his eyes as they flicked between her and the door, head cocking slightly as he appeared to listen. _That’s just not fair._

“You can hear that from here?!” At his nod, she groaned. “Well, at least we know they're there. Hey Wrex, once we take care of the turrets, think you can pin Fist, so we can talk to him. I don't want to kill him just yet."

Wrex shrugged "Sure"

With that, his talons let released. She flexed her wrist as she stared at him, eyebrow raised, but no harm. Plus, watching a turian squirm a little proved fun. Garrus pulled his mandibles in, trembling slightly on the jaw as he lowered his head, eyes flicking away. Now that DEFINITELY looked like a submission to authority, reminding her of some predators the ducked and avoided eye contact with an alpha. She chuckled, sound bringing his eyes back as he relaxed before bringing his rifle back to ready position with a nod.

The door whirred open, revealing empty space that she cautiously entered, now able to hear the high hum of ready drones waiting for them. Sliding in, the pitch changed.

She leapt, reaching cover as the turrets swung toward them, riddling the wall behind where she had been with holes, sending clouds of debris into the air.

Garrus opened his omnitool and tapped something she couldn't see. One of the turrets fell to the ground, sparking as Wrex swung his shotgun like a bat, knocking the other out of the air.

CRACK.

_Different, but effective._

Then Wrex charged through the door and into the office, not even stopping as he slammed into Fist, and then the wall. Shepard winced in sympathy as he slid down the wall only to yelp as Wrex planted a foot on him before he could get up.

Shepard came up to stand beside Wrex. 

"Where's the quarian, Fist?" She demanded.

The coward immediately started to babble, telling them not only where the Quarian would be, but also probably everything else he had done wrong in the last week or more. 

_Good grief._

BOOM!

Shepard yelped, warmth spraying her skin as she froze in shock. Mentally smacking herself at the old reaction, she shook her ringing head. Yikes, from this range, that shotgun nearly blew out her eardrums. 

"Can you at least wait till I'm not standing right in front of him Wrex!?" 

Wrex's shotgun blast had missed Shepard, barely, but her ears might be bleeding and you can't stand that close to the target and not get...messy. There was blood on her armor, her face,...EW even her hair. Dang. She wasn't too sorry to see him dead, the guy was obviously beyond dirty, but at least wait until she moved away.

"I told you I was going to kill him." He said, plainly amused by her outburst.

"Yeah, you did, but DON'T DO IT WHILE I'M ONLY INCHES AWAY!" She shouted at the hulking idiot, getting right up in his space as she glared into his face. 

_Ugh! I'm surrounded by idiots!_

At least they got the information they needed, which meant they needed to hurry. Right.

"Move, we need to get there before Saren's men do!"

Where did Fist get all these guys that he could just throw at enemies? They had to fight through Cora's Den...again! They didn't have time for this! Thankfully, these weren't any smarter than the last bunch and they weren't really concerned with killing them all, just getting out. Shepard simply let Wrex go first and he blasted or ran over anyone that came between them and the door.

_Ouch! That probably hurt._

Once out of the bar, Garrus’s long legs pulled him to the front as he raced down a side passage, almost dragging them along for the ride as Shepard had no idea where they were going. At least C-sec was less likely to get them turned around and lost, which the quarian couldn't afford right now. They barely made it in time even then. She blinked, breaking into a sprint as Garrus disappeared from view, ducking down a narrow passage and finally slowing, reaching where he crouched behind cover. She ducked, swinging behind some crates to hide, figuring Wrex would join them. _Ah...Newton’s First Law: An object in motion will stay in motion unless acted on by an outside force._ Shepard couldn’t believe she hadn’t seen it coming when Wrex blew right past them at full charge, immediately fully visible to Saren’s cronies

....

Tali had followed Fist's directions, arriving to nervously survey this, frankly pretty shady looking, alleyway exactly on time, but this guy DID NOT look like an information broker or anyone who worked for one. She hesitated, but how did she know what an information broker would look like? Still she was fairly certain that this ragtag group of turian and salarian thugs was not it. Well, one turian and a couple of salarians, all in armor and carrying weapons. Salarians didn’t seem like the best thugs. The turian didn't even have real colony markings. He probably didn't even belong to a clan anymore. She'd never seen one with their face all marked in white to look like a creepy fanged face. She discreetly reached to her hip to check her pistol. 

The turian came up, asking for the information, but she wasn't about to give it to this creep. There was no way he worked for the Shadow Broker. She was already feeling jumpy and freaked out, but then he put his hand on her, rubbing her arm and making her skin crawl under her suit. She smacked his hand away. _Pervert!_

"The deals off"

He followed as she tried to back away, pressing into her space as the salarians moved to try to corner her. She just barely caught a glimpse of movement, and looking past the salarians, saw one of the biggest krogan she had ever seen come charging over the stairs. 

The turian freaked out, making a grab for her, but she lashed out with a foot, catching him in the soft gut as hard as she could. Reaching for her belt, she grabbed a grenade and activated it, slinging it at the salarians.

_Too close!!_

Even as it left her hand, she knew she was way too close. She lunged sideways, skidding around a crate, just as it exploded, killing the salarians as a sharp ticking sound marked metal striking her shelter. She sighed in relief at the close call.

_Way too close._

....

Shepard just watched the chaos that ensued, impressed. The quarian could definitely handle herself, she'd give her that. Hmmm...now that could be useful. The kicked Turian doubled over, almost as if he were a human kicked in the groin. She felt Garrus flinch a bit in sympathy with a high whine. He didn't even manage to dodge the grenade blast. It wasn't close enough to kill him, but by then Wrex was. Yup, Saren definitely needs to rethink his hires. She was quite sure these guys weren't worth near what he was paying them. 

Noticing the fight was already over, the quarian cautiously slunk from cover, watching them carefully as she stayed tense. Shepard noticed she still had her pistol out just in case and was so tense that she had no doubt that slight figure could go zero to sixty in one second flat, bolting like a rabbit if she had to. 

_Good, she's smart._

"Good timing" The quarian’s mouth piece lit in time with her comment, voice sounding young even through the suit helmet as she watched them, obviously trying to judge whether she was still in danger. Shepard kept her movements slow as she put away her weapon, holding hands out to keep from spooking the girl as she approached, listening as the quarian spoke again. "Aren't you a bit young?" Shepard chuckled, making the girl relax further.

"Funny, I was about to say the same. What are you, 19? You must be fairly young to still not have finished your pilgrimage and rejoined the fleet." 

She snorted, mask lighting to mimic the sound again. "I'm not quite that young. We usually don't leave until we're 20 or 21, though I'm surprised you know about it." She put her pistol away. "Not that I'm not glad, but who are you people?"

"I'm Commander Shepard, and I hear you have evidence on Saren. We're trying to bring him down."

"Ah. I'm Tali'zorah, and if evidence against Saren is what you want, then I think I can help."

Leaving, they made their way back to the Embassies. Once again, they had to talk to Udina, because that always made Shepard’s day, right? The sniveling little weasel immediately cornered her as they entered the office, accusing her of gunfights on the wards, which WAS true, but what were they supposed to do, just roll over and die when shot at? He didn't care if they or anyone else had been injured or killed, just that he might not look good. Politicians, she breathed a tired sigh before presenting what they’d gained.

_Can I just go back to the ship now myself?...tired._

Still, with Tali's evidence, he at least listened and they were able to get another meeting with the Council, so not all bad for a day's work, right? Of course, with the late hour, he wasn't able to get a meeting that day. He sent a copy of the evidence upward, but the earliest they would meet was tomorrow morning.

_Fine by me._ With everything scheduled, Shepard turned to her new team.

"Do you have somewhere safe to stay, Tali?" She didn't want to leave her to get shot again, but Tali slumped in embarrassment, shaking her head glumly. 

"The Shadow Broker was my last chance, but you saw how that worked out."

Even as unpleasant as Udina was, he wasn't going to let their main source of evidence be put at risk. Grumbling as he scrolled through his omnitool and made a couple of selections, he turned to Shepard, sending something to her tool.

"I've set up a reservation with a nearby hotel. Nothing fancy, but I want you and a team to stay there with Tali for the night and make sure she's safe." She could have cheered. She had been about to offer room on her ship, surrounded by vetted soldiers, but this was WAY more comfortable. _SCORE! A hotel instead of the sleep pods on the Normandy, and I'm not even paying!_

She contained her smile, nodding with a politeness and respect she didn’t feel towards the ambassador and started to leave.

"Shepard," Turning back to Udina, she saw him grimace with distaste as he looked her up and down "make sure to get cleaned up and wear something nice in case things go well tomorrow."

She managed to not roll her eyes, but nodded and left the embassy with her team before looking at the information he had sent, passing it on to Garrus. 

"Garrus, Wrex, take Tali to the hotel he sent us." She groaned, rubbing her head "I guess I need to get something first, but I'll meet there in a little bit."

She watched as they left, before heading towards the docks with a yawn, blinking blearily against the bright Presidium lights.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha! Wrex is still fun. No cover needed there. As always, appreciate any comments, or advice, or both...WHICHEVER! Have fun!


	8. Old prejudices, new friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some good fun at her friends expenses. What else are you to do with a bunch of aliens sharing a room?

Hoisting her bag higher on her shoulder, Shepard watched the two marines with amusement as they approached their rooms. Kaiden looked around curiously. She could just see the questions running through his head. Why had she taken them here? Weren't they just going to spend the night on the Normandy or _maybe_ in the Alliance barracks nearby, if they were lucky?

"So," Shepard began "There's good news and bad news"

"Commander?" Their confusion was so much fun. When she'd gone to grab them, Shepard hadn't told them anything except to follow.

"Good news, we found the evidence we need,....buuuuut it's in the hands of a quarian that Saren would love to get his talons on" 

Ashley sniffed at the news, her disgust clear. 

"Quarian?...More like little sneak thief. How did she even get it?! Nothing good ever came from quarians." She mumbled, not very quietly either. Shepard had enough of this. First the comments on the Normandy, then on the Presidium, the constant disdain, this was getting under control NOW.

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" Shepard grabbed her by the armor collar, yanking her to eye level with a snarl as Ashley's eyes widened in surprise. "You will NEVER say such a thing about ANY race! Even if you have met a quarian, WHICH YOU HAVEN'T, and even if they are a thief, WHICH SHE ISN'T, you are NEVER to generalize all people into one lump because of one example. Guess what! One of the first humans to say they were going to help this girl is a liar and a criminal who betrayed her to Saren himself, condemning her to likely a painful death! You know what she hasn't said once? She hasn't accused all humans of being criminals! Traitors! Or monsters! That makes her better than you in my eyes right now." Shoving her back in disgust, Ashley stumbled and thumped to the floor, breath knocked out of her. Kaiden watched them both with wide eyes as Shepard ran her trembling hand through her hair, taking a deep breath and releasing some of her frustration at the dense marine.

"You need to learn to think before you speak Ash. Just as you are looking to other races with doubt, the other races are looking to you. If someone else thinks humans are rude and judgmental, are you proving them wrong?" Looking up at her, Ashley blinked in shock, obviously never having considered it that way. _Good._ She looked thoughtful as she pulled herself from the floor. "Anyway, as I was saying before I was cut off..."Shepard glared at her again, but at least she had the grace to look sheepish about it.”Saren would just leap for joy if he could kill this girl and take any evidence we have, so Udina has...hmmm...reluctantly" Kaiden barked a laugh, before coughing at her expression "Reluctantly agreed to supply us with a couple of rooms for the night to keep eyes on her until the morning."

"Seriously?! Awesome!...wait" Kaiden brief excitement gave way, suspicion taking over. "and the downside, Shepard?"

Shepard’s lips curled in an evil grin, dark mirth at their, specifically Ash’s, surprise punishment clear on her face. The two future victims glanced at each other with matching worried expressions as she gestured to their door.

"She's already here. Go on." 

Kaiden and Ashley glanced from her to the door and back again in suspicion. Finally, Kaiden, good little soldier that he was, knocked on the door.

The thing SLAMMED inwards, smashing into the wall as he stumbled backward with a yelp finding himself nose to barrel with the wrong end of a CANNON.

Shepard nearly doubled over laughing. 

"Shepard?" The rumble of Wrex's voice greeted her as he glared at the two over his shotgun.

"Wrex!” She took a breath, wiping tears of mirth from her eyes as she greeted the giant. “I brought friends. You remember Ash and Kaiden" Waving at her two now very nervous squad mates, Kaiden still leaning back to avoid the weapon in his face.

 

"Hmmmm...." He slanted his eye to her "I can't shoot them either?"

"Nope, these squishies are with me." 

"No fun, Shepard." He lowered his gun reluctantly, grumbling as he walked away, but the corner of his mouth twitched, giving him away.

Ashley and Kaiden just watched him go for a moment before turning on her.

"What the....!"

"Did he just want to shoot us....just because?!" 

"Seriously!"

Shepard chuckled at the looks on their faces.

"Krogan! What can I say, they like shooting things. I mean, they head butt as greetings, challenge, or really just because!" Looking thoughtfully at them she added "You may want to learn a bit....and maybe wear helmets."

"Commander, no helmet is made to head butt KROGAN!" Kaiden, always trying to be a voice of reason. _Boring._

"You'd be surprised." 

Wrex's rumbling laugh drifted out of the room. Shepard waved for them to follow her, entering the room after him. Garrus and Tali were waiting inside for them, Garrus’s mandibles wide in turian mirth as Tali’s eye shine seemed to crinkle.

"Anyway, the downside is your roommate...well, downside for you, I thought it was funny." She started to chuckle again, remembering Kaiden's face.

Ashley waited a minute, before sliding cautiously through the door, keeping eyes on Wrex. He glared right back at her, wide mouth curling into a grim smile. She swallowed dryly and didn't look too sure about this.

"Him?" She asked nervously.

"Yup." Shepard smiled triumphantly as she waved to the big, red beast. "I did have to cancel your lesson in alien cooperation earlier. Consider this your first test. Keep that mouth of yours under control enough to survive a night with a krogan, and I'll consider it a success."

"And me Commander?" Even Kaiden looked doubtful at Wrex's leer. 

"Well, Ash needs to because I'm going to get her to learn to hold that tongue or else. I want you to stay too, because you'll keep it from getting too crazy in here. I'd rather you both be in at least mostly one piece for the council meeting." Kaiden swallowed nervously.

"Why me?!" His eyes were wide as he looked back to her. Keep these two in line? How was he supposed to do that?!

She just smiled. Even Tali looked like she might be enjoying this, but it was hard to be certain with the mask.

"You, because you're Mr. Nice Always-Follows-the-Rules Guy. I need a nice, mellow influence in here to make sure things don't go crazy. Well," Glancing back at Wrex, he chuckled darkly, an evil grin on his face "Not too crazy anyway. If anyone, besides me, can keep them at least somewhat civil, it's probably you." 

He was stunned, but she pretended not to notice as she continued, opening the joining door and ushering Garrus and Tali through.

"It's not like we won't be right next door anyway....so have fun, hold your tongue Ash,....and don't die. Bye!" Waving with a smile, she closed the door on Ashley's horrified...and slightly green...face.

.....

Ashley stared at the wrong side of the door in horror for a minute, before peeking sideways at Kaiden.

Then staring at him in surprise. She was freaking out, ditched to fend for herself with the worst of the worst and he was just staring at the door with that SAPPY grin on his face!

"What's up with you?!" She was going to die! Why wasn't he taking this seriously?

"Nothing!" He blushed, jerking his gaze to the floor in embarrassment.

"Obviously not!" Ashley glanced at Wrex, but he seemed fairly relaxed, just watching them with amusement. He didn't seem too violent right now. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad.

"Well, it's just..." He was turning even more red now as she just stared, incredulous "Shepard said I'm nice" he mumbled.

Now both her and Wrex were staring as if he'd lost his mind. Ash gave herself a mental shake and shrugged.

"Well, the rumor for a little while was that she had a crush on you." He looked up in surprise, making her snort at the absurdity. "Of course not you dummy! Shepard is nice to everyone. Just because someone is nice to you doesn't mean they have a crush on you".

"Why not?! She thinks I'm nice! You heard her too!" 

"You read way too much into that one comment." Ashley shook her head at him, he was so dense sometimes. She jumped as Wrex appeared beside her, nodding. How did he move so quietly? 

"Humph, she called you whelp who follows orders. It's not even a good thing, almost an insult. She'd be more likely to pick me." He rumbled thoughtfully "If any of you squishies could handle this much krogan, it would be Shepard. She's practically part krogan already."

"Stop it! She's not...I...YOU!...ARGH!" Kaiden flushed red in embarrassment and anger now, stomping to the other side of the room grumbling. "Just because you guys are jealous and she might like me, you have to be jerks." 

Ashley and Wrex looked at each other. The mix of Kaiden's ridiculous assumption and the somehow perplexed expression that was now on the krogan's face was too much for her. She snorted and started laughed. After a moment, even Wrex joined in laughing at these insane, tiny humans.

"That one's not too bright is he?" He thumbed over his shoulder at the sulky, man-child.

"Usually he's not so bad, but I think he must have cracked his head on that last mission. Usually he's actually pretty smart." 

Looking back at him, Wrex shook his head. "Don't see it."

"SHUT UP!"

Which just made them both laugh again. Wrex thumped her on the back, almost knocking her to the floor before she caught herself. 

"You're not so bad...for a squishy human." 

This definitely may not end up nearly as bad as she thought.

....

Closing the door behind her, Shepard looked around. The rooms weren't fancy, but a bed was all she needed. A couple of beds and chairs would have been overkill for just her, but thankfully Garrus and Tali were here too. Rubbing a hand over her aching, itchy, sleepy eyes, she shuffled to one chair and set down her bag before tossing herself down with a muffled clatter. With a jaw cracking yawn, she riffled through the duffle, pulling out a piece of heavy armor and a cloth. Garrus noticed that this one was a different color and seemed to have some design on it, but didn't recognize it.

Tali threw herself dramatically on one of the beds and began to giggle.

"Did you see their faces?! That was amazing!"

"We'll see. Ash did look a little green around the gills with the idea. At least with adjoining rooms, they can't get too crazy without us hearing it." Right on cue, they hear Wrex's rumbling laugh. "Well, if they can make him laugh, it must not be going too badly."

"I don't know, krogan seem to laugh at anything violent, too." Tali seemed unsure about the idea.

“Not all Krogan are violent, Tali." At Garrus's expression, she changed her statement. "Okay, not all Krogan are violent ALL the time. There have to be other things they like. Though, I'm not sure what something like Krogan art would look like."

"I don't think I want to know" Tali muttered to Garrus, who nodded in agreement.

Still, Garrus sat next to her, looking from her to the door thoughtfully.

"So, why did you decide to stick with us anyway? You could have stayed with your normal crew instead of us dextros. That Kaiden guy seems to like you, I'm sure he'd be happy to share." He flared one mandible in a crooked, cocky grin as she lashed out, shoving his shoulder.

"Shut up, Garrus! He doesn't even know me." Rolling her eyes at him, she began to examine the greave she was holding, cleaning it thoroughly. He wasn't going to be distracted though.

"You still haven't answered the question." He insisted, still with that smug grin on his face.

"I figured I would personally keep an eye on Tali" Looking up, she gave him a smile of her own. "and besides, you have the prettiest mandibles, if you must know."

Those same mandibles snapped to his face with a sharp click. "Um..." Tali leaned closer to him.

"You realize you're the only one with mandibles." She whispered. He coughed.

"Spirits, you're cruel, Shepard. Don't do that! Working with other species can be so weird."

“It could be weirder. I could be trying to flirt with a Hanar. Do you even know how to tell a male from a female? They look almost identical." She watched him slyly, seeing if he would take the bait.

"Almost? Every Hanar I've ever seen looks exactly the same." He'd never noticed any difference anyway. He must have said the wrong thing, because Tali groaned.

"No, Shepard." But Shepard grinned, continuing with a mischievous shine in her eyes.

"They don't look EXACTLY the same, but the difference is so subtle that most people miss it."

Suddenly, Garrus wasn't certain he really wanted to know. If her expression was anything to go by, probably not, but she was probably going to tell them anyway.

"Males have an extra leg"

"That's it?" He cocked his head at her in confusion. It seemed like it should have been much more awkward than that.

Shepard grinned triumphantly as he walked right into it. Tali groaned, dropping her head into her hands.

"It's a penis."

He choked.

"Wait... WHAT?!?" Spluttering, his mandibles drooped in shock. _Wait!...So they...No! Seriously?_ Tali sighed between her fingers.

"Keelah, Shepard! You just had to, didn't you?"

"Look it up sometime. Hanar reproduction is hilarious. Similar to the octopus, a creature we have on Earth. They can just detach the whole thing and hand it to a female. It grows back later of course." She laughed, watching both of their expressions. Well, his anyway. She had to guess by Tali's body language what her face looked like. Interesting to think that Tali had already known. _Maybe not so innocent as she seems._

"How do you even know this stuff?" He'd worked with other races for years and been around them his whole life, but he'd had no idea about that. Thinking about it, this might explain some weird occurrences in earlier cases that he'd been told to ignore. Ew....yup, really wishing he hadn't heard that.

"I have a curious mind. Anyway," She replace the now clean armor piece and pulled out the next, beginning the same process as she talked. "are mandibles really something that a female Turian would compliment?"

He nodded.

"That or their fringe. Some males take quite a bit of pride in their fringe, polishing or decorating it to make it look nicer." She glanced up, confused.

"Decorating?"

"Oh yeah, paints, piercings, jewelry, that sort of thing.”

Shepard paused as she reached for her bag again, examining him for a moment.

"Hmmm....well, your fringe does look nice, to me at least, and I’ve been meaning to ask about your markings. Yours are simpler, less elaborate than some I've seen, but I like the way the blue looks with your plate color. Is there some significance to it, or is it a personal choice?"

"Really, Shepard?" Tali was shaking her head as Garrus stared at Shepard in surprise. Had she really just said a Turian looked nice? It might be the first time he'd ever heard a human compliment him, or any other Turian for that matter, on their appearance. He stumbled over his words for a moment, blushing and thankful it wasn't as visible as with humans.

"Are you blushing?" Well, he thought it wasn't visible.

"No!" Tali and Shepard looked at each other at the obvious lie, laughing.

"You're a terrible liar, Garrus" Tali fell back on the mattress, laughing at his disgruntled, embarrassed expression.

"Oh be quiet! If you must know, Shepard, our markings are clan related. They say which clan and world we come from. Another Turian could tell from across the room that I'm part of clan Vakarian and from Palaven, even if they know nothing else about me."

"Cool!" Turning her attention to Tali, Garrus gave a sigh of relief as Shepard began to ask about her people. She'd heard of Quarians, but seeing one was relatively uncommon due to how few there were. They were around, there were just less of them and most stayed with the Flotilla.

Garrus realized, listening to them, that Shepard hadn't been kidding. She seemed to have an extremely curious nature. As she polished her armor, they talked about their races, home worlds, histories, and any number of seemingly random things. He was surprised to learn quite a bit about humans and Quarians that he'd never known before, all in a couple of hours. 

"So wait, the Geth chased your ancestors from your home world?!" The idea of losing Earth to a human creation was horrifying. Of course, movies and books about such events were common. Garrus scoffed.

"Yeah, leaving the Geth free to be a blight on the rest of the Galaxy. I hope you're sufficiently sorry for..."

"Don't make me knock you in the head, Garrus" Shepard held up the current armor piece threateningly as she narrowed her eyes at him as he snapped his jaw shut at her glare. "Tali, how long ago was this?"

"Shepard, this isn't the first time...."

"HOW LONG?!" Still Tali paused before answering.

"We've been exiled for roughly three centuries." She looked down at her hands, watching her gloved fingers move in her lap. "It is the long period in sterile ship environments that damaged our immune systems to the point of requiring our suits. We would die without them."

"And I'm guessing you aren’t like Asari that live for centuries?" She thought they were one of the races that were similar to humans in lifespan.

"No, around one century, if you're lucky. We can live that long, but the average is much less due to the risk of fatal infections." From the sound of her voice, Shepard wondered who she had lost. She sounded sad, but resigned to her life, the lives of all of her people. Turning her glare on Garrus, she jabbed a finger at him.

"Garrus, you have relatives who fought my people just in the last thirty years...Would it be fair for me to hold a grudge against YOU for it? Hated you for a crime someone else committed?"

It hadn't ever crossed his mind to think of it that way. He knew a lot of humans who hated Turians, and a lot of Turians who hated humans. Both seemed stupid, but as ridiculous as their views seemed, he had done the same without even thinking about it. Shepard continued as he considered, questioning what he thought he'd known to be true.

"Tali didn't invent the Geth, fight against the Geth, or do anything that contributed to their loss of Rannoch in any way, but you would cast the blame on her anyway. What’s the difference? Her people have been punished hundreds of times over, should she pay more because of a crime she didn’t even commit?"

She stopped to really look at him. He was sitting there, staring at the floor in thought. After a moment, he raised his eyes to Tali's, tilting his chin up. Shepard was right. What he had always assumed of Quarians was not only incorrect, but morally WRONG.

"I'm...I never thought. I'm sorry Tali. I never considered it, but Shepard's right and it wasn't your fault, nor should it be." He thought for a moment, before continuing. “I can’t say I’ll never say something stupid, but I will try.”

Tali's eyes widened. She'd never heard an apology from anyone. Who was Shepard, that with a few words she could overturn someone's views completely. She stood, walking to him and laying a hand on his arm.

"It's okay Garrus. It's not right, but you aren't anywhere near the first one to accuse me of things I haven't done. The difference is that you want to change that now." She hugged him before backing away and sitting back in her spot on the bed, looking at her two new, very unlikely and surprising, friends.

Putting the last piece back in the bag, Shepard yawned wide as she stretched.

Well guys, we ought to call it a night. Someone does need to keep watch though, just to be safe. Why don't I take the first couple of hours and then..."

"Shepard, you look like you're about to fall over." Even he could see she was exhausted, and he wasn't usually very good at reading humans. She'd be useless if she didn't sleep. "Turians need less sleep than humans anyway. I'll watch for a while and wake you later."

She supposed it showed her how tired she was that she didn't even want to try to argue. Sending a message to Kaiden next door to decide watch rotation, she laid down on one of the beds, drifting almost before she hit the pillow.

"She really was tired, wasn't she?" Tali was amazed anyone could fall asleep so quickly.

"We did a lot today to get to you. Honestly, she looked somewhat tired the first time I saw her, before we even started." Standing, he switched out the lights. “Go ahead and rest, Tali. I'll keep an eye out." The only source of light now was Tali's eyes glowing behind her faceplate, but even those slowly faded as she started to doze. Garrus just relaxed into his chair, letting his hearing open further in the dark, listening and watching.

Thinking of their time, he did realize something...odd. Throughout everything that had happened, they'd talked for hours, laughed and joked, ribbed each other about funny stories and experiences, but Shepard had said nothing at all about her own personal past. He felt like he'd known her for years, but knew nothing about her.

No, that wasn't true. He let out a low thrum, as he thought. He knew who she was now. She was brave, kind, far too stubborn, often mischievous, but would never harm someone if she didn't have to. Perhaps knowing who she used to be didn’t matter so much after all. Smiling in the dark, he stretched his legs out and let the hours pass in the night as he considered the day’s events and his strange, new friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I remember properly, the actual idea for hanar from Mass Effect was very different ...and boring. This one was a fun discussion between myself and a friend and absolutely HAD to be included. 
> 
> Oh, and I always thought it was funny that everyone treats Tali as though she's so innocent minded. She sure wasn't with male Shep.😁


	9. Strange Spectres

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yaaaay....politicians. ugh. Still, much to even her own surprise, they finally get what they need....and something that she doesn't.

Morning found them facing the Council...again. 

_Yay. Nothing makes for a better morning than bureaucrats._

If Shepard had thought the Turian Councillor, Sparatus, had hated them before, the look on his face when Tali was allowed before them was priceless. Shepard could just imagine what was going on in his head and didn't like it one bit, but at least he kept it restricted to the occasional withering glare, mandibles tight in his distaste. 

It all changed when Udina played Tali's evidence. The snob’s eyes widened, mandibles slack in about the biggest expression of shock you could get from him, she was sure. Even the asari and salarian councilors looked stunned at the revelation. Their very best had betrayed not just them, but the Galaxy as a whole.

 _Yup, choke on that ya jerks! You supported the wrong guy!_ Shepard had to literally bite her tongue, almost drawing blood to keep from yelling "I TOLD YOU!" to the whole Citadel. That would be a bad idea, but a glance at Garrus showed that he seemed to be trying really hard to fight the same impulse as he met her gaze, mandible twitching as he contained a small smirk.

With a sigh, the turian councillor nodded.

"This evidence is undeniable. For Saren to do such a thing...no! It cannot be allowed, Ambassador. He will be stripped of his title and brought in for judgment for his crimes." 

Shepard barely avoided rolling her eyes. _Undeniable, but doesn't mean you don't want to deny it._

Surprisingly, the Asari Councillor actually knew the other voice, naming a Matriarch Benezia. Why she was working with Saren to bring about a galactic armageddon, no one could say, but at least they had a name.

For all that they had already proven themselves right once, the Council was quick to dismiss the rest of their claims. Shepard didn't really blame them though. She had actually seen, through the beacon's garbled message, some of the damage that the Reapers could rain on the galaxy, but without having seen it, it would be a hard story to swallow. 

"I'm more curious about what this Conduit is. It's obvious Saren needs it for something. The Reapers are obviously a myth, a lie he is using to control the Geth, but the Conduit...." It was hard to fight the Salarian Councillor. His statement made sense, but Shepard had seen what they could do and would never forget it. She had to try. Garrus glanced at her in surprise as she stepped next to the Ambassador.

"We tried to warn you about Saren, but you didn't believe us. The Reaper's were real and still are! If Saren finds that Conduit, they will wipe us all out just as they did the Protheans! I've seen it!" The Turian Councillor shook his head.

"Listen to yourself, Commander! A God-like race of sentient machines? No, Saren is now a rogue Spectre on the run, unable to do anything. He has no resources. We will catch him in time, but for now, he can't do anything further."

Even Udina looked furious. Were they just going to continue to ignore his crimes, just waiting for him to give himself up? 

"That's not enough! He has to be hunted down or he'll just keep attacking other colonies" 

"And what do you expect us to do, Ambassador?" Sparatus sniffed "If we send in our fleet, it would spark a war with the Terminus. The best course would be to wait and let him makes the next move"

Shepard thought carefully. That wasn't really their best option at all. Glancing to Anderson, he caught her eye and nodded. He could tell exactly what she had thought and agreed. Cutting through Udina's protest, she addressed the three above them. 

"There is another option! One that satisfies everyone’s needs."

Everyone froze, watching her in obvious confusion.

"The Ambassador wants Saren stopped, you want to avoid war..." Seeing their agreement, she smiled. "And humanity wants a Spectre. Let me bring him back. Udina get's his Spectre, Saren's brought to justice, and you avoid unnecessary bloodshed. Everyone wins."

Councillor Sparatus bared his teeth at her presumption, but the Asari Councillor, Tevos, stopped him. 

"I can see the benefit." She looked to the Salarian Councillor, and Valern nodded agreement.

"Commander Shepard, step forward."

Stepping to the front as Udina moved back, Shepard couldn't believe that she had actually succeeded.

......

Garrus felt his mandibles sag in disbelief. She'd actually changed the Council's minds, convincing them to give humanity a foothold, and he was here to see the whole thing. He couldn't stop grinning as he watched Udina step back and allow Commander Shepard the spotlight, armor gleaming under the Chamber lights. He barely even heard their words as he watched the small woman in awe and not a small amount of pride, thrumming in pleasure. To get to see such an event was a privilege he never thought he would get to have. 

Others had turned all over the Council Chambers, coming to view history in the making. The first human Spectre had been named today and he was not only there, but had actually helped make this possible. 

......

Thanking the Council, Shepard was dismissed to begin her mission. Hunt down Saren and bring him in, at any cost. She turned from the Council, still a little in shock. When she had offered the option, she hadn't been sure they would take it. Now, suddenly she was the very first of her kind to make the most elite group in the galaxy. Stepping down, Anderson offered his hand, which she grasped firmly.

"I'm so proud of you." He whispered.

Pulling back, she met his eyes and her own burned to see the emotion there. Nodding, she stepped back as Udina approached, interrupting them. 

"You'll need a ship of course, a crew and supplies. It may take time. Anderson, come with me." Already running his numbers, she saw. She didn't really expect more, but it would have been nice. _Thanks for succeeding where I've been screwing up for years, Commander. Something like that might be nice._ She was tempted to make a face at his back. Anderson just rolled his eyes at her with a grin as he followed the Ambassador to the exit. 

Hearing a rumbling purr behind her, she turned to almost face plant into Garrus keel plate. Barking a laugh, she looked up...and up. _Tall._ His eyes gleamed with the same excitement that she was sure showed in hers. In a flash, armored arms pulled her from the floor, spinning her around before seeming to come to his senses, putting her back on her feet and ducked his head in embarrassment. 

"Wheee..." She stumbled a bit with a laugh "What was that for ya goof?"

"You actually did it, Shepard." Raising his head, Garrus was smiling so widely that Shepard thought he might lose his mandibles in a second. "I've never seen anyone change their minds about anything!" 

Tali chuckled behind them.

"Now that looked funny! First human Spectre, spun around like a kid by some weird turian. Think the cameras caught that one Commander?" 

Discreetly looking around, she noticed a few nearby glaring in disapproval, especially the turians she could see. Honestly though, she didn't care. This was a huge victory for all three of them and she wasn't going to let them ruin it.

"Well, I sure hope so! That ceremony might have been boring otherwise." Laughing, she waved at them follow as she went to leave. "We still need to catch this guy! You guys coming?"

"No red tape and getting to follow a Spectre! Just try and stop me!" Garrus was already going past her at a trot, long legs leaving her behind with Tali as Tali looked at her hands, twiddling her fingers nervously. Looking at her sideways through her visor, Tali seemed reluctant to speak.

"Tali, you don't have to come." Laying her hand on her new friend's shoulder, she smiled sadly. "I know you probably have other obligations with the Flotilla."

"NO! I want to come, it's just..." Looking down at her fingers, she hesitated "You really want a quarian?"

Shepard sighed, sad that Tali had been made to doubt herself so much. Reaching, she grabbed her hands, stopping her fidgeting.

"Tali, you're brave, smart, resourceful, and my friend....I would LOVE for you to come."

Her eyes crinkled in joy "Then I'll come too"

"TOO SLOW!"

Garrus shout echoed from below, where he was waiting at the next flight as Shepard rolled her eyes and made a face, making Tali laugh.

"We're coming ya great DUNDER HEAD!"

"What?!"

"Nothing, STUPID!"

Laughing, they ran to the elevator, leaving the Council Chambers behind.

.....

Shepard dismissed them shortly after of course.

"This will probably be a long mission. Get what you need and have it ready to be sent to the dock when we know what ship we're leaving on."

Both of her companions nodded, leaving her to make arrangements. Alone for the first time in a while, she sighed as she felt some of her stress melt away. The first part was done. Saren was ahead, but they were finally making real progress. Now for the rest. Following memory, she headed for the wards to do some preparing herself. If she was going to have a Turian and a Quarian on board, she would need to get some supplies to make sure they were covered as well as her human crew. Remembering the market place they'd passed yesterday, she wandered that way.

It took a little while, and reluctantly asking advice from a turian in the market to find what she needed. The reddish male had huffed his annoyance at being stopped by this presumptuous human until she'd mentioned what she was looking for. Smiling cautiously at this human, who was thoughtful enough to be purchasing food supplies for someone completely different from herself, he directed her to a shop called Galactic Gourmet, or something similar, on the other end of the market. Supposedly they sold cooking supplies and ingredients for every race. Thanking him politely, she smiled and left, meandering that direction as she looked around her in awe. 

So many amazing things here. She stopped to look at a stall selling street food for all races, wrinkling her nose at the strange things for each one. Were those candied bugs for Salarians? She wasn't sure about that one. The turian snacks were even stranger. That one looked like it might still be moving, all weird silver spines. It looked a little like a hedgehog, but asking about it, the Salarian shopkeep picked it up with a chuckle and showed it wasn't an animal at all, but one of the strangest fruits she had ever seen! Thanking him, she wandered further, window shopping as she went. Weapons and armor, though she had access to better Spectre gear now, clothes in bright colors and every style, even a pet store. She looked through the window at the displays of small mouse like creatures with scales instead of fur and in every color of the rainbow. Apparently they were called Kriann, native from the Salarian home world of Surkesh. She giggled, presenting her finger to a small pink one with blue markings as it seemed to watch her thoughtfully, small ears twitching before hopping away.

As she strolled further, she paused again, drawn by something displayed in a trendy tourist shop. Supposedly they sold gifts for every race. _And probably are priced to match._ She bit her lip nervously, glancing around before looking back at what had drawn her eye. _Well...it won't hurt to just look, right?_ Smiling to herself, she entered the store and started to wander, looking at the items they had on display. Most were pretty cliché and some rather interestingly named. Ice spheres, she laughed as she picked up one with the Citadel in it and swirled the snow around. Of course, every tourist shop had to have snow globes, but the change of name was amusing. Possibly a translator glitch?

Still, she was drawn to what first caught her eye. Glancing around again, she thought she saw movement outside the front, but it was a market, so there were people walking. Removing her gauntlets, she lifted it off the shelf to hold it gently. So soft! She chewed her lip, as she considered. It wasn't something she would usually allow herself, but she would have her own ship now, so her own cabin, right? Maybe she shouldn't, but it was so cute and soft. She'd always wanted one when she was a kid, but hadn't been allowed. Still, nobody else had to know she had it. Smiling softly, she looked around to make sure no one else had entered before tucking it against her side and walking to the register. _Just buying something, it's completely normal for me to get this. Not weird at all._ She wasn't convincing herself and the cashier wasn't helping. The Asari looked at her purchase, then back at her in her heavy armor, and back at the item before shrugging and ringing it up.

"Is there any way I can have it put in a box? It's uuuh...it's a gift"

She looked at Shepard again, cocking an eyebrow, before pulling a large plain box from behind the counter and placing it inside. Then, smiling, bid her good day as she left, her secret prize clutched to her.

.....

Garrus had entered the markets looking for a new scope for his rifle, but found Commander Shepard instead. Watching curiously as she roamed, he chuckled as she played with the Kriann at the pet store _Strange little things, those._ and eventually moved on before pausing at one of the more trendy tourist shops. He cocked his head in curiosity, but paused when he saw her face. She looked a little sad, but not quite. Was that what wistful looked like on a human? Their expressions were sometimes so different, but sometimes so similar too. He wasn't so good with human expressions, but hopefully he would get better. She glanced around her nervously, making him want to duck, before entering the store. What was she doing?

Wanting to know what caught her attention so much, he stepped closer, watching through the window as she browsed. He laughed with her as she picked up one of those strange human Ice Sphere things that all the tourist traps now had, but then she had that look in her eyes, not quite sad, but almost. Humming thoughtfully, he watched as she approached a display of what he thought were children's things, glancing almost directly at him as she looked towards the entrance. He ducked to the side, not wanting her to spot him. _Is she trying to steal something? I hope not._

Peeking around, he watched suspiciously as she pulled a toy down. His chirp of surprise as she held its soft body to herself drew a couple of strange glances from turians going past, but it was such an odd seeming choice for her. He waited as she tucked it against her, almost completely out of sight as she, almost too calmly he noted with a chuckle, walked to the register. He breathed a sigh. Not stealing, just acting strangely. She paid for the strange item, drawing an odd glance from the Asari running the place. It did seem a very unusual purchase for a woman in heavy armor, but she didn't comment on it. She probably didn't even care what a person bought, as long as they were paying for it. Shepard had them put it into a plain box for her and started to leave, not yet spotting him behind her. Sneaking up, he leaned close with a mischievous smirk.

"What are you doing, Shepard?"

Her squeak of surprise as she whipped around was completely worth it. The fact the she immediately thrust the box behind her, still completely visible he noticed with a smile, just confirmed that it was something she would rather crew not know about.

"N..nothing" She squeaked.

"You sure?" Turning his head to look at her through one eye in amusement, he reached behind her to tap the box. "Doesn't look like it. That's pretty big for nothing, Shepard"

"Just....supplies!" He watched in amusement as her face began to change color. Humans blushed rather nicely it seemed.

"Uh huh..." Snatching the box with a laugh, he jumped back a pace, holding it away from her. “Then you won’t mind if I take a peek hmmmm.” 

“Give it back Garrus.”

“In a second.” His teasing subharmonics definitely drew a few disapproving looks, but he didn’t mind.

Pulling the box open, a pair of deep green eyes stared unblinking up at him from a round whiskered face with pointed ears. As he touched the plaything’s fur, obviously silky soft even through his gloves, he let out a deep thrumm of pleasure.

“You...you like it?” Shepard reached for the box reluctantly and he passed it back.

“It’s cute. Surprising, but cute.” Cocking his head at the small, fluffy thing he had to ask “What is it?”

Shepard petted it’s silky, black fur for a moment before reluctantly closing the lid. “It’s a cat. I know I can’t have a real one with the dangerous stuff we’re probably doing, and it’s not something I would usually allow myself since I don’t want everyone to know that I like such things, but if I’m getting my own ship, I’ll get my own cabin right? So only I would know.” Looking sideways at him in suspicion, she added “and you now.” He chuckled.

“I won’t tell anyone your deep, dark secret, Shep. It’s safe with me.”

“Good.” Pausing, she considered “I was coming here to buy food for you and Tali. Would you like to come, too.”

Surprised at both the offer and her consideration, he nodded before gesturing her to lead on.

“Absolutely Commander. Thanks for thinking about us.”

Shifting the box to one arm, she took his hand, squeezing it as she smiled up at him.

“You guys are my crew, even my friends, of course I considered you. You realize that you’re stuck with me now, though.”

Laughing, he followed her away from the shop.

“Sounds good to me”

"I think you're almost as strange as me." She smiled over her shoulder at him. "What were you doing there anyway?"

He shrugged, a human gesture he picked up from his coworkers at C-Sec.

"I figured I needed a new scope for my rifle before we left, but was distracted when I saw you here."

"Well we can do that too."

The shop he needed wasn't far from where they were. It was part way through looking at different mods for his rifle and chuckling as Shepard ooh and awed over different weapons that he realized. 

He was actually having fun. 

When was the last time he had just had fun? Usually things like this were just chores to finish and then go home. He couldn't remember a time he'd had anybody even somewhat resembling a true friend, someone to just....have fun with.

Leaving that shop, his new mod in hand, he mulled it over as he watched her explore further. It was such a strange feeling. He had coworkers, family, people that his father wanted him to spend time with...and then Shepard. She was in a clan all of her own.

He watched laughing as she window shopped outside of so many stores. She seemed to be determined to see everything. It took them ages to get to the actual food store she had been going to, but he wasn't bored for a single minute of it.

Entering the store, a dark plated turian with white markings welcomed them, asking what he could help with. When Shepard explained what she was looking for, he seemed doubtful and his subharmonics thrummed with it. Seeing Garrus with her, he chirruped questioningly, but Garrus just nodded, confirming what Shepard had said.

"Hmmm...It's not often I see humans buying supplies for turians, definitely not for quarians." Hearing Garrus's confirming rumble, the Turian smiled at them. "I'm certain I can help though."

....

Shepard was pretty sure she was missing half of this conversation. She couldn't really understand what they were saying to each other, but even with the tones she couldn’t hear, the two were just close enough that she felt them. It was like her ears were determinedly telling her there was a noise, but just not giving her sound for it, leaving her with a hair raising sensation that raised goose bumps on her skin. 

"Well, that's why I brought my soon to be resident turian with me. He'll know better than me what will do well and what won't." She patted Garrus on the arm.

Together, they looked at some of the things he had. She was fascinated as she watched Garrus order basic foodstuff. A lot of it was dried goods, which would last longer on board. Sort of like humans order rice and beans. She noticed that meat was much more prominent in their diets, but glancing at their teeth, she figured that would make sense. He also asked about fresh foods and was shown the types of produce they had on stock.

"Hey! I saw one of those earlier."

Garrus picked up the weird hedge-fruit and handed it to her between two large talons. 

"It's a Hrukith. They're a small vine like plant native to not far from where I grew up."

Holding it carefully, she poked at the silver spines, finding them not nearly as sharp as she would have thought and slightly flexible. 

"Are they good raw? Or do they have to be prepared somehow?"

"Just peeled" He looked at her strangely. "Why?"

"I want to try one."

Garrus barked a laugh, but paused as she just looked at him.

"Wait, you're serious? What about the allergy you humans have to dextro?"

She added an extra of the fruits to their fairly large order with a chuckle.

"Don't believe everything you hear Garrus. It's a myth, an urban legend." He cocked his head, obviously confused. Considering his expression, she had to admit that the more she watched him, the more bird like mannerisms she saw. No wonder some people called them Birds. It was supposed to be insulting, but seemed fairly accurate.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, some people can have a fairly bad allergy, but it's actually pretty rare. Unfortunately, our first two delegates after the First Contact War ended both had it. They both had severe reactions to food served and it became a well known, but untrue, fact that humans are horribly allergic to your food. Even most humans believe it and are scared to try anything, but it's just like any other allergy. Some of us are, most of us aren't, and the ones that are have differing severities." Smiling, she picked up the fruit and, sliding her knife free of the disguised sheath on the greaves of her armor, sliced off a piece and tossed it in her mouth. "I just happen to be one of the ones who has no reaction whatsoever." She mumbled around it before making a face "That is really sweet though!" 

The shopkeep hummed thoughtfully "Learn new things all the time I guess."

Garrus looked shocked, but then most people were upon finding out that humans actually weren't usually allergic. It was just so well known that nobody considered the absurdity that one race would be allergic, but others wouldn’t. 

"Wait, how did you find out you weren't."

She shrugged. "I was young and hungry. I was tested eventually, but it only proved what I already knew. Of course, dextro may fill a stomach, but it doesn't have any nutritional value for levo people." With that she offered the rest of the fruit to Garrus and began haggling prices on the supplies they had purchased.

Coming to an agreement, the turian agreed to hold the supplies, having them sent to their dock later, and they left the store. 

"I guess we better get back with...."

"WOW! Commander Shepard?!"

She turned at the shout, seeing a blond man running towards them excitedly. _Great. What does this one want?_ He ran right up to her, even invading her space, standing far closer than she was honestly comfortable with. The guy wasn’t anything extraordinary; taller than her, but not by much, average weight, hair, just some guy.....so....why was she nervous? She swallowed tightly as he rattled on with his hero worship. Any other time it would have just been embarrassing, now? _Shit, shit, shit...Not NOW!_ She mentally groaned. Garrus was freaking standing right there! Great, one of the first things he’d see his new Commander do was totally freak out over nothing. Awesome. The guy continued on, but his actual words faded, background noise to her rising sense of danger. _Calm the freak down brain! The guy is fine! I just faced geth, zombies, mercs, but you’re going to do this NOW!_ But her instincts wouldn’t listen, just running a worn track in her mind, screaming danger no matter how she tried to breathe, relax, calm herself. _Shit!_ Something about asking for an autograph worked through the meaningless babble she was hearing. Shepard forced a smile, hoping it was halfway convincing, and reached for the pad he held out, trying to force her hand not to shake.

.....

"WOW! I'm Conrad, Conrad Verner. I'm your biggest fan!"

Garrus rumbled in amusement as this short, bland human male just marched right up and started blathering like a star struck idiot, ignoring him completely, an impressive feat considering he was right there and had an extra head on the moron. He hadn’t realized Shepard had FANS. The amount he was going to be able to tease her with this later. 

"Can I get your autograph?!" Garrus started to chuckle at the pyjak’s ridiculous enthusiasm, but froze in surprise, rumble stuttering to a stop. Was Shepard....? Opening his mouth a little, he took a deeper breath, cool air running over the roof of his mouth. If it weren't for his good sense of smell, he might have missed it, but....

Shepard was scared. 

Looking at this strange man in confusion with a worried grumble, Garrus couldn't see anything wrong with him. His C-Sec training and instincts immediately dismissed him as dim, but harmless. Still, the faint scent of fear was in the air, not just fear, but Shepard’s fear. Her scent markers were woven all through it, leaving no doubt. A glance showed that to the untrained eye she looked fine, but her smile as she reached for the pad was tight, unnaturally forced, fingers trembling slightly before firming and grasping the thing. Still, she shifted the box she had been carrying to one arm and took the pad he held out, signing and going to hand it back.

Garrus didn't understand it, but he did not like this man one bit. He was standing too close and, though he didn't know why, was making Shepard very nervous. He stepped up behind her, straightening to his full height and giving a barely audible rumble. 

Conrad stepped even closer and grabbed Shepard's arm in his excitement.

....

As Conrad grabbed her arm, Shepard’s panic spiked, brain throwing everything into one thought, racing through again and again as she fought herself. _Run run run run run run run._ She pulled air in, desperately trying to contain her fear, but knew she was fighting a losing battle. She would have to move...and soon, but how to do it without making it obvious?

As she fought with herself, suddenly Garrus was right there. A growl of threat worked its way through her mindless panic, bringing her eyes to him. If that wasn’t a threat display, she didn’t know a thing. He was somehow taller, head tilted down to bring his spiny fringe more into profile, the spines even seeming slightly raised be more prominent as he flexed his talons and glared at the man from under lowered brow plates. _What is he doing?!_ Still Conrad didn’t let go. Her momentary distraction was quickly overwhelmed by the panic trying to take over again. Shepard finally took a step back, but merely pulled the idiot with her as his hand didn’t let go. _Danger danger danger RUN!_ Shepard’s fingers tightened on the box, denting it with the effort to not let go to the panic in her mind.

A snarl ripped the air by her ear, feral, loud, and utterly terrifying...to Verner.

Her own panic derailed in shock as Garrus took a step forward, mandibles lowered as he bared his teeth and SNARLED at the man, talons flexing in obvious threat. 

The poor little idiot bolted like a scared rabbit.

She let out a breath as the source of her tension disappeared around a corner, and crashed. The danger, real or imagined, gave her a huge adrenaline high. With the source now gone, she started to shake, barely noticing Garrus’s worried grumble as he looked her in the eye.

“Shepard?” Strong talons gripped her shoulder, but still she trembled, unable to stop. She gave him a weak smile. 

"Just...just give me a second."

He blinked, nodding in acceptance before glancing around. His hand released her, instead reaching towards her own in invitation. As she cautiously accepted, he tugged her forward, leading her somewhere. She wasn’t especially surprised to zone out for a moment, coming to herself as he nudged down on her shoulder to push her into a seat. He’d led her away from the more crowded stalls, to a bench tucked back in a corner, the rush and babble of people far enough to almost be calming instead of panic inducing. He didn’t say anything yet, just held her hand loosely in his as they sat, letting go easily as soon as she pulled away. She shifted her package, grappling with the lid for a moment, trembling fingers not gripping properly before taloned ones nudged hers to the side, easily popping it open for her. A rumbling purr reverberated in their small space, helping her breathe deeply as she stroked the cat’s plush, silky fur, slowly coming back down.

"Are you okay?" Garrus’s deep rumble sounded nearly in her ear. She nodded, eyes still fixed on the ground in front of her.

"I will be. I just need a couple of minutes."

She could feel his eyes on her as she breathed, relaxing her muscles as the trembling slowed, breathing deeper and easier, still stroking the toy’s fur, using the sensation against her fingers and Garrus’s loud rumble to further anchor herself. Finally able to think properly, her hand stilled, mind clear enough for doubt to creep in. 

_What will he think of me now?_

....

Garrus watched in confusion, keeping the same soothing rumble going as the smell of her panic began to fade, her fingers steadying in their path through that thing’s hair as she finally calmed. 

"What was that?" He had a suspicion, but he’d never seen such a condition in a human before. The fear was similar, but the physical reactions to it....

"Sorry, Garrus. It's embarrassing." She kept her eyes on the cat, not even meeting his gaze. "I...I get panic attacks sometimes. It's really embarrassing and completely irrational, so I try not to let people know when I'm starting to freak out."

"Panic attacks? What triggered this one?"

"He was too close, too focused. I don't get them often anymore, but I usually get them when I get overcrowded by people, especially men."

Cocking his head, he thought carefully. He didn't remember smelling that on her before, but....

"Do I make you nervous, Shepard?" 

Her head jerked up, eyes meeting his. Her eyes were a very pretty blue he noticed, even brighter than his own, and sad. 

"No! I'm not sure why. It's not because you're an alien. I can have them with anyone, regardless of race. Humans are more common of course, but..." She seemed to consider for a moment before continuing. "You don't feel the same to me. You feel....safe." She smiled up at him. Garrus gave an amused grumble, flaring mandibles in a small smile as he poked her with a talon.

“Fangs, talons, and all hmmm?” Shepard gave a small laugh at that.

"People can hurt each other just fine without them, so...yeah. Sorry for the trouble and for ruining everything."

Taking her hand in his, he shook his head.

"It was no trouble and you didn't ruin anything, I just wanted to make sure you were alright. Turians get such things too, though it looks different on a human. It’s not common, but it does happen.” Her shocked glance made him chuckle. “We’re a military race, Shepard. Things happen. People get hurt, physically and mentally. Don’t worry about messing up the afternoon. The day's nowhere near over yet and one bad moment won't screw up a whole day. Take your time." 

Shepard was obviously surprised at that, though he didn’t know why.

“Just because we’re armored on the outside, doesn’t mean we are on the inside too, Shepard.” She chuckled, finally giving a genuine smile as she nodded in understanding. Closed the lid on the box, she shifted to her feet, apparently ready to leave.

"Come on, let’s go check with Udina and see if he has any news."

His subharmonics sang sadly as he watched her, lost in thought for a moment before blinking and moving to follow.

_What happened to you to wound so deeply?_

_Who broke you, Shepard?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, Conrad always freaked me out a bit. If any guy was going to trigger her, it would be him. And for anyone who doesn't get them, panic attacks are often hard or even impossible to explain. The fear can be completely irrational, but knowing that doesn't end it. So you try to hide and not let people know because it feels weak and stupid. A simple statement, a person's appearance, a situation, sometimes you don't even know. There is so much advice on how to help a person panicking, but it really depends on the person. Sometimes we just need you to sit back, don't harrass, just back up and wait for it to pass. For goodness sakes don't hug them. Unless they've told you it helps, it may make it worse. Dumbest advice I've ever seen.


	10. Nothing is what you expect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Udina did WHAT?! Still, as much as Shepard despises how it happened, the chance to be captain of a ship like the Normandy is something she's not going to pass up in a million years. Stinks about Anderson though.

"Wait...You WHAT!?" She glared at Udina, daring him to say it again as she held back the overwhelming urge to punch his smug ugly mug.

"Captain Anderson has been removed from command. You are now in command of the Normandy." Nope, he said it again. Shepard growled in frustration, a noise that made Garrus twitch, chirping in surprise behind her. Looking to Anderson, her expression softened.

"Anderson...." She looked at her feet, considering. "This isn't what I wanted. Sure, I wished I could be Captain of the Normandy, or a ship like her, but not like this."

He stepped closer, laying his hand on her shoulder and, raising her head, she met his eyes. The pride in his gaze seemed to eclipse any regret he may have felt.

"Shepard, you needed a ship. If you're to be fighting the worst there is, then you need the best. Is this the way I planned it?" He shrugged. "Honestly, no...but you need the best and the Normandy is the best ever made. And really, how were you going to be a big 'in command' Spectre with your old Captain looking over your shoulder all the time? Take her and use her well. I'm sure I'll find something to occupy my unexpected retirement to pencil pusher."

Looking up into his face, she realized again just why she loved this old guy. She straightened to attention with a salute, eyes damp. He returned it before holding out his hand. As she took it, he surprised her, yanking her into a hug and resting his cheek on the top of her head as she slowly returned the embrace. 

"I can do that now that you're technically a Spectre instead of Alliance." He chuckled, letting go and raising her chin to meet her eyes with a sad smile. "Fly far....fly free. Just don't forget to save the rest of us old fools while you're at it." She smiled, but of course it couldn’t last. Udina’s grating voice cut into the moment, bringing her brows together in consternation at the idiot. 

"Anderson, come with me while we get everything finished here. Commander Shepard, your ship will be ready to disembark shortly. Word is that Matriarch Benezia has a daughter, a Doctor T’soni, currently working as an archeologist on Prothean digs in the Artemis Tau cluster. There are also reports of Geth on Feros and Noveria. I will send you any further information. Complete your mission Commander, and try not to make my job harder on the way!"

Anderson rolled his eyes at her and grimaced, making Shepard snort as she tried to hold back a laugh. Then he turned, following Udina out. Hearing a faint chuckle, she turned to glare at Garrus behind her, and laughed. He did look a little silly, standing next to the door with her box still in his hands, trying to look unnoticeable as tall turian possibly could, and failing.

"Well that was unexpected." His mandibles flared. "Sooo, you and the Captain, huh?" 

She shoved his shoulder.

"Shut up! At least I know the ship we're going to be on, and the crew." She pulled up her omnitool, typing out a message. "And I can let Tali and Wrex know where to meet us. You're still coming aren't you?" She paused, glancing at him nervously.

"Shepard!" His shove rocked her sideways as he shook his head at her apparently silly question. "I told you before, just try and stop me." 

"Well FINE!" Snatching her box from him, she pushed him out the door ahead of her, laughing as he leaned back against the motion. "Go on then. You need to finish whatever you need to do with your boss and get your own stuff together. Meet me at the docks when you're done." She transferred their dock number to his tool so he could find it, already jogging that way herself.

.....

"So Commander...." Joker looked up from his seat as she approached. "When you told me to expect a krogan, I thought you were joking. Just make sure he doesn't accidentally step on me or something."

"Pretty sure he doesn't want to be scraping you off his boots anyway, Joker" Glancing to her omnitool, she looked through her messages for any news from Garrus or Tali.

"What was in that box you brought?"

"Supplies....Speaking of,” She reached over his headrest to flip that hat off his head, placing it on her own again as he protested. “that’s mine. So Wrex has gotten here, what about a quarian and a turian?"

Her pilot glared up at her for a moment, finally surrendering with a sigh and shaking his head in answer.

"Nope, neither of them yet. If we're getting them too, I'm not sure if we'll be a floating zoo or material for the best reality show ever." Glancing up at her from his consoles, he couldn't resist "Supplies? We already received supplies sent to the ship a little bit ago."

"Personal supplies, Joker." She glared at him as she scrolled through her messages. Chakwas had put in a requisitions request for their new crew mates. Different races, different medical needs, if krogan needed anything medical at all. _I’ll have to ask._ She sent approval and asked for a time frame for when they would arrive. Ah! There was a message from Garrus saying he was almost finished with C-sec. Nothing from Tali though. _Hmmmm...hope she didn't change her mind. She's young, but would be handy to have around._

"You got the latest Fornax didn't you? I hope you're going to share."

"Gee Joker. I didn't know you had a thing for Hanar. Or was it elcor this month? I guess hanar nudes don't make much sense seeing as they're always naked and just hanging out, but I'm sure some people would buy it."

"What?! Hanging out...what are you talking about?"

Seeing someone approaching the airlock on the camera feeds behind him, she winked with a sly grin.

"Ask Tali, she knows"

"Tali?" He whipped back to the feeds as the airlock began its decontamination cycle, before opening to let Tali onboard. 

"Permission to come aboard, Shepard."

"Most certainly granted, Tali. I thought you might not make it."

"I wouldn't miss it for anything Shepard. I was held up by some jerk who thought I'd stolen his credit chit. Took C-sec FOREVER to straighten him out." She shook her head in exasperation before shrugging. "Pretty typical unfortunately. Am I the last one?"

"Nope, Garrus is the snail this time."

"Snail?"

"Eh?...Oh, tiny, extremely slow moving earth bug. They can be pretty interesting actually, but very slowly."

"HELLO! Hanar hanging out?! What were you talking about?" Joker was watching them talk with an exasperated expression. Shepard clapped Tali on the shoulder as she went to exit the Normandy again.

"This one's on you Tali, have fun."

"WHAT!? NO SHEPARD! Keelah, not Hanar stuff again!"

The door to the airlock was already closing between them as she leaned to the side, shouting back.

"What!? I can't hear you through the...." The door sealed between them. With a chuckle, she turned and stepped back onto the dock, waiting for Garrus to make his appearance.

She stepped back, admiring the lines of the ship again, this time in the light of the Serpent Nebula. Beautiful.

"Hmmmm...this is the ship he gave you? Impressive."

Shepard jumped as Garrus leaned over her shoulder with a rumbling purr.

"Damn it, Garrus!" She smacked his arm as he chuckled. "How do you do that?!"

"What Shepard?" His mandibles flared in a smug grin "Did I scare you?"

"I don't even know how you sneak up on me like that. Usually I can tell." She looked him up and down "Plus, it's not right for someone your size to be so quiet."

He turned his head, staring at her with one mirthful eye, before nodding his head back to the Normandy. 

"Oh, yeah. That's her. Isn't she amazing?"

He turned to trace the lines of the ship with his gaze, mandibles slowly flicking in what she took to be pleasure before nodding.

"Makes me think of a Shatha."

"A what!?"

Stepping past her, he stroked the hull with a talon, cocking his head to listen to the ship's engines hum.

"Hmmmm...even sounds like one on the lower pulses." He purred, making Shepard chuckle. He sounded like a giant cat. "A Shatha. Big, sleek, fast, " Meeting her eyes, he smirked "and absolutely deadly. Think her guns meet up to the image?"

Shrugging, she stepped past him into the airlock and waving for him to come aboard.

"Well, she's turian-human hybrid, so I'm sure she meets turian standards. You know I'll have to see a picture sometime, right?" He blinked.

"I'm sure you could look one up, though there aren't many good ones. Shatha are surprisingly sneaky for their size. Turian and human? Now I'm really curious to find out how it measures up." 

She stepped back onto the bridge to Tali still standing awkwardly, twiddling her fingers and Joker looking very frustrated.

"Anyone else we're missing Joker?"

"No ma'am. Are you ever going to tell me the Hanar thing?" 

She made a show of considering for a moment, tapping a finger against her chin thoughtfully, and shook her head.

"Nope. Look it up." 

"Fine!" Joker threw his hands up, exasperated. “Can I at least have my HAT BACK NOW?!”

"Hmmmm...No. Hey, where did Wrex go anyway?"

"Argh! I think he's set up in the Cargo bay!" She would have been worried, but the twitch of his lips into a small grin gave him away. She wouldn’t ever bully; however, teasing was fair game. She nodded, turning to leave, but stopped as Joker spoke, his voice softer. He looked grim as he glanced back at her. "Sorry about Anderson by the way, Shepard. I know you looked up to him."

"Yeah. It feels wrong to take his ship like this."

"Just, none of us blame you. Still, be careful. If they can remove him on a whim, what else will they decide to do?"

She nodded.

"Yeah, I hear you. Well, I think this T'soni is the best place to start. Plot a course for the Artemis Tau cluster and prepare for undocking. The jerk couldn't tell us exactly where the dig is, so we'll just have to look for it." Considering for a moment, she added "Still, we don't have to check EVERY world. If Protheans lived there fifty thousand years ago, then it should be in, or very near, the Goldilocks Zone. That will help to restrict how much searching we have to do. Set a course and get us there Joker."

"Aye aye, Commander."

As Joker began getting the ship ready to depart, Shepard motioned to Tali and Garrus to follow as she left the bridge. 

"Come on, we'll see about getting you set up. Though," Shep paused, glaring at them with exaggerated suspicion. "I hope you guys know that I don't accept slackers on my ship. We'll need to find you some kind of work for in-transit periods."

Tali laughed 

"Shepard, I doubt you could give me near as much work as a Quarian Captain would. They keep us quite busy."

"Goldilocks Zone?" Garrus looked at her in confusion.

"Oh sorry. It's a popular human term for the habitable zone. There was an old children's tale about some girl named Goldilocks." Shepard chuckled "Yet another example of how weird our children's stories can be. Goldilocks broke into some family's house and tried all their stuff. Part of it was trying their food. One bowl is too hot, one too cold, and one the perfect temperature. The zone in a star system where it's cool enough that water doesn't boil off, but still hot enough that it doesn't freeze solid, the habitable zone, ended up being nicknamed the Goldilocks zone for us humans. The zone best suited for a world to have life. The Protheans lived on the world we're looking for fifty thousand years ago. Planets can drift some, but it should still be in that zone." Considering for a moment, she shrugged "Supposedly"

Tali and Garrus stared at her, wide eyed.

"Wait," Tali blinked behind her visor "You're telling me that people told stories about some girl breaking into a person's home and helping themselves to their stuff? Why?!"

Shepard gave an evil smile.

"Remind me to introduce you to some of the original Grimm fairy tales. Now those get ugly."

"I'm not sure how much uglier they can get than Turian bedtime stories." Garrus flared his mandibles, baring his teeth at her. " When you're born with the teeth and talons of a predator, they can get pretty nasty. Of course, you don't know that's unusual when you're small."

"I wonder what krogan tell their kids." She shuddered "Maybe I don't want to know."

As they walked through the CIC on their way through the ship, she saw crew members watch curiously. Quarians at least were relatively uncommon, and even seeing a turian on an Alliance ship had to be odd. Most of them looked just curious, though she caught a few hateful glances. Pressly was the one that surprised her most. She'd have to have a talk with him later. Seeing her glare at the worst offenders, Garrus nudged her shoulder. 

"Shepard, don't worry about it. I worked for C-sec, remember. If they don't hate me cause I'm not human, plenty hate me cause I'm a cop. Nobody likes being pulled aside by police. I'm used to it."

Watching curiously, Tali's eyes widened as she realized what Garrus was talking about.

"Seriously Shepard, he's not kidding. Everyone hates quarians almost. This is nothing new."

She shook her head before answering, making sure to be loud enough for anyone nearby to hear.

"That may be on the Citadel, but I won't have it here. You two, and Wrex, and ANYONE ELSE we may pick up, are just as good as any human. Anybody who doesn't like it can get off! My ship, my rules."

The few crew who had been glaring quickly looked back to their work, ignoring them as they passed through.

"Now," Shepard's voice was more cheerful as she looked to both of them. "We need to find where to put you on the duty rosters." Pausing for a moment in thought, she looked to Tali. "Not to sound like I'm generalizing here, but is it true that quarians make the best engineers?"

"Most of the time, yes! Our lives depend on being able to maintain and repair what we have with the minimum of resources without losing stability. It makes most quarians VERY good mechanics and engineers, though there are always a few who aren't." She stopped for a moment, eyes glowing a bit brighter "And I'm actually better than most as an engineer."

"Awesome! I'll introduce you to our head engineer, Adams. He always can use an extra set of hands. Especially with how experimental our drive is."

Tali practically danced in her excitement, almost skipping as Shepard pressed the button to summon the elevator. 

"What about you Garrus? What do you do?"

He shrugged, or attempted to. It was a bit awkward to see from a turian.

"Well, I figure you don't need a security officer on ship, and a sniper is even less useful during downtime between missions." Ducking his head as he thought, he glanced up. "Turian military has the same practice. I was sniper on the ground, but in between missions I worked as a mechanic and helped keep up the vehicles."

Shepard sighed in relief as they stepped in and began to descend. He cocked his head at her curiously.

"Well," she explained "that was a little bit of a worry I hadn't considered yet. We have some people who can do some work on the Mako, but our main mechanic was a young Corporal who was unfortunately killed on Eden Prime. It was such a shock and it's been such a short amount of time that I hadn't thought to find anyone to replace him yet. It's one of the main reasons he was with us in the first place. He was young, but great with the machines."

Garrus gave a low thrumm. Shepard couldn't quite hear it, but again was close enough that she could actually feel it. Even unable to truly understand what he was saying, she found the vibration comforting. 

"Sorry, I know that's hard. A Mako, though? I'll want to look for a while, but it shouldn't be a problem." Looking at his talons, he flexed them and glanced at her own hands. "I may need to get some turian sized tools though. Your hands are tiny!"

"Compared to yours, I'd say so." She held up her own hand and glanced at his in comparison. "Go ahead and have them sent. We're still waiting for a last few supplies for the Doc anyway." 

Finally reaching the cargo bay, the doors opened with a hiss. Garrus cocked his head, looking at their ground vehicle. It was far different from any turian versions. He looked to Commander Shepard, mandibles flicking in excitement at the chance to look it over. Seeing his hopeful expression, she chuckled. For a member of such a large and supposed intimidating species, he sure managed to look like an awkward puppy sometimes.

"Oh go on, play with your new toy. Just make sure she's back in one piece before we need her."

Tali shook her head as he nodded and wandered off.

"Males! It doesn't matter the species, give them something to tinker and take apart and their happy."

Shepard just smiled and leaned closer to whisper in her ear.

"That's what he thinks now, but for all that they named it after a graceful predator, it handles like a mule. He'll probably be sick of it after the first couple of missions." Standing straight, she motioned to the side towards an entrance Tali hadn't noticed yet. "Come on, you're going to be back here. I think you'll like this even more than he liked his job."

Shepard walked through, hearing Tali follow behind. 

"ADAMS! I BROUGHT YOU A NEW SET OF HANDS!"

There was a bang and a muffled curse from under one of the panels. Shepard chuckled as he shuffled from where he'd been working and jerked upright, giving a quick salute before wincing and rubbing a hand over his short, dark hair.

"Commander! Ow...I wasn't expecting you. A new set of hands you say?"

Shepard turned around and realized that Tali hadn't followed her over. She was still standing in the doorway, staring in awe at the Normandy's engine. She shook her head with a chuckle.

"Just a sec. I seem to have left her behind."

He nodded as she walked back, laying a hand on Tali's shoulder and making her twitch in surprise. 

"What was that earlier?" she leaned against her shoulder with a grin "Hmmm...Something about 'males and their toys' I believe."

Tali pushed her off.

"Alright. Maybe not just males. You're really going to let me work in here Shepard? This is way more advanced that any Flotilla drive core."

"Will it be a problem?" Shepard was worried for a moment, but Tali just waved it off with a laugh.

"Are you kidding?! Of course not...but most people don't like to let a quarian near anything even half this sensitive." Tali looked at her for a moment, eyes wide. "You really don't care, do you?" Shepard took her hand and shook her head.

"Not even a little. As long as Adams likes you and you get along, then it's yours to tinker with. Now come meet the man."

As they walked back over, Adam's stared at her and for a moment Shepard thought this might be a bigger problem than she expected. Then his hard face broke into a broad smile.

"You brought me a quarian?" Speaking to Tali, he held out his hand, which she reluctantly took. "Ma'am, if you are even HALF as good as rumors say, then this must be my birthday."

Shepard could see Tali's eyes crinkle in her own large smile.

"I hope I don't disappoint. This drive core is amazing!"

"This is just the beginning. You haven't even taken a real look at the stealth systems yet."

"WHAT?! You guys have stealth?! I have to know how that works."  
At that point, they started talking so quickly about technical stuff that Shepard could feel her eyes starting to glaze over. After a few minutes, she gave up completely, patted Tali on the shoulder and shook her head. 

"OKAY! It looks like you're good here, and honestly you guys lost me after the first two sentences, so I'm going to get out. Is everything good for departure Adams? We'll be heading out soon."

Saluting again, he nodded.

"All good here, Commander. I'll make sure our new recruit gets settled in." Looking to Tali, he added "And, I know not everyone likes quarians as much as us in engineering, so if anybody gives you trouble, come to me. We'll get them straightened out in no time."

Tali grabbed Shepard's hands in hers before she could turn to leave.

"Thank you so much! This is better than I could ever imagine!"

Shepard laughed.

"Welcome aboard Tali. We'll keep you on your toes though. I don't think anything here is ever going to be what you expect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just had to mess with Tali some more. Everyone thinks she's so innocent, but is she? And we can talk about boys and their toys all day, but girls can be just as bad. XD 
> 
> Seriously though, can't do better if I don't know what ya think. Have advice? Send me a comment sometime, I'd love to hear from you.


	11. Secrets and Hidden Treasures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stupid beacon! Still, the night's not a complete loss. Shepard can't sleep, but she's not the only one awake.

_Peace_

Golden grass threaded softly through her fingertips. A warm spring breeze pulled at her hair. Fields as far as the eye could see, blending into a distant sunset sky. 

Shepard closed her eyes, breathing deeply. Hay, clean earth, wildflowers...life. A gentle smile crossed her face. 

_Calm_

The soft flutter of wings, hidden birds flitting through tall blades of grass, sweet melodies fill the silence. A thrumming heavy in the air, the invisible birds quieting to listen and she chuckled to herself. It sounded like Garrus's purr, soothing and kind.

Relaxing.

_So why wasn't she relaxed?_

She opened her eyes, worry invading her mind, creasing her brow. For all its peace, this place was....wrong.

_Where am I? What is this place?_

The birds stayed silent as the soft hum grew, shaking the very air it travelled. The ground shuddered, rocking under her feet, but still it grew. Shepard closed her eyes, pressing hands to her ears as it grew even louder, shattering the once peaceful place, but it was as loud in her mind as in the air. 

_Pain_

Crying out, she fell to her knees, eyes tearing as the horrible noise stabbed through her mind.

_Fire_

Everything was burning. People screamed as they ran. Always the fire followed. Always it hungered. Hot, dry air blew across her face. Her skin felt tight, hot, and tears of pain dried unshed as the noise grew still, invading her mind.

_Agony_

Everything hurt now. Her very muscles shrieked as the all consuming roar tore her very bones, but that was nothing compared to what she saw. She screamed in rage, helpless as people of all races cried out in pain and anguish. Spires filled the skyline, people wailing as their very skin seemed to melt, revealing the grey lifeless flesh underneath. _Save us!_ But she could only watch, tears pouring down her cheeks to dry instantly in the ever present heat. She struggled, but could not save them. She could no more move to help than Atlas under his weighty load. She covered her eyes. _No more! Please, NO MORE!_ But the images were within as well.

_Death_

Feeling the pressure on her skin, she ripped her hands from before her eyes, standing to look from the field in shock. An explosion, pressure in the air rippled across her as a vessel began to fall. The earth shook under her as it impacted, but no sound was heard except the never ending roar. The sky was filled with ships and all fled, but they could not flee fast enough. One by one, they fell, meteors that tore the sky and broke the very earth. The fields began to burn, tongues of flame consuming all in their path. Smoke, cloying and thick, obscured the sunset.

Over it all, a voice. Deeper and more terrible than she had ever known. Her head split as she screamed, but the voice roared over all.

_We are coming. You cannot stop us._

_You and everyone and everything you know will die._

_We are here._

......

“AAAH!”

The shout echoed from bare walls, ripping her from the remnants of her visions. Shepard jerked up, lungs burning as she gasped for air. _Trapped! Can't move!_ Flailing, she desperately tried to unbind herself, ripping damp sheets away, almost crashing to the floor in the process. Finally free, she sat on the edge of the bed, dragging cool air into her lungs as her pounding heart slowly calmed. The memory of searing heat faded and she started to shiver as her skin dried in the chill Normandy air.

With a groan, she dropped her aching head in her hands. 

Stupid beacon, she had enough problems sleeping without some malfunctioning piece of junk filling her head with a hundred years of 'death by the reapers highlights'. Well, after that, there was no way she was going back to sleep. Dragging herself out of bed, she walked to her desk and dropped herself into the chair. Might as well see how they were doing. Before leaving the Citadel, she'd done a little research and found several documents about prothean history that seemed to be written from finds in the Knossos system. If Liara wasn't there, prothean digs and people who worked them would be and maybe that could lead to her. Starting up her console, she waited impatiently as their current position updated. Although travel through relays was fast, travel through space was most definitely not. Quite a bit of being a soldier on a shipboard posting was downtime while traveling from one system to another. _In other words, boredom._ She hated the waiting.

A soft chime pulled Shepard's attention from her thoughts and back to the screen. She scoffed. She must not have slept long. They were still hours out and that was just to reach the system itself, not to actually find anything in it. She breathed out a sigh, dropping her head on her arms. _Ugh. Plus, it's night shift. Most of the crew is asleep._

She sat for a few moments, letting herself drift for a moment, but as soon as her eyes closed, she saw the visions again. Fire, pain, and death. That's all the beacon had given her. It wasn't even clear enough to help. 

_This isn't going to work._

Getting up, she riffled through her gear, pulling out a fresh set of clothes and her shower bag. Might as well get ready for the day. As she turned to leave, she paused, then grabbed her headphones too and headed for the door only to stumble before even reaching it, her foot catching something soft on the cold floor. She managed not to face plant and, having regained her balance, reached for what had tripped her.

"Bagheera" With a sigh, she ran her fingers over his soft fur, before placing the cat beside the bed, hidden from view from the door. "Some help you are cat." She must have thrown him while sleeping. It wasn't the first time something ended up on the other side of the room in the night. With a wide, jaw cracking yawn, Shepard left her quarters, headed for the showers. She peeked into the mess hall as she passed, but as she'd thought, nobody home. 

She smiled as she entered the bathroom. One of the benefits of being up at this hour, no fighting for hot water. There wasn't a single person in the showers except her. On a ship the size of the Normandy, not even the Captain had a private bathroom, so finding it empty like this was a nice treat. She sighed in relief, the hot water helping ease some of the aches from her rude awakening, pulling in the warm, moist air as she massaged the fragrant shampoo into her hair. She never did like that stuff the Alliance provided and always made sure to keep a bit of vanilla stashed away. She loved that smell. She leaned against the wall, just enjoying the feel of the warm water until it started to cool before shutting it off and stepping out of the stall. 

Wrapping herself in a towel, she dug through her bag before wringing the water out of her hair and brushing it out. It was a good bit longer when it was wet, reaching well past her shoulders with all the curl pulled out by the weight of the water. Pulling it up into a tight ponytail, she toweled dry and dressed before heading back into the mess. It was late, but she might be able to find something worth munching on. The room was still empty....and quiet. Too quiet. The only noises the occasional ticks and thrums you hear in any vessel and the deep, almost soundless pulse of the core that she felt through her feet more than heard, but her mind was anything but silent. She pulled on her headphones as she entered the galley, scrolling through her music on her omnitool before making a selection. The pounding of drums filled her head, blocking out the last of the nightmares and she closed her eyes in relief, nodding her head with the song before opening a cabinet.

_In a jungle of hardware and mass frustration  
Overloaded with way too much information_

Singing along quietly, she bushed a few boring supplies, potatoes, rice, and pulled out the box she’d hidden. _Damn, empty._ She always tried to keep a few sweets around for such evenings, but had forgotten to restock. _Surely I’m not the only one. There must be more in here somewhere. Let the hunt begin._ Straightening, she began clattering around the galley, opening cabinets and peeking inside before closing them again in disgust, heedless of the noise. Anybody awake was elsewhere on duty and sleep pods were well soundproofed, better to contain snoring.

_I am needing more than the virtual world I'm seeing  
Could someone just let me talk to a live  
human being?_

She needed to talk to the cook about this. It was either horribly organized, or he had a system that made absolutely no sense to her brain. The only thing clear was which cabinets were dextro. Didn't want to get that mixed up in case someone WAS allergic. 

_While automation and droids just keep on coming  
Want to unplug right now, want to just start running_

Craning her neck to look up, she groaned in frustration. It was so humiliating to try and get into those, but they were the only ones left. Gripping the counter for balance, she stretched, standing on tiptoe to flip open the first of the upper cabinets...and nearly cried out in joy. _BINGO!_ Someone had brought a big box of cookies and tried to hide them in the back of the lesser used storage. Settling back on her heels, her forehead creased as she considered how to get them down. She could go back to her office and get her chair, but that was just humiliating. Glancing into the mess hall, she shook her head. Most of the furniture on these ships was bolted down in some way. It would make a bad situation even worse to have not only people, but tables and chairs start floating in an emergency. 

_What I'm missing is true emotion_  
I get lost in this digital ocean  
What I'm needing right now is human feel 

Shepard glanced around the mess again and back up at the box. _I wonder_....There was one option, but could she use it today? As she began to turn her mind’s eye inward, she froze, ripping off her headphones and looking out into the mess hall. _I swore I heard....nope, still just me._ Chuckling at her own paranoia, she glanced back up, fixing the box in her mind, and closed her eyes.

Shepard slowly began shutting out everything, searching inwards. Ignore the cool air, the beat under your feet, the occasional release from pipes, even the ever present hum of the lights.... _ah, there you are._ Feeling that well of power, she gave a mental twist and connected. The power overflowed down into her hands and arms. It should have been exhilarating. Shepard sighed.

What a disappointment. 

Still, it might just be enough. Opening eyes that now glowed faintly in the light, she directed the pale violet glow through the mnemonic, one of the few she’d learned. The glow was hardly even visible under the bright overhead lights. It dimmed, flickering, threatening to sputter and die. She closed her eyes, reaching deeper and managing to snag a little more, feeling the small, electric rush as it trickled through and steadied. Stretching out, she wrapped it around the box, feeling its mass rest against her field, and gave a sharp tug. _Too fast._ She could tell before even opening her eyes that the weak biotic glow had died. As she looked up, Shepard groaned. The box probably hadn't even moved an inch.

_No. I can do at least this much._

Scrunching her eyes shut again, she reached and hooked into the power stored in her one more time, wrapping it around the box, but this time pressing against the back of it, slowly changing its center of gravity. 

_That's it....just a little more._

"Shepard?"

Shepard's heart tried to jump out of her chest as she squeaked in surprise, whipping around to find herself nose to keel with the one person who seemed to be able to sneak up on her. 

"WHAT THE HECK, GARRUS?!" She smacked him in the chest as she glared up at him. "HOW DO YOU KEEP DOING THAT?!"

He tilted his head, looking down at her with one mirthful eye, mandible flared in that cocky grin of his, before glancing over her head. She ducked as his arm shot out, but heard the thump of the box landing in his palm, instead of on her skull. As he stepped back with her prize, he chuckled.

"I'm just that good, Shepard." Examining the box he held, he gave it a bit of a shake before glancing back at her. "Was this what you were after?"

"Gimme!" She lunged for them, but he held them up higher, shaking his head as she stretched, attempting to grab the box from his hand.

"Ah...ah.... Are these even yours, Shepard?" His dual tones sounded amused at this strange situation he'd found himself in.

She stopped, huffing and crossing her arms in annoyance at his antics.

"They might as well be. It's my ship and they're out here...alone...unguarded. Fair game."

"Hmmmmm...." He stared down at her, mandibles flicking as he playfully considered while still holding the box out of reach, much to her aggravation, before tossing them to her. "Fair enough." She caught the cookies with a whoop and ran into the mess, plopping down at a table and tearing into them as Garrus reached into the dextro supplies and pulled out a fruit and a handful of what looked like jerky, if jerky was dark purple anyway. His eyes met hers, before glancing at the chair across from her. Shepard felt, more than heard, a low questioning thrum.

"Well, go ahead. It's not like it has anyone's name on it."

He bobbed his head, moving to take the seat. Even watching, she didn't hear him as he moved to take the seat. Seriously, how did he move so quietly? She didn't even realize she'd voiced it out loud until he grinned at her and flared his mandibles wide, showing off his sharp teeth that gleamed even in the low night cycle lights of the mess.

"I'm a predator, Shepard. Turians wouldn't be very good predators if we were overly noisy, now would we."

She nodded.

"True enough."

She dug around in the box, pulling out a cookie and tossing it in her mouth, humming in bliss. _Mmmm...chocolate._ Garrus watched, amused, before pointing at the box in her hands.

"You sure you want to eat those?"

"Yep." Shepard raised her eyebrow at him as she grabbed another. 

He shrugged, raising his shoulders awkwardly.

"Okay, but just remember who's going to be fixing your next bullet wound. This chair may not have a name on it, but those do." Garrus tapped a talon on the cardboard side facing him. She turned it around.

 _Great._ Apparently she'd just happened to find Chakwas' secret cookie stash. Grumbling, she put the cookie she still held back in with the rest and closed the top, plopping her head onto her hands with an annoyed grunt and staring at the table in front of her nose. She blinked as she heard a shuffling sound, and a round bronze fruit was pushed in front of her face across the table surface. She glanced up, meeting Garrus' eyes, and he bobbed his head toward it before turning to his strange meat strips. 

Nodding in thanks, she picked it up, looking it over. It was a round thing, about the size of her fist, and nicely firm and heavy in her hand. As she took a bite, her eyes widened in surprise and pleasure. It didn't taste or feel all that different from an apple. Tart and crisp. He smiled as she mumbled appreciatively around the treat, before turning to his own snack, tossing some of the jerky into his mouth and swallowing with a very familiar bob of the head. _Birds indeed._

"So what are doing up at this hour anyway, Shepard?"

Swallowing her last bite of the fruit, she met his eyes.

"Couldn't I ask you the same thing?" Mandibles clicked against his jaw, making a sharp sound in the quiet, and he shook his head.

"I'm a turian."

Shepard cocked her head at him, confused what that had to do with it.

"So?"

"Turians don't need as much sleep as humans, only about 5 or 6 hours to your 8, and we don't sleep all at one time. We tend to sleep 2 or 3 times a day in shorter bursts."

She looked at him for a minute before busting out laughing. He was completely serious!

"Wait! You guys take cat naps?!" He blinked at her, confusion obvious on his face.

"Do cats take naps like that? Anyway, you avoided the question. Why are you up?"

She plopped her heads back on her hands with a deep sigh, looking up at him. She didn't know why, but she really wanted to tell him. At the same time, she didn't tell anyone about this kind of stuff. It was hers to bear, not his. She gave herself a bit of a mental shake before answering.

"I've always been a bit of a night owl. I don't sleep well. Usually, I just stay in my cabin, looking over reports. The ship seems a bit weird with only night crew up."

"Owl?" Garrus cocked his head at the reference. Oh boy, human slang.

Shepard picked her head up and accessed her omnitool, using it to pull up a search. Selecting a picture of a stooping great horned owl, she turned her arm to let him see. His eyebrow plates raised at the image of the winged predator and he even glanced at his talons and back at the spread talons of the bird of prey, comparing the two.

"It's a mainly nocturnal aerial predator from earth. Being a night owl just means you're more nocturnal than most." Suddenly, Shepard realized that those same talons that he seemed to be mentally comparing, were clasped loosely around her wrist as he examined the picture. It surprisingly wasn't bothering her as much as most people would, but she still wasn't entirely sure about it. She gently eased her hand back and he blinked, looking down in surprise and immediately unlocking his grip. He probably hadn't even realized he'd done it, but she smiled. Garrus was so far much more understanding of some of her quirks than most.

His blue eyes flicked up, meeting hers, before returning to the picture.

"Palaven doesn't really have much large airborne wildlife. The same plates that protect us from radiation would make flight for anything of a reasonable size virtually impossible." But he grinned, flashing his teeth as he added "Of course, that means the few we have are quite spectacular."

She imagined they were. Anything that could have metallic skin or plates AND FLY would probably be amazing to see. Which reminded her...

"You know," She smiled up at him "I never did look up a picture of that Shatha creature you mentioned."

He hummed, pulling out his own tool and typing in a search. She watched as he scrolled....and scrolled...AND SCROLLED. He shook his head, huffing in disgust and typing in something else, glancing at her as he looked through the new results.

"Sorry, due to their nature, it can be really hard to properly get an image of them. It might take....Ah!" He stopped, selecting the entry he'd just seen and turning his own arm to her.

Wow. Shepard gasped in wonder....if this was a Shatha, she wasn't sure if she ever wanted to meet one in person. The photo featured a bronze plated turian holding a chain leash to the collar of an animal, but the animal definitely took all the attention. It dwarfed the turian holding it, taller again by half at the shoulder, its large square head raised with a haughty expression that was extremely feline. If she had to guess, she'd say it was a close relative of turians, similar to how apes were close to humans. It had the same mandibles, similar facial plates, and a fringe, but its fringe was more like a ruff, or short mane that extended down its spine, along its lean body and powerful tail. The most amazing thing though, was its plates. Unlike the dull, metallic plates of turians, this thing’s plates shone like pure silver. They were reflective enough that sections of it blended completely with the trees around it, while other sections shone like a noonday sun. Beautiful. Of course, if those sharp teeth, large haunches, and huge talons ripping into the earth were anything to go by, it was all predator.

"Wow. I don't know if I want to pet it, or run from it." Meeting his eyes, she grinned "Please tell me they aren't common though. I'd hate to run into one in the wild. I probably wouldn't even see it coming with those plates."

She realized they'd reversed at some point. His plates were warm, and not as hard as she'd have thought, under her fingers. He pulled his own arm back to look at the picture again, a regretful look on his face. She cocked her head at him, curious, but he shook his head.

"Sadly, they're very rare. They were thought lost for a while, but started showing up in less populated areas. Thankfully they seem to be coming back. Though," Garrus gave an evil smirk "it's hard to get a proper count of a creature that you can't see until it kills you." He glanced back at the photo, considering. "You know, they probably wait until both Menae and Nanus are on the rise. Supposedly that's when they search for mates. Easier to get a count of males at least, when they shine like beacons in the night."

She gasped, making him chuckled at her expression.

"You made that up! Seriously, now that I have to see."

"Maybe you should come to Palaven some time. We can both go see it." He shut his jaw with a snap, and looked to be blushing again. Glancing down at his tool, he sighed and stood, holding out a hand to help her to her own feet.

"You know, you’re always welcome to come join me in the cargo bay. The night cycles on a human vessel are a bit too long and quiet for me. It already gets really dull" She chuckled as he attempted to roll his eyes in exasperation at his sleeping fellow crew mates before meeting her gaze again and grinning. "I'd welcome the company."

Nodding, she started to follow him, but stopped looking back at the box still sitting on the table.

"Ummmm....."

With an amused snort, Garrus grabbed it and tucked it away before heading into the elevator with her. There was a bump as they started their slow way down to the next floor.

"So...biotic huh? But I've never seen you use it before"

She snorted. 

"Garrus, what you saw was me at my best. I didn't get anything until my late teens, and after testing and minimal training, it was decided that I wasn't even powerful enough to waste an amp on. Most of the time, I get nothing or a tiny light show. On a really good day I can lift an empty cup and hold it for a minute." His mandibles clicked, an action she started to recognize as an expression of surprise.

"Wait, so you're not all like Kaiden?" She rocked with the bump as the elevator reached the bottom and locked in place.

"Heck no!" She waved him off with a laugh as they stepped into the bay. The lights were still low for the night cycle here too, but she was starting to realize that turians must have better night vision than humans. "Kaiden's one of our best. There are people with strong useful biotics like him. They get amps and rigorous training, even have to be registered. Then you get those with lesser strengths, not as good for fighting, but can still lift and use them once they get amps and a little training. And then..." She rolled her eyes and jerked her thumbs to her chest. "You get me. Unless I paid for the surgery and amp myself, I'm not going to get one. Even with the proper equipment and training, I wouldn't be able to lift more than a few pounds. Still better than the tumors that some kids got I guess, just not very useful. Kaiden would probably barely even be able to sense that I'm a biotic at all. At least, he would if he decided to look at ME instead of just my records and history" She glared at him "among other things." 

Garrus chuckled at her apparent discomfort with her...fan. 

"So you have noticed it after all." He rolled his head to pin her with one amused eye as she practically squirmed under the attention. She rolled her eyes, throwing her arms up in disgust.

"Duh! The guy has a crazy case of hero worship, which means he doesn't know me at all, just my most famous achievements."

He walked back to the Mako, pulling out the next tool and slid under the nose, opening a compartment to examine the mechanisms. Shepard sat against a wheel, wiggling against the rough tread to get comfortable, and watched him work.

"So, biotics can sense each other?"

"Depending on their strengths, yeah. I can only tell if I really try, so not very useful, but a powerful biotic can easily feel the energy of the element zero in another biotic. For me, it's like a faint tugging as if something in the other person is sitting there going 'here, here! I'm over here!'" She threw up her hands, waving them like an exited child. "but I only get that much if they're pretty strong and I'm blocking out most everything else while trying to feel it."

He snorted.

"What?! That's what it feels like!" She frowned, looking at the floor in thought, before glancing back at him suspiciously. "Honestly, I usually don't tell anyone I'm biotic at all. There are a lot of people who look down on or even fear biotics and I don't like messing with all the prejudice when I don't even get any of the benefits of actually being a real biotic." She tried not to sound too worried, but it must have crept out as he paused, meeting her eyes before giving a soft smile.

"I told you Shepard. Your deep, dark secret's safe with me. I'll just add that one to the list."

She nodded in thanks. Changing the subject as she watched him pluck at wiring and fiddle with programs on his tool.

......

This was much better than earlier, just alone in the quiet, still night. Garrus was actually really enjoying her company and this chance to talk to her one on one. They didn't really talk about much of importance. He told her about Palaven, the blinding sun shining on the red bluffs, elegant homes built into them wherever possible to protect from its harsh rays. The quiet of noon, when even wildlife took shelter, and the busy hubbub of the twilight hours in both city and country as animals and people alike came out into the open air.

She discussed Earth. He knew something about her now. Shepard was a city girl. In fact, surprisingly, she had barely left the city her whole life. As they compared wildlife from their worlds, she admitted that most of what she was showing she'd only seen in pictures. Even what she claimed were the most common ones, like that one with their spindly, tiny legs, branching spines that came from their heads, making it look like they were wearing small saplings, and simply covered in this....fur. Deer she called them, how odd. Glimpsed in holos and movies, but never in the wild. 

He showed her more pictures of their native animals, making her gasp in delight at each creatures different method of protection from the sun, whether spines, plates, or one that had a round carapace all over that she giggled and immediately shouted "TURTLE!" and pulled up a picture of a creature from earth that actually did, much to his amusement, look almost identical.

She relaxed against the wheel as they continued talking for a couple of hours, but he noticed that her replies were getting slower, more sluggish. 

"Yeah..."

"Mmmhmmm..."

Eventually, in the middle of checking the main gun's targeting programming and inner mechanisms, he asked a question, but it went unanswered, just echoing slightly in the still air. He cocked his head.

"Shepard?" 

She still didn't answer, but he could hear her breathing in the quiet space. She was still here. Listening to the slow, steady breathing, his mandibles slowly widened in a grin. 

_She didn't._

He scooted away from the gun, looking over the edge at her still leaning against the same tire....fast asleep.

 _Apparently not THAT much of a night owl._

He slowly shook his head with a chuckle, shuffling back to the other side of the Mako and dropping to the ground, legs flexing to absorb the impact as he landed virtually without a sound. Walking to the edge of the room, he found his own gear and pushed some aside as he searched. _There you are._

He pulled out a blanket and unfolded it as he went back to Shepard's side, gently tucking it around her. The air didn't bother him much, but it did get a bit cool in there. She might not be comfortable. Checking his omnitool, he shook his head before quietly scaling the side of the Mako and going back to work, poking at the gears and belts that turned the great weapon.

It may only be for another hour, but he would let her sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh....night terrors are not fun. If you've never had them, DON'T and be happy for it. Having frequent night terrors will literally drive you insane. 
> 
> This does show a bit of how they start out as friends. I think it's cute. Oh, and yeah, Shep's a biotic...sort of...not really.
> 
> If you're curious, the song is Human Feel by Journey. If you're not curious...oops.
> 
> Helpful comments appreciated!


	12. Of Rabbits and Kairn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the Normandy approaches Therum, Shepard gets a nasty surprise....the geth are already there! This pick-up will not be near as easy as they had thought. 
> 
> And Wrex, don't call Shepard tiny. She really doesn't like that.

"Wrex?"

His huge, reptilian head swung down, pupils narrowing into slits as he locked eyes with this small woman who had suddenly appeared in his space. Everything about him screamed predator, and there was still a small part of Shepard that wanted to freeze under this krogan's intense gaze. The corner of his mouth twitched in a small smile...or, at least, as small as one of his species’ smiles got.

"Shepard?"

She felt a stab of irritation as she glared up at him. The hulking jerk knew exactly the effect he had on people. She crossed her arms, eyes narrowed, and ignoring the small part of her brain that still wanted to bolt.

"What are you doing?" She asked, raising an eyebrow just ever so slightly at him.

He blinked slowly, second lid flashing across his pupils as they readjusted to the cargo bay lights flickering overhead, the lights themselves seemed to not wish to test the sovereignty of this tiny female in her territory.

"Working, Shepard."

"Really..." She made a show of obviously looking around the area, spreading her arms to gesture at a whole lot of.....nothing. "Working on what Wrex?"

He squinted down at this tiny commander for a moment, smile widening as he answered.

"Working really hard on not destroying everything in sight, Shepard. That is our way." She groaned, rolling her eyes at that. _Ridiculous lizard._

"Can you work on that AND something else at the same time?"

A low, rolling chuckle rumbled from him armored chest as he grinned.

"REALLY hard, Shepard."

She sighed, rubbing her forehead in frustration at the stubborn behemoth. Hearing a giggle, she glanced over to see Tali sitting on some cargo crates, swinging her feet back and forth as she watched the show.

"You know, he's probably not even joking, Shepard. Krogan do seem to be a very aggressive species."

"And what are YOU doing?" She glared at Tali suspiciously. Tali held up a tube. _Ugh. It's that weird nutrient paste stuff she eats._

"I'm on break." The other woman responded, her accent making her response cuter than probably intended. Then again, Tali was an intelligent being. She probably used her cute accent and demeanor to her advantage when she deemed necessary. Shepard shrugged, letting it go and turning back to the prehistoric beast in front of her. Spinning on her heels, she marched over to Ashley's weapon station, grabbing a cleaning rag and throwing it at him. He was surprisingly fast for his size, clawed hand snatching it out of the air just inches from his face, much to her disappointment.

"Well, I'm not paying for a krogan statue. I'm paying for a working mercenary, Wrex." 

"Wait...." Tali tilted her head to the side as she looked at down at Shepard from her perch. "We get paid?"

Shepard rolled her eyes, examining the weapons on display. _Hmmm...that one will do._

"No, I just expect you guys to drop everything and run off with me for no reason other than the goodness of your hearts...and, you know, JUSTICE!” Her dramatic raised fist got a giggle at least. “Yes, you get paid, Tali! The council knows ships don't run themselves, so they give a fund for hiring crew. Of course, " She glared at Wrex as she yanked a shotgun down from its clips, much to Ash's apparent dismay, and stomped back. "I would only pay for WORKING crew....So GET TO WORK." She shoved the gun into his hand, claws tightening around it in reflex."I'm sure you can hold your...impulses...in check and clean weapons at the same time."

"Hey!"

Ashley glared at them, stomping over and snatching the shotgun back, or attempting to. Shepard chuckled as she yanked on the weapon, fully expecting Wrex to release it, only it didn't budge as he looked down at this second small female in his space with apparent amusement. Ash glared at her. 

"You can't just foist him off on me! He can do something else."

"Watch me! My ship, my...."

"Commander?"

Shepard cut off and glanced toward the ceiling as Joker's voice crackled over the ship comms.

"Yeah, Joker?"

"We're approaching Therum and the scans just came through. Ummmm...you might want to take a look."

Shepard raised an eyebrow. Not a single joke, no sarcastic remark, it must be an interesting scan indeed. Stepping to Ash's work station, she grabbed a spare data pad and accessed the scans with her ID. She blinked, looking up for a moment. Then she looked again. Nope, still the same. Tossing the pad back down in disgust, it skated across the workspace with a clatter as she raised narrowed eyes to the camera mounted on the ceiling.

"Are you serious, Joker?! I swear if you are pulling some stupid prank, I'll...!" 

"Dead serious, Commander"

Garrus stepped around the Mako, listening to the conversation as he dropped his tools back in their case with a clanging clatter and, wiping grease from his plates with a rag, joined them.

"What's going on?"

She pinched the bridge of her nose, letting out a deep breath, before answering.

"Well, I can about guarantee we've found her." Garrus cocked his head as Tali and Wrex just blinked at her in confusion. She threw her hands up, anger flaring again. "The geth found her first!" Picking up the pad again, she once more looked over the scans. "We can't tell exact locations or numbers. They're blocking us, but what we can tell is that the place is CRAWLING with geth!" Scrolling down, she read further and groaned. "and it's hot."

Wrex chuckled.

"Really, Shepard? A little heat is all it takes?"

"Try magma flows every five feet. We're basically going to be driving and fighting through an active volcano."

Wrex still slowly shook his head, wide grin splitting his whole face.

"A little heat and the tiny woman is out."

Shepard froze before slowly looking back at him. Ashley let out a low whistle, ducking back into her own territory. Even Garrus stopped, mandibles tightening at her dark expression.

"What did you call me?"

Wrex just chuckled.

"It's what you are, isn't it?"

Shepard considered for a moment before her lips curled into her own malicious grin, eyes narrowed at his looming figure.

"All right then, full heavy armor, Garrus and Wrex. Be ready to move out as soon as the Mako is ready." She met Garrus's crystal gaze and he nodded. He'd have her all fixed for the drop.

Joker!" Glancing to the camera again, her grin widened further. "Find us a drop point."

As she turned away, she barely saw Garrus glare at Wrex as he growled under his breath.

"Great, why am I in trouble?!" His voice carried, the dual vocals flanging more vividly than normal. Was that a sign of humor or genuine agitation? Something to ponder later.

......

The three of them stood before the Mako in the cleared cargo bay. Opening the door, Shepard grabbed the frame, hauling herself into the vehicle with a grunt. She heard Wrex chuckle behind her and rolled her eyes at him as she moved to the driver's seat as Garrus stepped in. Shepard motioned to the engineering and co-pilot post next to her, leaving the gunner’s post for Wrex. She watched over her shoulder as he easily stepped in, the Mako leaning with a groan of straining shocks as it took and adjusted to the weight. She huffed in disgust as he grinned at her, turning back and beginning the necessary checks.

"Okay." Looking back, she met both of their eyes, smiling at her two victims...ahem... squad mates. "Have either of you ridden in one of these before?" 

Both shook their heads with mumbled negatives.

"Looks like one of ours from outside." Wrex glanced around, taking note of differences.

"Alright then. So, a few things to note, keep your harnesses on at all times unless told otherwise you might get some bruises....or worse, it can get pretty bumpy." She made a show of buckling her own as she said it. "Hands and feet stay in the vehicle at all times. If something goes wrong on the drop...don't worry about it cause it won't bother you for long anyway. Oh," She grinned at them as she tapped her omnitool selecting an old rock song. "and driver picks the music." The first beats of Highway to Hell filled the Mako as the engine turned over with a rumble. Shepard tapped the wheel, singing along under her breath.

_Living easy, living free, Season ticket on a one-way ride. Asking nothing, leave me be..._

As she continued making a few last minute adjustments, she leaned towards Garrus, making sure to speak over the music."You did put her back the way she was, right?" He shook his head, muttering under his breath at her as he looked over his controls.

"No Shepard, I left off the unimportant bits...OF COURSE I DID! Other than a couple of improvements, everything’s exactly the same."

"Okay then!" Straightening, she clapped her hands loudly in the small dark space, a practically predatory grin spreading across her face as the song beat rose to the first chorus. Joker's voice cut into the team comms.

"Really Commander? You're going with that one?"

"What?!" She tilted her head to the side, glaring as she jabbed a finger at the camera mounted in front of them. "Don't be hating on the classics, Joker! Oh, and by the way..." She reached under the seat and felt something soft. Picking it up, she waved his cap at the camera. “This...is coming with us.”

“Hey!” She chuckled at the exclamation, cutting the comm for now with a sharp click.

The first displays started to flicker to life around them, offering a wide view of the outside. Garrus nodded, satisfied, and even Wrex looked impressed. The screens offered nearly a full 360 view for driver and crew. The alliance made sure that there were few blind spots for an enemy to exploit. 

Of course, this offered front row seats to the view of the cargo bay door opening. The shields were still in place to keep the atmosphere in the bay perfect, extra shielding flaring to life to split actual cargo and work stations from any disturbance, but the door was yawning wider as they watched.

For a second, the music faded to the background as Shepard gazed in awe at the view before them. This...This right here. This was one of the reasons she joined the Alliance. One of the things that made it all worthwhile. She stared out at the world before them in wonder. Red hills rose, looking very much like mars from this height. Rivers of gold crossing its surface like the veins and arteries, carrying the very lifeblood of a world with them. They were high enough to see the curvature its surface, sparse clouds catching the crimson glow and reflecting it back as a soft rose hued glow in the upper atmosphere. The fade from yellow to red-orange, and finally to the deep, blue-black of space dotted with pinpricks of distant light that broke through the veil. 

She loved this part of the job.

A talon tapped her on the shoulder, drawing her attention back, music once again filling her ears as she turned to meet Garrus's eyes, which flickered between hers....and the open air before them. He looked decidedly nervous.

_Like a wheel, gonna spin it. Nobody's gonna mess me around_

"Ummm...Shepard," His eyes flicked to hers again for a moment before going back to the view, looking extremely nervous. He swallowed hard and she nearly laughed. Was he afraid of heights.....or was it falling? Oh dear. Either way, he wasn't going to enjoy this at all. "We are going to LAND....aren't we?"

Throwing a glance over her shoulder, she saw Wrex did look interested in her answer, but didn't seem overly concerned. He would probably have an easier time with this. Some even enjoyed it after the first shock. She sure did. Remembering his question, she met Garrus's eyes for a moment, before her lips stretched into a practically evil grin. He swallowed again, talons tightening on his already hooked harness. 

CLUNK!

The Mako shuddered as the Normandy's tow bar attached to the undercarriage, holding the vehicle firm as the kinetic ahead barriers flickered out. Wind roared into the cargo bay, screaming like a living thing above guitars, determined to rip anything it found apart, stopped only by strong shields and armor plating. The Mako shivered, but was held firm against the gale.

_Playing in a rocking band, Hey mama, look at me._

Shepard made sure she was secure and leaned forward, tapping a glowing icon on her screens, releasing control and leaving the Mako completely at the Normandy's, and thus Joker's, mercy. Seeing Garrus still watching her nervously, still waiting for an answer, she chuckled.

"Hope that hat didn’t make him TOO angry. Thank you for flying Mako, gentleman. Keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle during...well...everything actually. Double check your safety equipment, and enjoy the ride!" She looked towards the comm speaker. "Whenever you're ready Joker!"

"Reaching drop point.....NOW!" 

_I'm on the highway to hell!_

The connector sprang to life beneath them, snapping forward and shooting them out the open cargo bay door. The Mako flew forward, seeming to defy even gravity for a moment as the cable snapped free, leaving them weightless. Briefly, the Normandy could be heard over the screaming guitars as it roared overhead, already curving up and back towards the proper orbiting distance even as gravity once more grabbed hold.

The Mako's flight curved, tilting ever faster towards the planet, wind rushing past them as they plummeted towards the surface in freefall. Her hair floated around her face, seemingly unaffected by gravity even as they fell in its grip. Shepard heard a yelp and looked to see Garrus clutching his harness in what probably would have been a white knuckled grip if he were human even as Wrex laughed. 

The ground was fast approaching before them as he called her name.

"Yeah Garrus?" She looked at him, face calm as if she didn't have a care in the world even as the red hills quickly rose to meet them. 

He pointed a shaky talon.

"Ground!" His voice squeaked a little and she chuckled. Reaching forward, she tapped the next button and they hit their seats with a thump as the vehicles barriers and artificial gravity snapped into place. Not a moment too soon. The sound of rushing wind was replaced by the firing of the Mako's thrusters, slowing them to still very hard, though not too destructive landing. They bounced forwards a ways on their huge tires before coming to a complete stop, safely on Therum's surface. Technically, the Mako's safety features would have made sure that they weren't ever in danger, but she always liked to see if she could beat the system.

Garrus breathed a sigh of relief, before narrowing his eyes at her, a clicking hiss coming from between his tight mandibles. _Now that’s a sound you wouldn’t want to have sneak up on you in the dark._

"You did that on purpose!"

She widened her eyes innocently, pressing a hand to her breastplate in horror.

"Who, ME?" She exclaimed dramatically, as if aghast by the very idea. 

Wrex reached forward, clasping her shoulder in a hand nearly as big as her whole torso as he gave another rumbling chuckle.

"That was great. Let's do it again, Shepard. I want to see him squeal like a little girl youngling again."

Garrus jerked his head back, baring his teeth with mandibles wide in a low growl, but Wrex just laughed harder.

"Bring it on, Turian." Wrex taunted. 

Shepard leaned toward him as the song wound down, patting Garrus on the shoulder in sympathy in the silence that slowly reclaimed the vehicle.

"That is honestly almost everybody's response to the first launch. Warning doesn't help, so I learned not to give it." Then she gave a sly grin. "Of course, that doesn't mean I don't like to have a teeeeny bit of fun with first timers."

He glared at her.

"I hate you so much right now."

"No you don't!" 

He shook his head with a huff, his mandibles clacking into place, turning back to his own displays and checking to make sure everything was still normal. Shepard straightened, expression becoming more serious.

"Alright, because they're shielding, we don't know exactly how many or what kind of geth we'll run into. Wrex, " She glanced back, meeting his eyes. "Shoot anything that looks synthetic."

His mouth widened in a dark, feral smile, showing his sharp teeth as he nodded.

"That I can do."

"And Garrus, just make sure our shields hold, or let me know if we need to retreat for repairs."

He nodded, his expression grim.

Shepard turned back to the front, checking the console just below her main screen for the layout of the area, before pressing the gas and heading out.

Of course, it didn't take long for them to run into the geth that they were expecting.

"What is that?" Garrus cocked his head at his console readouts. "Unknown ship incoming, but it looks too small for much of anything. Bigger than a fighter, but nowhere near the size of the even the Normandy. Hmmmm...might be some form of drop ship, but I don't know how many it could carry at that size." He looked up meeting her eyes "Keep an eye out."

She nodded watching as the ship finally was within visible distance, pausing far ahead of them. _Yup, it's a drop ship, but that's a type of drop I've never seen before._

"Would you look at that?! It keeps them compact and collapsed and SHOOTS THEM!" Her eyes widened in surprise. "Handy"

"And very bad. That ship could be carrying far more than I thought."

"They still die when you shoot them, no matter how many there are." Wrex rumbled from the turret.

Shepard borrowed the turret's view, zooming in on the enemies unfolding ahead. It was interesting, like watching origami backwards, or a puzzle box unfold.... _CRAP!_

"Watch it, they're huge. Colossus for sure." Seeing their heads start to glow, she left that view, and watched on her screens as they fired, plasma bolts apparently as they seemed to travel towards them in slow motion. _Their range is HUGE!_

"Hold on!" Shepard hit the thrusters, sending the Mako briefly skyward as the bolts sailed harmlessly underneath, humming and crackling with unspent energy. Even as their tires hit the ground with a small bounce, she gunned it, racing towards them in an attempt to get within reasonably accurate firing range. 

"Wrex?!" She hit the thrusters again, bouncing them sideways this time to avoid the next blast as it cratered where they had just been. Volcanic rock pinged against the side and top of the Mako as she started weaving a path forward, hopping to avoid more blasts.

"Almost in range, get a bit closer!"

She continued to weave, using thrusters when the blasts got too close to skip them further out of the way. Their back path must be littered with craters at this rate.

"Wrex!"

"Shepard!"

She twisted in her seat to glare at him, turning back just in time to hit the Mako's thrusters, bouncing them over yet another plasma blast. These Colossus were being a pain in the ass. 

"Would you shoot it already?!"

"It's hard to shoot anything when we're bouncing around like....like..."

"Like one of your rabbits, Shepard." Garrus supplied. 

Wrex leaned around the gun sights to narrow his eyes at their companion

"What's a rabbit?"

"Never mind that, just SHOOT IT!" They jolted as she once more had to bounce the heavy vehicle out of the way.

"Need me to come back there old man?" Garrus leaned around to look at him and Wrex snarled, the sound filling the cabin.

"I don't need some spiky, spineless, kairn to help me shoot something."

"A what?"

"Forget you BOTH! I'll handle it myself!" Shepard narrowed her eyes at the geth before her. By now they were fairly close, so she gave up the weaving and gunned it straight at them, spinning the wheels into the red dust for a moment as the Mako struggled for more traction before rocketing forward.

"Shepard!" Garrus ducked, wincing as the Colossus preparing to fire filled their screens.

_CRUNCH!_

The Mako struggled only for a brief moment before the tires gripped onto the new surface...slick geth plating. She spun the wheel, grinding it further into the dust as their back end swung around, clipping the other Colossus and knocking it off its feet. It lay in the dust on its back, feet comically wiggling and looking vaguely like an overturned beetle, until she threw it in reverse and ran over it too, scrambling her passengers as the Mako rocked over its now broken corpse. Roaring forwards, she jounced over both of them an extra time for good measure, before finally coming to a stop, clouds of crimson ash settling around them.

Garrus keened as he looked at his console, throwing his hands over his head in distress. 

"What did she do to you?!"

She saw him immediately start the release of omnigel into the worst sections. A temporary measure, but one that would hold them together until real repairs could be made.

Wrex sat stunned for a moment...and then roared with laughter, throwing his head back as it reverberated inside the cab. 

"That's one way to do it, Shepard!" 

She turned in her seat, narrowing her eyes at him. 

"Next time, SHOOT THEM FIRST! That way I don't have to hurt the Mako every time we come across an enemy. Keep missing and I'll run you over with them."

He quieted, watching to see if she was serious, before giving a solemn nod...before once more chuckling and breaking the seriousness of the moment. She watched him, trying to maintain her anger, but finally cracked a smile and chuckled.

"What the heck did you call Garrus anyway? My translator didn't catch that one."

"Hmmm...Oh. A kairn. Small bug, about the size of one of your hands, too many legs. They die easy, but breed too fast to get rid of. They get into EVERYTHING. Worse than pyjaks."

"Roach...he called you a roach Garrus. Wait...what the heck is a big bug if your small ones are the size of my hand?"

Wrex considered for a moment.

"Big as this vehicle, maybe bigger."

She shuddered. "Remind me to NEVER go to Tuchanka. Nope-planet is a nope. She ready to move Garrus?"

"Ready as she'll ever be" He patted the surface in front of him, mandibles still tight.

"Men!" Shepard rolled them forward, continuing up the path to the dig, weaving to avoid lava flows as she went, the Mako bouncing over every tiny rock and bump on the path.

"Is it.... supposed to.......bounce so much?" Garrus was ducking his head to make sure his fringe didn't crack against the ceiling on large bumps, each jostle interrupting him. 

"The Mako....is built to be strong, not....to give a smooth ride. Don't.....ask me why they couldn't do both." Shepard tried to shrug, but it was blocked by the harness and the very movement of the Mako as made its clumsy way over the volcanic rock riddled trail. There was a clear point for a moment as they crossed what seemed to be an earthen bridge over the lava flow. Outside sensors spiked as they passed over it, briefly going well outside the level that their armor would have been able to handle, had they not had the Mako.

"Yay for air conditioning! And environmental stabilizer cores!" 

Wrex gave a rolling chuckle.

"A little heat." He mumbled under his breath.

"Hey! Do you want to get out and walk you old dinosaur?" 

"Hmmmm..." He actually seemed to consider for a moment "I COULD, but then you wouldn't have a gunner. I'll stay."

"Shepard," Garrus tapped his sensor feed, swiping it to send to her screen. "Enemies up ahead. They're dug in pretty tight there. We need another route."

She reviewed the original scans of the landscape before tapping a section.

"Here, this narrow crevice is just big enough for the Mako and looks to lead around behind the blockade they've set up."

They were almost in sight of the geth when she spotted it, bluffs on either side disguising the entrance. The Mako actually scraped the sides of the tiny canyon, making Garrus wince at the squeal of metal against stone. She barely saw from the corner of her eye as he patted the console as if to reassure his poor vehicle. 

"Ah come on Garrus! A little paint and that one will come right out. She can take it." 

He glared at her, lowering his brow plates. It would have possibly looked intimidating...if he hadn't been stroking the Mako's cool, metal surface like it was a prized hound.

"Next time, how about you take the hit and we'll see if paint will fix it with you."

"Awe, Garrus, didn't know you cared." 

The blast of a turret brought her attention back to the front. 

"All right, they're dug in here too, but not as badly. Wrex," She turned her eyes to him, meeting his gaze. "Time your shots and actually HIT them this time."

He nodded, before looking to the main gun's sights as she waited until the next blast hit the earth in front of them, then rolled the Mako right over the crater and through the cloud of ash and dust and into sight of the geth cannons. The great BOOM of their main gun shook the Mako as Wrex fired at it, quickly replaced by the staccato rattle of the smaller machine gun while the cannon cooled. He missed by only a foot or so with the first blast, close enough that it tipped a little and was still damaged. Seeing the other start to glow as it charged, she rolled them backward, out of range, but not before Wrex managed one more shot, obliterating the first cannon with a direct hit.

"That's more like it!"

They continued the pattern for several minutes, rolling into view as the geth cannons were recharging or out of view for repairs from small amounts of damage from the geth on foot. Eventually, once both main turrets were destroyed and the geth were getting closer, Shepard roared around the corner full speed, drifting in the dust as she smeared geth soldiers into the earth.

"ALRIGHT! Now we just activate the gate and head on our way. Much better performance Wrex."

He just unhooked himself, muttering under his breath as he moved to the door.

"Be easier if you learned to drive, Shepard."

She shook her head, opening the hatch for them to disembark. 

"Nobody can drive these things, Wrex"

Garrus chuckled as he unhooked himself and followed them out.

"I'm sure someone can....just not you." He laughed as she glared at him before jumping down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! I'm still alive, I promise. I had some major projects this past month that swallowed all my time. Hopefully chapters will be posted faster going forward. So, have any suggestions? Any advice? What works well, or needs to improve? Let me know, I'd love to hear from your side. I can't fix it if I don't know it's broken.
> 
> SEE YA!🙋


	13. Blue Lady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yay! They survived Shepard's driving (barely). Still, there's a long way to go, a scientist to save, geth to fight, and a really stupid, angry krogan somewhere in the mix?...this is going to be a really long day.

"End of the line guys."

Shepard unfastened, squeezing past to jump down. After routing through geth ambushes, tunnels, navigating narrow passages, jumping the Mako over rivers of lava, she'd found that they wouldn't even be able to reach the dig site with the large vehicle. The next passage was so narrow that her pet wouldn't fit.

"Thank the Spirits" Garrus grumbled behind her, stumbling as he hit the ground and pausing to find his balance again after the rocking, bouncing motion of the Mako. "I think you've fully tested whether or not a turian can get motion sickness."

"Oh, come on Garrus! It wasn't that bad!"

Wrex went to step out after him, but lost his footing, slamming to the ground.

_WHUMP!_

He laid there for a moment, stunned as the dust settled around him.

"Ow." Sitting up, he rubbed his nose with one clawed hand, wincing. "Nope, it was that bad. I didn't know my own species COULD get dizzy, Shepard." Wrex slowly pulled himself to his feet and giving a bit of a shake, like a wet dog, made his armor clatter back into position and shook some of the ash off. "Next time let someone else drive Shepard. Even our Tomkahs don't handle that bad." 

Shepard pulled her assault rifle free as she shook her head at her companions. 

"Bunch of babies." Tapping her visor, she pulled up their scans. "Okay, we don't have an accurate number because these guys are annoyingly good at blocking us, but a narrow space like this one makes a good bottle neck for enemies, so I expect some kind of ambush point or stronghold at the other end. From there it's a bit of winding path to the ruins. We're not actually that far, but I expect a ton of geth to be waiting for us. Garrus, snipe as many as you can before they get in range. I'll take the middle. Wrex....you...just do what you do best."

Wrex's hand paused, lowering from where he was rubbing at his squashed snout as his face cracked in a wide grin. With a low, rumbling laugh, he pulled out his shotgun.

"That, I can do."

She motioned him to lead the way through the narrow gap, slowly jogging behind him up the rocky slope. Shepard just barely spotted a spire over the edge of the bluffs when the first shots rang out, echoing in the narrow space.

Shepard spun behind one of the boulders for cover, grinning as she heard Wrex roar, probably already charging forward. Krogan were always a blast, unless you were fighting against them. Then they weren't quite as fun. 

Jumping up, she rested over the top of the rocks, but froze, blinking in surprise. 

Wrex had absolutely obliterated one with his shot gun, shredded remains falling to the earth, but was now wreathed in the glow of a full biotic. Throwing out his hand, he cast a ball of crackling fields at a geth hidden from view. The warp hit the geth trooper, launching him backward out of cover as the fields struck and clung to it, shredding its armor as it squealed, and leaving it vulnerable. Shepard swung her rifle around as she ran from cover, squeezing the trigger and finishing it off even as Wrex moved for the next one.

The geth sure were ready for them though, with walls, barriers, even towers for sniper's nests. Before she could even call, the report of Garrus's rifle echoed and a sniper fell from his post.

"Scoped and dropped!" She could practically hear that cocky grin of his through the comm.

"Nice!" Shepard called out without even thinking, ducking behind debris as a rain of bullets came in her direction.

She smiled as they continued forward, cleaning out the geth as they went. _Don't think I've met a single sniper who didn’t have an ego._ Still, there weren't as many as she would have expected. Short work for three experienced soldiers. For every one the Wrex managed to blast, there was one that backed out of cover and right into her own range, quick triple beat of her rifle leaving sprays of white _what is that white stuff anyway? Some kind of lubricant? Hydraulic fluid?_ in the air as they fell with screams of fried electronics. Garrus kept them covered from behind, the crack of his rifle reverberating through the canyon as he picked snipers from their hideouts. Soon silence once more claimed the small valley as they started up the winding path to the dig entrance they could now see.

"Wrex! I didn't know you were biotic!"

He tilted his head, crimson eye rolling to meet hers over his shoulder.

"Guns are more fun, Shepard."

She considered for a moment, then nodded with a grin.

"True. Still, what else can you do?"

"More than your tiny energy reserves can manage, that's for sure."

Shepard stumbled to a halt, eyes wide in shock.

"You knew!?"

He huffed in amusement.

"I've worked for some bad ones, learned from it. Caught a whiff of biotics, so I dug deeper. Hardly worth it with what you have. Me? Warp, barriers," He shrugged "simple stuff. Shotguns are messier and more fun."

There was a rumbling chuckle right behind her. Twisting, she was only a little surprised to see that Garrus had caught up and managed to get right behind her without her noticing. His mandibles flared in a wide smile.

"Guess I'm not the only one who knows that one now, Shepard."

Wrex looked at him, cocking his head in confusion.

"How does the whelp know? Doesn't have a spark of eezo in him."

Shepard watched in amusement as Garrus stiffened, snapped his jaws shut, and clapped mandibles tight to his face hard enough to make a sharp snap. She was quite pleased with what she saw. His face screamed "not telling" loud enough for any species to read, even knowing that Wrex already knew. She shook her head, might as well tell him anyway, but now she had one answer. 

Garrus would never tell a soul anything she confided in him.

"Garrus here stumbled across me trying to use them. It went about as well as I'm sure you can imagine, but he knew that I was at least a little biotic after that. I asked him not to mention it as I don't tell most people and most..." She narrowed her eyes at him "don't seem to even be interested in trying to sense it when EVERYBODY KNOWS that Commander Shepard isn't a biotic."

Wrex shook as he rumbled with laughter, pausing long enough in the climb for them to catch up.

"Using your reputation to scour your tracks from the sand, Shepard? Smart." He shook his heavy head, eyeing her with new respect. "Not many think to do that....except some shady bosses."

"Hey, comes in handy sometimes to have people think they know everything there is to know. Means they don't go digging." She commented with a shrug. 

"Wait, did you just call Shepard shady?" Garrus asked and Wrex chuckled. 

They'd reached the top and were approaching the mine entrance when Garrus stiffened next to her. Shepard tensed at the change, hands clenching on the rough surface of her own rifle as she watched for what had put him on alert.

"Garrus? What are you...."

He sprang, knocking the breath from her as she hit the ground hard behind a crate. A shot rang out, almost clipping him as it flew through where she'd been a moment before. Following the line of fire, she saw a geth stranger than any they'd seen yet. Even as she spotted it, it tensed and leapt, covering a huge amount of ground to cling to the vertical scaffolding as it lined up another shot. 

"Drop ship!" Garrus yelled even as he lined up his rifle with the geth frog. It roared overhead, craters exploding in the ground, throwing obscuring ash to the wind as geth backup was deployed. Shepard caught the sounds of a large mechanical even as its eye rose through the cloud to a ridiculous height. 

"COLOSSUS! Get to cover! Garrus, pick off the frogs! Wrex, warp the EVER LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUTTA THAT THING!" 

Garrus's rifle cracked in her ear as he started picking off the little ones, the glow of Wrex's biotics illuminating the dust still in the air, but she just focused on that glow of the giant's eye as she raised her own rifle and fired, staccato beat filling the air as she filled it with as many rounds as possible. This was one Cyclops that she was going to make sure didn’t have a chance to call for more help. 

The glow intensified as the colossus charged. Flaring bright, the plasma blast roared across the field. Shepard ducked and the crate she was behind lurched, almost knocking her and Garrus to the ground. She flinched as a laser tracked across her armor, but went out with the sharp sound of a sniper rifle, geth falling with a thump a couple of yards away. She patted a hand on Garrus's arm.

"Thanks, man."

He gave her a cocky, one-sided grin before jumping up, rifle already tracking the next one. Hearing a large metallic screech, she leaned back out of cover, grabbing for grenades from her belt. The colossus was trembling as warp field worked down its armor, leaving gaping holes to its inner workings. Activating several, she flung them toward the giant, watching them skip through the dust to land at its feet.

"Grenades! Get down Wrex!"

He didn't even bother, just kept filling the thing with as many holes as he could, cannon blasting away. _Figures_. Shepard ducked back behind the crate just as the grenade went off, throwing more dust to the wind, obscuring everything around. _Good thing geth glow._

"How you doing with the hopping frogs, Garrus?"

The crack of his rifle echoed in the sudden quiet, followed by a distant thump of a metal body hitting dirt.

"That should be the last one."

Shepard clapped him on the shoulder before peeking around the corner to squint through the choking dust for the colossus. She didn't see any glow from its optics, so hopefully it was dead...or disabled....whatever. They stepped around the, now much damaged, crate only to freeze as the sound of protesting metal filled the air. Both raised their rifles, continuing cautiously forward as the dust settled. Finally able to see the source of the sound, Shepard lowered her rifle, chuckling at herself in relief. 

"What the heck, Wrex? You scared us half to death."

Wrex gave on last pull, managing to tug the mangled head of the colossus free with a grunt of effort before moving to join them with it dangling under his arm.

"That's different." Garrus shook his head into his palm with a groan at their odd companion.

"What?" Wrex looked at them, rubbing his nose with a claw again, eyes scrunching as if in pain. Hmmm...Shepard had seen him doing that repeatedly since he fell on his face and it seemed to be getting a reddish tinge under the skin. Beginnings of a bruise? _I wonder if they're more sensitive there._ Returning her gaze to the severed head under his arm, she shook her head.

"You realize there'll be more geth inside. Are you going to be able to tote that around and fight?"

Wrex looked at her for a moment, then at his trophy, before meeting her eyes again. With a sigh, he set it on the ground.

"But I'm getting it when we're done."

She shrugged as she led the way up the ramp to the dig entrance. 

"Fine by me, but now I want one too."

Wrex chuckled. "I knew there was a reason I liked you."

Pausing at the entrance, she glanced at both of them before raising her rifle and palming the pad to open the door. She felt them both tense beside her as the door slid open, revealing....nothing.

"Huh...I would have thought they would want to ambush us right here."

"Ummmm...what do you call the colossus?" Garrus tilted his head to look down at her, amused.

"A prequel."

She led the way through the tunnel, three sets of footsteps echoing off the walls. Somewhere there was the sound of water dripping. _Water? Here?!_ At least one benefit of being in the tunnels was found very quickly. They weren't blocking their tracking anymore. Her visor blinked a warning, alerting her to several geth waiting for them ahead.

"Geth ahead, be ready"

Garrus and Wrex nodded, claws tensing over triggers, ready for anything.

_Drip......drip_

A slight shift ahead was all the warning the geth gave.

Gunfire echoed off the walls of the tunnel, shields glowing bright, deflecting rounds that would have struck true as Shepard ducked instinctively. She pulled her own rifle up, shoulder taking the recoil as she returned fire, an electrical screech letting her know she got through as the trooper was thrown backward over the rail, a clang echoing as it struck something below. Another flashlight crept into view before being flung backwards as the report of Garrus's rifle deafened them in the enclosed space. Shepard shook her head, rubbing her ears as she winced. Garrus ducked his head, a soft, embarrassed smile on his face.

"Sorry"

"You hit it, that's what counts." She shook her head one more time to try and clear the ringing from her ears. "Besides, at least it wasn't that cannon that Wrex calls a shotgun."

"Hey!"

Shepard stepped to the rail, peeking over. The first one must have clipped the railing below and kept falling. The railing was dented, but there was no sign of him. She gulped. It was a long way down. 

"I thought you weren't scared of heights, Shepard" Garrus gave her a teasing grin as he looked over the edge himself.

"The Mako's different from a rickety, who-knows-how-old scaffolding." She shook her head and turned from the edge, jogging down the ramp towards an elevator. She noticed she could actually hear Garrus for once, footsteps magnified by the metal surface. Of course, Wrex was far noisier, clanging and bashing his way down behind them like a whole percussion band. The elevator was large enough for them all to ride down comfortably, so they got in, waiting as it rumbled its way down. _Must be for moving equipment too._

There were only some drone turrets waiting for them, easily taken care of. Far more fascinating were the ruins themselves. Their first close look at them didn't look especially interesting, until you remembered they were over fifty thousand years old! The tile looked exactly like something she would see today, but everything was blocked by some kind of barrier. She pressed her hand to it, fingers flat along the surface. Although it looked paper thin and translucent, there was no give whatsoever. Shepard could have been holding her hand to a cool metal plate and felt about the same. A kinetic barrier? A pretty good one too for its age.

"I'm not sure who put this barrier up, but we may need to find a way to shut it down. Who knows, our scientist may be on the other side." She glanced over the side as she approached the elevator and winced. At least the bottom was visible, but it was still a bit of distance. She waited for her team mates to join her and activated the mechanism to lower them further, watching the smooth tiled walls pass as they went down.

"It looks like it was here before the caves, like it was somehow buried, but still looks almost new."

"Who knows what it's made of?" Garrus said with a shrug.

Wrex started to comment, but the elevator shuddered, almost knocking them off their feet as it ground and screeched its way to a halt, sparks flying. The door opened, but they hadn't quite reached the base. Close enough to jump though.

"I guess this is our stop."

Shepard jumped down, followed quickly by her team. Garrus twitched.

"Anyone else hear that?"

Shepard listened for a moment. Someone was yelling, but it was muffled. Jogging down the ramp, she saw an Asari....floating...behind the barrier. _Great, definitely need to find a way through._

"Can you hear me out there?!" 

Shepard flinched, glancing around to see if anyone else had heard, but thankfully didn't spot any geth and her visor said the same. She glanced to Garrus, but he shook his head. Nope, no geth active within even his hearing. She turned back to the barrier, nodding to the asari within.

"You Doctor T'soni?"

Her eyes widened in obvious surprise at the question.

"Yes, you came looking for me? Thank the Goddess! I thought I'd be stuck here forever. Look, this thing I'm in is part of the prothean security. I must have accidently triggered it when I turned on the barrier. I can't move, you'll have to get me out, but the only switch is here."

"Any suggestions?" Shepard asked in exasperation, cocking an eyebrow. _I've trapped myself behind an impenetrable barrier and I need you to get through it? ...smart_. 

"Ummm..." T'soni seemed to consider for a moment before meeting her eyes sheepishly. _How old is she?!_ "There's some mining equipment. You might be able to use the laser to get through the lower levels. Be careful though. There are still geth and they have a krogan with them."

"Well, good thing I brought mine. Stay here" 

Garrus chuckled behind her as the doctor stared at her for a moment before replying.

"I'll make sure not to go anywhere."

Motioning them down the ramp, her visor flickered. 

"More geth" she whispered. Garrus and Wrex nodded, tightening talons on their weapons. The crack of a shot rang out, causing her shields to flicker as they absorbed it. Shepard ran down the ramp, crouching behind some of the rubble as her feet hit solid ground, joined a moment later by Garrus as his armor clacked against the stone. Wrex charged around the corner, sounding like an angry bear as he attacked them head on. She shook her head in amusement, meeting Garrus's eye as she popped up to take aim over the boulder.

"He really doesn't know how to duck, does he?" The gun jumped in her grasp as she fired on a trooper caught between shields, slicing through his armor with a mechanical squeal. 

The whoosh of a rocket launcher caught her attention. Garrus was lining up another shot, but yelped when she snagged his armor cowl and yanked him down, a rocket screaming through where his head would have been to explode in a shower of rock and flame behind them. He shook his head before nodding to her in thanks.

"He might not be the only one." 

Working together, they quickly whittled down the rocket trooper's shield, the final crack of Garrus's rifle knocking its head back as it collapsed. The last echoes of the fight reverberated off the walls before silence once more filled the chamber. Shepard smacked him on the arm.

"Dang it. Stole my kill, Vakarian!" 

"Shoot faster next time, Shepard." He smirked down at her.

Wrex tromped back to them, kicking geth parts out of his was as he went.

"You two done yet?" He rumbled as he reached their side.

"Mmmm...Maybe in a little bit." She chuckled, but quickly became more serious. "Take a look around. I want to know if any survivors may be hiding." 

They split up, looking through the area, in each nook and cranny, hoping for even one. Shepard turned one corner and growled, fingers clenching around her rifle in absolute fury. The archeologists must have run, ending up in the far corner of the cave system with nowhere to go. Geth showed no mercy. 

Dead, bodies left to rot where they had fallen as they tried to scale walls to escape. Asari, humans, even a turian, lay on the ground in their own multicolored, congealing blood like so much garbage to be disposed of. Her hands shook as she turned from them, burning with anger over the loss and waste, knowing there was nothing she could do. Maybe they could come back and show them the respect they deserved.

She twitched as the Garrus's voice came over the comm. _Darn it! Even when he's not here, he sneaks up on me!_

"Shepard, I found someone." 

Jogging towards his location, she saw Wrex already approaching Garrus by a collapsed small prefab, probably a lab or workspace, which he was helping a woman from. A rock fall had collapsed over it, partially crushing the structure and hiding it from view, which may have just saved her life. The woman must have been a scientist in another field, not an archeologist, if her coat was anything to go by, a very dirty coat, but still.

Shepard examined her as she approached. The woman didn't look too injured, she held her arm close to her body, but was mainly just bruised and terrified, dark hair messy and covered in dust. "Well hello, Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy. We saw you had a bit of a geth problem and decided to help. You are?"

The woman straightened, smoothing down what was left of her coat before answering.

"Dr. Bryson. I was here to study the protheans and their technology, hopefully to better understand how the beacons they've left work. I was going over some of my notes out of the way when those...things...attacked. An explosion collapsed the wall. I wasn't badly hurt, but was trapped. By the time I could possibly get out..." She glanced down, eyes misting over as she remembered. "They killed them all, didn't they?"

"We've only found one other alive....I found the bodies of the rest I think."

Bryson nodded.

"By the time I could move, it sounded as if there was nothing I could do and it seemed...prudent...that I not make myself known. I'm surprised the Alliance got someone here so fast." Glancing at Garrus and Wrex, she added "They usually don't employ other races either."

"I'm here from the Council. We were trying to find Dr T'soni and actually didn't know about the geth until we arrived. We still have to find a way to get into the ruins and get you and her out of course."

"She's alive!? At least someone else made it. I think I'll stay with you until we get out, if that's alright. You seem like better protection than hiding in the dark."

Shepard nodded, motioning to Wrex.

"Wrex here can keep you safe while we work on getting into the ruins. Garrus, come with me." 

The Krogan grumbled, but quieted as she glared up at him. They followed at a distance as Shepard approached the mining laser.

"Think you can get it up, Garrus? You're skill with tech is probably better than mine."

He nodded and, opening his omnitool, began hacking the block on the machine. Keeping an eye out while he worked, Shepard saw a section of heavy pipe nearby, about the length of her arm, sticking out of a pile of scrap. _Hmmm...looks about perfect._ Picking it up, she swung it a little, feeling the weight. Yup, just right for what she wanted. Wrex rumbled curiously as he watched, but didn't ask as she went back to Garrus with her find. She'd just about reached him when a loud whine filled the air as the machine powered up. A bright, hot beam shot forward, vaporizing stone at the base of the ruin to leave a large, very warm, hole into the interior. She swapped the pipe to her other hand to pat him on the back as she clipped it to her armor. 

"Much faster than I probably would have managed and gave us a way in. Awesome!"

Making sure that Bryson and Wrex still followed, Bryson stumbling over rubble on her way down, Shepard entered the ruins to find herself in a round room, dark except for the eerie green pad before them on a central column. As her eyes followed the path of the support upward, she realized as she gaped upwards that the space was far larger than she had anticipated, rings glowing with white light continuing at regular intervals as far as she could see. _This might go all the way through to the surface._

"An elevator?" She moved to examine the pad. "Well, if it has power for barriers, it has power for elevators." She moved to press her fingers to it, but they passed right through. _Holographic, like one of our own._ It showed only a blinking icon. Slightly nervous and hoping they weren't going to blow themselves up with millennia old technology, she tapped it. They all stumbled, having to brace as the room shuddered. A vibration rumbling through their feet as the whole floor slowly rose with a reverberating hum. It stopped after only a few moments, conveniently, right where T'soni was trapped, hovering in midair. _Ding! Floor two: strange, floating scientists._ Doctor T'soni tried to turn her head, just barely able to glance behind her.

"You made it." She sighed in relief.

"Yup, that mining laser did the trick." Shepard walked over to the console and stared at it in confusion. What was with protheans and the creepy, eerie green color? Plus, everything was in some language that apparently didn't translate. _Probably prothean, yay me._ Still, there was one option on the screen that was larger and glowing brighter than the rest. She shrugged. _Worth a shot._ As she touched it, there was a thrum through the air and the sound of something unseen powering down. 

_Thump!_

T'soni pulled herself from the floor, hands automatically smoothing down her shirt as she stood, turning to look at them.

"Thank the Goddess. I really was starting to wonder if I would just hang there until either I starved to death or the geth got through. Can you believe it? Geth...beyond the veil!" Her eyes shined with excitement, apparently temporarily forgetting the danger posed by them. 

Shepard rolled her eyes skyward with a brief prayer for patience. Scientists! Forgetting the danger posed by a threat due to fascination would get her killed.

"Oh I can believe it alright. I've already fought them once. They're ruthless and deadly." _Focus, lady! They just killed all but one of your fellows!_ She slowly ran a hand over her hair, wincing at the gritty dusty texture, before turning back to the elevator platform. "Now let's bug out before they realize the barrier's down and cut us off."

Liara ran ahead of her to the console, already pulling up features she hadn't seen previously. The floor shuddered again, dust falling from above, but the elevator didn't budge. Liara glanced at them nervously.

"That....wasn't me."

Shepard almost fell to her knees as a hard tremor shook the structure, a blast of heat flowing from the cave behind them. She pulled herself from the trembling floor, seeing Wrex hold out a hand to Bryson as Garrus and Liara braced against the console. 

"Get us out of here!" 

Liara quickly tapped at the device and the elevator began to rise, haltingly towards the surface. Turning her head, she met Shepard's gaze, fear finally showing in her eyes.

"The mining laser must have destabilized the ruin! It wasn't especially stable to begin with!"

Garrus mandibles were tight as he slowly closed his eyes, shaking his head.

"Now she tells us."

They were nearing the next level when the whole tube began to shake harder.

"Be ready to get off, I don't want this to fall. Liara, can you hold a barrier?"

"Not for long."

"Stick with Wrex. Hold it for as long as you can if we confront any geth on the way. Wrex will reinforce you."

Shepard pulled her rifle as the elevator slowed to a stop. Liara tapped one last button, and solid thunks reverberated around the perimeter as the platform steadied, apparently having been locked into place. The walls shook violently as the team bolted for the entrance.

They slid to a stop before they even reached it, their path to safety already cut off.

The krogan sneered at them as several geth lined up behind him. Shepard recognized the crimson plating of a rocket trooper among the group and nearly groaned. _A rocketeer, krogan, and their backup....just my luck._ Casting a glance to Wrex, he met her eyes and nodded. As he backed up with the two scientists, she felt the prickle of biotics marking him setting a barrier.

"Run...or don't. That would be more fun." The strange krogan rumbled before them.

"Hey doofus!" She shouted at the krogan who was obviously in charge here. "In case you haven't noticed, we're soon to be in a newly active volcano!!" But the krogan just grinned like an idiot.

"I know, thrilling isn't it?" 

This guy obviously wasn't Saren's smartest soldier...he seriously needed to consider upgrading. 

"Forget this!!" Shepard opened fire on the rocket trooper as she sprang to the side, trying to reach one of the room supports for cover. She just barely noticed Garrus do the same as the geth's head snapped back with a shower of sparks and squeal of damaged electronics before it fell to the ground. 

Even with the good start, the fight quickly became the oddest game of cat and mouse that she had probably ever seen, geth and krogan chasing them around the room as they all tried to take down the other. Taking cover behind a support, chips of stone raining down as the geth fired on her, Shepard watched as Garrus used the distraction to jump up, assault rifle in his claws, and whittle down its shields. _Must be too close quarters for the sniper._ The geth switched its attention to the visible threat, making him duck down. Standing, she rested over the support just in time to catch the one he'd been working on, blowing out it's flashlight before its shields could recover.

"HEY!"

As she took shelter again, she pointed at him across the room.

"Ha ha! REVENGE VAKARIAN!" Teasing him, she saw his eyes widen, looking not at her, but behind her. Glancing back, she found herself face to face with an enraged dinosaur just as he lunged for her. 

With a yelp of surprise, she rolled out of the way of his grasping talons with inches to spare. Thankfully, Garrus had the last geth occupied as she’d rolled into the open. The krogan squared off again. His shields were still too high to have any chance of getting through with her firearms; she'd have to be creative. Thankfully the idiot was so angry that he wasn't even trying to use his shotgun. Sliding one of her blades free from its sheath, she waited for the lunge. She didn't have to wait long. He tried to tackle her, but misjudged her height. Going low, she swept past his outstretched arms, blade whipping towards her target as she spun. He roared as it bit deep into his shoulder joint as she went. If she remembered correctly....yup. Her visor read a drop in his shields immediately. She'd severed a cable to the power source and managed to really PISS HIM OFF. Turning, she sprinted for the other side, getting as much distance as possible. 

"Got the last geth, Shepard. Just your guy now." Man was she glad to hear that voice right now.

"Okay Garrus, I'm going to try something. It should give you a shot, just...don't shoot me." She heard his snort through the comms.

"As if, but be careful." 

Sliding the blade home, Shepard slid to a stop as she slipped the pipe she'd picked up from her armor and held it loosely at her side. Spinning back towards him, she began to slowly circle the room, making sure he copied the motion from where he was pacing the other side. She must have cut more deeply than she thought, the arm hung awkwardly and orange blood dripped steadily from his fingers to stain the floor. Still, it would heal quickly. 

Judging to be far enough, she paused as she glanced to the side, giving an opening. With an earth shattering roar, he thundered towards her across the small space. Timing him, she gripped the pipe hard....and swung with all her might.

_THWUMP!_

It felt like hitting a sand bag for all the give that his flesh had, but the effect was immediate. As the bar connected with his snout, right under the crest, he yelped like a kicked hound and nearly went cross eyed with pain. But she was too slow. Several hundred pounds of injured krogan slammed her backwards as he fell, knocking her into one of the supports with a crack that made her head spin. The boom of a rifle reverberated behind her as Garrus took the shot through the last wisps of his shields, cracking the krogan's crest in a perfect headshot. 

Her ears were ringing from the shot, but at least he was able to get it. Grabbing the support, she pulled herself from the floor only to have the room spin around her as pain pulsed through her head. She started slipped sideways, unable to catch herself, but felt arms grab her from behind.

"Whoa! You okay? That was a hard hit, Shepard." Garrus eyes looked concerned as he looked down at her. 

"Room moving....need to run." She tried to push him off, but stumbled, making his arms tighten instead. "Wrex! Grab blue lady and....other one. Need to leave." Her tongue felt thick as she tried to yell directions to the krogan already running towards the exit with a scientist under each arm. "Joker! Need quick pick up. Volcano's exploding." Trying to push Garrus off again, he shook his head and scooped her up.

"You're not going to get far in this condition, Shepard." He was already running after Wrex as fast as his long legs could take them. She gagged at the motion, feeling sick, and tried to wiggle free again.

"I can run! Put me down!" For goodness sakes! She wasn’t some damsel in distress, but he just kept running, footsteps clanging against the metal grates. When she wiggled again, he glared at her.

"So help me, Shepard. Hold still or I will drop you in the volcano!" 

She stilled, just looking at him as he ran through the last tunnel. They launched out of the tube just as the ruins collapsed, sending a blast of dusty hot air after them. The Normandy was already waiting for them.

Joker came over the comm as Garrus joined Wrex on the ramp.

"Ummm...Commander, you usually want to wait until after the mission to break out the alcohol. Just saying.”

"She cracked her head a bit hard, Joker. Tell Chakwas we're coming up and pick up the Mako if you can." Garrus shifted her to tap his omnitool, sending coordinates for the vehicle as he walked to the elevator. Shepard flailed again.

"Put me DOWN!"

"Can you get to med bay on your own?" She paused in trying to get free at that.

"Ummmmm....yes?" She grinned up at him innocently, but his narrowed eyes seemed to say he wasn't buying it for a second. 

"You know, your eyes are really pretty. Wait....what? What the heck? Ohhh that was not supposed to be out loud. I'm thinkin out loud. That's not good." Shepard shook her head to clear it, but groaned as pain exploded behind her eyes. "Don't feel so hot."

Garrus sighed and shook his head.

"Spirits, you're stubborn. I'm taking you to med bay. You'll just have to deal with it."

She heard Wrex chuckle behind them as they walked away.

"Crazy human."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two in one night! Whoop whoop! Hopefully you like them. Oh, and yes, I brought Anne Bryson out! Awesome! I mean, did that look like a couple months of research in ME3? Nope, but a couple years? Okay. Plus I hated that they didn't find anyone besides Liara. They hardly even tried....and now they did. 
> 
> Same as always, I always want feedback. New writer, so advice is super appreciated! 
> 
> Thanks🙌


	14. Inner Demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One busted head and scolding from Chakwas later and Shepard finally gets to see what they've gotten. A young Asari scientist and a human specializing in communication, not much really. So, when Liara says she may be able to clear up the vision by joining Shepard's mind, she's willing to take the chance.
> 
> But they both get more than they bargained for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, warning in advance for possible triggers, there are scenes involving child abuse and domestic violence situations in this one. I've marked them so that those areas can be skipped if you need to.

You really should learn to wear a helmet, Commander.” Shepard winced as Chakwas shined a light into her face, blinding her and sending searing pain through her head. She shoved it away, glaring at her attacker.

“I hate them! They restrict peripheral vision, make breathing more difficult, interfere with my visor, and are way too claustrophobic!” Chakwas glared at her, hands on her hips and looking for all the world like a mother scolding a stubborn child.

“Well, you now get to be pulled from active duty for a couple of days due to your dislike for protective headgear. You have a concussion. It doesn’t look like you fractured or broke your head thankfully, but it’s still not made for slamming into walls.”

“WHAT!? I’m Commander of this ship, that’s mutiny! You can’t pull me off the ground! The galaxy is at stake here!” Shepard exclaimed as she waved her arms, but Chakwas wasn’t standing down this time. 

“I can and I just did. Medical Officer trumps Captain in this instance and you know it. The galaxy will have to hold itself together for two days until you aren’t going to pass out or hurt yourself on a mission. Just be happy that I’m not restricting you to your cabin for that time.” Seeing her expression, Chakwas sighed. “Look, you still need to talk to our scientists, see what they have and plan further. Even travel will take at least a day. You can still work on the ship, just not beat krogan with your bare hands.”

Shepard heard a low chuckle and glared at Garrus, leaning against the door frame of the med bay, as she pulled herself off the bed and to her feet. She didn’t even stumble…much.

“Fine….and it wasn’t with my bare hands anyway.”

“Close enough, Shepard.” Garrus voice rumbled, amused at the situation.

“Shut up…Joker, I know you’re listening anyway, call the ground teams to the meeting room and have someone bring T’soni and Bryson.” There was a click as Joker shut off the comm, hopefully at least a little embarrassed at getting caught, but that was probably hoping for too much from him. Shepard narrowed her eyes at Garrus as she stomped out the door, but could hear his amused rumble as he followed her upstairs.

She was surprised to find most of them already there, apparently waiting for her to get out of med bay. Taking a seat, she waited a few minutes for them to be joined by the last few, Tali drifting in last, apparently having been working when the call came through. Of course, Joker had to get a few words in before they even started, his sarcastic remarks echoing from the comm speakers.

“Too close Commander. Ten more seconds and we would have been swimming in molten sulfur. The Normandy isn’t equipped to land in exploding volcanoes. They tend to fry our sensors and melt our hull, just for future reference.”

She glared even as Doctor T’soni scoffed in disgust.

“We almost died in there and your pilot is making jokes?”

Shepard took a breath, letting it out with a sigh.

“Joker saved our butts. I’ll let him have a few jokes. Plus, it’s just his way. If you can’t take jokes in poor taste, don’t spend much time with him.” Liara looked confused, but nodded in acceptance.

“I see. It must be a human thing. I’m afraid I don’t have a lot of experience with your species, though I’m grateful for the chance to. You saved my life back there, both from the volcano and the geth. They would have killed me, or dragged me off to Saren." Her voice was smooth, calm, and soothing. It was a distinct difference from other asari voices that sometimes grated on her nerves. She seemed more...reserved. As if...timid? No, that wasn't the right word. 

_Wait, no, stop analyzing voices. Wait, did she mention Saren?_

Shepard was surprised. She knew Saren was after her, that the geth worked for him. Did she already know of her mother’s involvement with the ex-spectre?

“Well, it wasn’t entirely selfless. Your mother, Matriarch Benezia, is working with Saren. They’re searching for something called the conduit. Do you know it?”

“Only that it was somehow connected to the prothean extinction. That is my area of expertise. I have spent the last fifty years studying and searching to find out what happened to them.”

_Well, that answers that question. She didn’t even flinch when I mentioned Benezia._ Shepard cocked an eyebrow at the number she gave.

“Fifty years? How old are you?”

“I’m only a hundred and six, barely considered more than a child among my race. It’s why most of my research has been ignored.”

Ashley coughed, covering a laugh.

“Damn, I hope I look that good at your age.”

Shepard nodded to herself, unsurprised by the revelation. In some ways, Liara seemed very mature and like a full adult, but at times she seemed very naïve and flighty. Maybe timid WAS the right word.

“The protheans were destroyed by a race of machines, the reapers. We don’t know what the conduit does, but Saren seems to believe it will bring them back.”

Liara looked stunned at the revelation and horrified. 

“How do you know this?! I’ve found no mention of reapers, just small clues and hints towards a cycle of destruction.”

“In our first encounter, he activated a prothean beacon. It was damaged, but still somewhat functional. It grabbed me and passed on what it could through visions. Unfortunately it was unable to pass them in a very understandable fashion, probably caused by the damage. It self destructed as soon as it gave what it could, so we can’t try to get a better answer.”

“Wait Commander, you interfaced directly with a working beacon? Visions sound odd, but considering the bits I’ve found on how they communicate, store information, and transmit it, it would make sense. Still, they aren’t made to connect to a human mind. It’s a miracle you weren’t killed.” Doctor Bryson was shocked. Such an encounter was unheard of in her area of expertise.

“Wait…if you were given visions, I may be able to help clear them, or at least give a second perspective.”

Shepard looked to Liara. “How?”

“I can join my mind with yours and view them myself.”

“No way!” Kaiden cut in, suspicion showing in his expression. “How can we trust you? Your mother works for the person we’re hunting. How do we know this isn’t some sort of trap to hurt the Commander?”

“I am not my mother! I don’t know why she would work for Saren, but I have not even spoken to her in years.” Liara looked furious, glaring at Kaiden defiantly.

He scoffed in disbelief, but Shepard looked at her. She could understand this completely. A child should never be blamed for the actions of a parent and could cut off a parent who was less than healthy. She believed her. 

“Actually Kaiden, it may not be a bad idea. She would get a look at the beacon’s message, possibly getting a better understanding of it. We know she’s not working with Saren. That krogan was awfully eager to kill a useful ally. Saren wants her dead or alive, which means he doesn’t have her yet and I would like to keep it that way.” Kaiden started to protest, but paused, looking thoughtful. Shepard knew it was probably the best option right now, but to let someone dig around in her head…

“I need to know. What will you see in my mind?”

“Only what you choose to show. I won’t dig any deeper and you can block me if you don’t want me to see something, shutting down any thoughts that you do not want me to know.”

“Shepard, your head….”

She glared at Garrus for the reminder, but knew he was right.

“Would a mild head injury cause any complications?”

“Not if you don’t struggle too hard against the bond. Even then, it would not do any lasting damage.”

She heard Wrex growl under his breath, but nodded acceptance. 

“Very well, we need what information we can get. But, “Shepard narrowed her eyes, pointing at Liara threateningly, voice dropping to a growl as she stared her down “there are things in my head that belong to me alone. Dig deeper than I want and I will not hesitate to shoot you and throw you out the airlock.” She shrugged. “Where and when would be up to me of course.”

Liara swallowed, but nodded. Getting to her feet, she approached to stand before Shepard. 

“I will be as careful as I can.” Putting a hand on either side of her face, Liara stared deeply into Shepard’s eyes. She could feel herself being drawn in to the Asari’s gaze. Liara took a deep breath and Shepard felt herself copy the motion. Liara slowly closed her eyes, then flashed them open, revealing midnight depths “Embrace eternity.” Shepard’s world went dark.

……

Everything was black. Her heart began to pound in panic, but slowed as a cool breeze blew across her face. She smelled green and growing things, something she could rarely enjoy in her life. Bird song swelled to fill the air. As light bloomed, she realized her eyes were closed. Opening them, she found herself still looking into Liara’s eyes, though no longer black. Tearing her gaze away, she gasped at their surroundings.

It looked like something she’d only seen in books and her own dreams. Ancient trees, large enough for several people to not be able to encompass, crooked branches raised to the sky, close enough to always reach to touch the next tree, far enough to allow shafts of golden light through to illuminate the forest floor. Wild animals raced through the brush as birds flitted from tree to tree, songs echoing under the high forest canopy. A sparrow raced past her, making her turn her head to follow it. She frowned at the sudden movement. Her head and body felt odd, not wrong, but different. Her head felt heavier somehow, but completely natural. It was hard to explain, even in her own mind. _In my own mind…ha._

“Impressive” 

Turning back to Liara, she found her not watching the scenery, but herself. 

“What?”

“Um…that thing on your armor, I noticed it when I saw you outside the barrier, but thought nothing of it. That creature is not just for looks, is it?”

“No…” She drew out the syllable, watching the asari warily, trying to figure out what she was talking about. “why?”

“Well, just look at you.” She waved a hand at her, gesturing to her whole body. “I heard of such things, but I've never had the opportunity to SEE it.”

Confused, she looked down at herself and gasped in surprise.

She was still wearing her uniform, but that was almost where the similarities ended. Where the sleeves of her shirt ended, her arms were not the pale skin she expected, but golden scales the exact color and pattern of the dragon she bore, down to the black claws that grew from her fingertips. Lifting her hand, she ran it over her scalp and found not hair, but eerily familiar spines and horns. Her eyes widened as she felt a twitch behind her. She spun in place, and felt a long flexible tail flow with her even as wings fluttered in the breeze only to nestle back into place along her spine. Somehow though, for all that she felt amazed at the changes, everything felt completely normal, as if this is how she’d always been. She’d taken such a creature as her symbol since she felt a kinship to it, even using it to draw strength and courage from when she was younger, but this was something else entirely. Her tail lashed involuntarily behind her as she turned back to Liara with wide eyes.

“What’s happened to me? What is this place?”

“The mind is a complex thing. It subconsciously chooses a form that its mental map should take. Mine looks very much like a university library, organized and meticulous. If I were to show you something in my mind, we would appear in that world. Your mind is very different, chaotic, but beautiful in its own way. In my mind, I would appear much the same as I do regularly. My mental self image is very similar to my physical one. Your self-image is very different, and this subconscious world allows you to give it the form that it sees. This is you….as your mind sees you. It’s something that, while not common, is not especially rare either. Most often, it’s people who’ve had great trauma to the mind that experience this kind of….disconnect.”

Shepard shook her head, choosing to ignore it for the meantime. Looking again to the glade around them, she was surprised to find that she already knew what she was looking at. 

Information….each of these massive trees was a store of information that she knew, touching branches where her thoughts and knowledge overlapped. Holding out her hand, a titmouse landed on her golden fingertips, fluffing it’s soft grey feathers, and a song slipped into her mind, music quiet for a moment until the bird flitted off; small bits of random thoughts or memory. Somehow she automatically knew that the larger or more special the creature, the more important the memory.

“How do we find the beacon in all of this?”

“Well,” Liara paused in thought. “Supposedly if you think about it or try to remember it, it will come to us.”

“Supposedly?” Shepard raised a ridged eyebrow at her. “You have done this before, haven’t you?”

“Ummm…no.” Liara looked nervous at the admission, but Shepard just sighed. _Figures. Well, it’s worth a shot._

Closing her eyes, she considered the visions, the feeling of fear, the sight of flames and death. The air cooled against her scales and the world darkened behind her lids as it felt like the sky clouded over. Feeling Liara take a step back with a gasp of fear, she opened her eyes. The shadows had deepened as a strong wind blew through the tree tops, the world looking as though preparing for a storm, but their visitor took the real attention. A glowing white mare stepped through the bushes to stand before them, glazed and unseeing eyes staring straight through them. She was thin, painfully so with ribs and hip bones pressing through her thin coat. Fine wisps of smoke coiled over her hooves and mane. Shepard chuffed in amusement, a sound she was surprised to hear herself make. _How cliché, everybody always gets it wrong._

“A nightmare, that figures.” The creatures head swung towards her, milky eyes blinking slowly as she whickered and pricked her ears. 

“A bad dream? Is this creature safe?” Liara looked very nervous of the strange animal.

“Physically?….yes. Mentally is another matter.” Still, she had what they needed. “What do I do to share it with you?”

Liara stepped closer, holding out her hand. Shepard clasped it, making sure her claws didn’t break her skin.

“There, as long as I hold you, I see what you see. If you touch it, the beacon should trigger.”

****Trigger Warning!!! If you are sensitive to dark content particularly involving child abuse please skip ahead****

Shepard nodded, and then reached a hand to the nightmare, holding her hand close to her muzzle. The creature’s nostrils flared as she nudged forward, meeting fingertips with her velvety nose. Shepard gasped, feeling herself sink into the visions even as something dug into her calf from behind, drawing blood with a flash of pain.

The vision tore through her mind, heat skating across her nerves, screams ripping though her head as the images poured through too quickly to make much sense of. People running, mechanical beings attacking, a ship like Saren’s spreading tentacles to engulf. Pain, fear, and death echoed through every moment. Then, a world, rimmed with light, like the dawn over the horizon. The visions felt like they took hours as death consumed and overwhelmed them, and no time at all. She could feel Liara sharing them, burdened by the sheer weight of a message that could not be completely understood. There was so much pain, so much death, people killed or twisted to some horrible purpose. 

_Some things are worse than death._ Shepard recalled her words from what seemed so long ago, but only a few days in the past. 

The last vestiges of the vision seemed to flicker, fading to leave only the dark and the silence. Thinking it was over, Shepard relaxed, letting out a breath, but wondered why the trees did not return.

Slowly light returned, but not on the scene she expected. She felt Liara’s surprise and confusion even as she saw and felt only dread, attempting to step back, but unable to truly move from the scene. She knew this place and did not wish to be here. She had never wanted to return here again. 

They were in a child’s room, immaculate as almost no child’s would be. Off-white walls, white shelves with perfectly lined up books, a bed, perfectly made with a bedspread in muted colors. There was a small, red-headed girl sitting on the bed, sunlight streaming through windows to light up the space. Even as she saw her, Shepard’s view shifted and Liara’s with it. 

The comforter was soft underneath her as she stared at her hands, tiny in her small lap. The sound of a door opening came from far away and her young heart raced even as she held her calm close, like a warm blanket. A man’s voice sounded muffled through the door of the room, asking a question. Another answered softly, but his voice rose, yelling unintelligible words. Shepard pulled, desperately trying to escape from the scene, but could not. A voice spoke defensively. The sharp smack of flesh on flesh, a cry of pain. Shepard screamed silently against it. _Let me out, let me out!!_ The little girl just stood, seemingly ignorant of her cries, walking to a shelf to pull down one of the books, pages frayed and battered with use. Sliding to the rough carpet between the side of the bed and the wall, she opened the pages and began to read as the man bellowed fury through the building, sounds of breaking and shouts of pain and fear drifting through her closed door. As she looked to the pages of the book, shouts of rage were replaced by the screams of an angry dragon, cries of pain by cries of fear as he burned all in his path, wings wide on the wind. A scene began to play in her mind’s eye, banishing the room and the voices to be replaced by strange companions in a lonely mountain. A single tear splashed to the page, interrupting the image, but the child did not even wipe it away, simply sank into her imagined world as her own faded away.

Shepard kept tugging, desperately trying to break the grip of memory even as the image swirled away, only to be replaced by another.

She stared at the ground at her feet, carpet before an open door. A woman turned to leave, pulling the door behind her.

“Can’t I go with you?” She heard her voice say, a young girl still.

The woman paused as she shook her head. 

“I’ll be back soon. I just need to do a few things. I’ll return in a few hours.”

“But I want to go.”

The woman raised her chin to meet her eyes. Her face was strangely blurred as her eyes refused to focus on her features.

“Why? It’s just some boring errands.” Pulling her chin free, the girl’s eyes drifted back to the floor as the emptiness inside threatened to consume her. _Don’t tell….you must never tell._

“No reason. I just miss you.”

Almost as if watching from outside, she felt a man’s large hand land on her, gripping her shoulder. It felt hollow, as if happening to someone else even as it was her own muscle and bone gripped in his large fingers. She cringed from the touch internally, skin crawling to get away even as she stood without flinching under the hand.

“Don’t worry, we’ll be fine. Just go do your errands and we’ll be here when you get back.”

The other nodded, closing the door after her. The hand tightened on her shoulder even as he turned her toward the stairs and gave her a push. 

“Go on, I’ll be there in a minute.”

Shepard’s heart pounded even as she tore at the connection, raging against her bonds. She would not relive this. _LET ME OUT!_ She snarled and raged, but could feel Liara’s helplessness as she was swept along with the same memories. They came faster now. Flashes of fear, pushed deep until only the void remained. _To cry was weak, useless. To be scared was cowardly_. A touch, gentle even as it fractured a child’s soul and mind. Promises given, but swiftly broken _I’ll never hurt them again, just do what I ask_. Hard hands grip her shirt, lifting from the floor in rage at some imagined slight. Tears sliding down cheeks in the night as she sat looking to the silver moon through windows of a prison she could not escape. Pain, fear, doubt, helplessness, swirled in a dark vortex that threatened to pull her under, while the exterior never wavered or showed any emotion at all.

Memory after memory swept past, too fast to keep track of each, before they swirled together to materialize into one room, a room she knew well and never wanted to be trapped in again. A bedroom, bright and simple, filled with sunlight that could not lessen her terror.

_NO! I will not! Not like this!_

******End of Traumatic Scene******

Shepard flailed in her mind, searching for the connection. Mental hands closed over a chord, feeling her connection to Liara thrum through it. If she could not escape the memory, she could at least banish HER from it. Baring her new talons, she tore at the bond, shredding it under her claws, ripping at it with everything she had. 

_No!_ She felt Liara struggle, trying to stop her, but kept tearing. _Stop, you’ll hurt yourself!_

Finally, the last thread parted, dropping Liara from her mind, but leaving her trapped. The door to the room began to open and she curled into herself in the child’s hollow mind, trying unsuccessfully to distance herself from what she knew was coming.

……

Liara’s eyes snapped open as she fell back to hit the hard floor of the meeting room with a hard smack She felt blood drip over her lip as she fought the unconsciousness that threatened. Voices cried out in surprise as she surged back to her feet, trying to get to Shepard sitting limp in her chair, head dropped to her chest as if sleeping. The one called Ashley grabbed her from behind.

“No! I have to get to her! She broke the connection. She’s trapped in there and can’t pull herself out!”

Surging forward in Ashley’s grip, her head pulsed hard and she fell, everything going black as the floor rushed to meet her.

……

******Trigger Warning: If you are sensitive to dark content particularly involving child abuse please skip ahead (Again).******

Shepard rocked back and forth in her younger mind, crying to whoever might hear. _No no no no no. Don’t make me relive this._ A distant rumble of hooves against the earth, an angry animal scream, whispered through her mind. She turned, tracking to find it. A way out maybe? But her ray of hope quickly crumbled into dust.

“Hello lil’ bit.” 

Shepard shivered in disgust at the voice, a voice she’d hoped to never hear again. A flicker of something besides her fear sparked to life, fanned by long ago pain made new. Anger. It bloomed inside like a rare, bright flower as she clutched at it, holding it close against the dark. He opened the door, footsteps bringing him to stand before her child self as she stared at the floor. His rough hand wrapped around her small chin as she was forced to meet the long ago eyes of her tormenter, sickeningly the same color as her own, and the flames grew. This monster in human skin DARED to come against her again, even in her own mind. Wings curled invisibly around her, sheltering the flames from winds of her fear as the fire grew. When he yanked her closer, inside she SNARLED, wings unfurling, drifting open as the fire spread. 

A shudder pass through the world, a distant enraged scream leaking through the cracks to be drowned by the vision itself. 

“Now why would my lil’ petal hide such a pretty face from me.”

Her child self finally reacted, pulling against the fingers on her face, but they tightened, holding her still as his disgusting lips met her own. Shepard roared in silent fury, wings thrown wide as the nurtured flame exploded outward against the walls of her invisible cage, the vision shaking as cracks widened, pushed open by the sheer force of her rage. 

_How DARE he! I was a child then! I was helpless then! I was small then!....I AM NO LONGER!!_

******End of Triggering Scene******

She felt the cracks splinter under the heat of the furnace that beat against her cage even as something else hit it outside, pushing cracks too far.

They gave way.

With a shattering boom like thunder, fire exploded outward into a clear forest, nightmare screaming shrilly in pain as her flesh burned even as the fire died down. Shepard gasped for air, dropping to her knees in the grass, cool and wet under her hands, as what had happened hit her all at once….Still… _Stupid! So stupid! That’s the mare…WHERE’S THE DEMON?!_ Her head whipped up, fire mostly contained once more, but still burning inside, only to blink in surprise. That…wasn’t right. 

Looking up, she’d found herself meeting the eyes of something she wasn’t expecting. The true Mare, maybe, but this massive, royal stag? Even as she met his warm eyes, they flashed cold. His head raised in the ethereal scream she’d heard moments before even as his hooves struck earth, launching him towards her. 

“AH!” She rolled, feeling a sharp _RIIIP!_ of pain from behind even as she rolled on her wings, pain flaring from the new bones. The earth shook, but he never connected, simply leaping over her prone body towards something else, already slashing with razor sharp hooves even as he screamed fury to the wind. She looked back in wonder as he stormed and slashed at a misshapen, ugly ape-like creature. _Gotcha!_ Small and angry with long, wicked claws that she saw were stained with her blood, it bared sharp, crooked teeth at the stag as its face scrunched in a disgusting look of fear and anger; the true Mare, the true danger of the Night Mare. This was her mind, and she knew the myths if others didn’t. Of course there would be both parts of the Night Mare. Looking to her once more, greed in its beady black eyes as she studied it cautiously, it fled. It ran into the wood, grabbing the back of the fleeing mare, her tail still smoking as they slithered through the trees. _Gone._

The stag planted his feet, snorting in disgust after them before turning back to her. She started to cringe back, but froze. This creature was something else, something protective and safe. His cinnamon colored fur looked warm and soft, and meeting his eyes, she felt a smile cross her face. In those eyes shone all the love and acceptance she had ever wanted. The creature lifted his massive antlers high under her scrutiny, looking proud even as she saw a slight twinkle of amusement in his warm, hazel eyes….eyes she knew well. Laughing, she threw her arms around his neck.

“Figures you would come to help me even in my own head, David!”

As he tucked his head over hers, she caught other visions, softer this time. Anderson picking her up off the street to rush to a hospital; the sorrow in his eyes as she shied from his touch in their earlier days; muted fury when she finally began to talk about her past; her first Christmas in his home, his confusion at why she was scared to accept any gift, understanding as she eventually explained; the pride when she completed boot camp, later made N7 ranking, and most recently when she became a Spectre. He was always there when she needed, never wavering even when she retreated out of fear and doubt. 

He was the father she’d always wanted. 

Letting go, she backed up a step, wiping a tear from her cheek. Looking around, she realized she still didn’t know how to leave. She had a mission to complete, a galaxy to save.

“You wouldn’t know how to get out of here, would you?” She felt silly for asking, but somehow it felt right.

He tossed his shaggy head, light glistening off dew in his coat. Stepping daintily closer on small hooves that she knew hid great strength, she reached out her hand to him as she had the nightmare. He looked at her hand for a moment then, shaking his head, brushed past it. Moving slowly, he gently pressed his muzzle to her forehead, breath warm across her skin, and she fell, her forested world falling away.

……

“Shepard!”

She moaned as the shout sent pulses of pain through her. Arms held her, far too familiar after the memories. She flinched away, opening her eyes to the meeting room of the Normandy once again. Some of her team crowded around, concern showing in Garrus, Tali, and Wrex’s eyes, as Kaiden looking down at her nervously. 

With a grunt, she shoved him away and stumbled to her feet. Feeling something wet, she brushed her nose, her hand coming away smeared with crimson. Seeing Ashley and Doctor Bryson nearby, she stumbled over to see Ashley holding Liara on the floor. She was unconscious, a small stream of violet blood dripping from her nose. She grunted in disgust.

“Get her to med bay.” She watched as Ashley stood, taking Liara and heading out the door with Bryson following.

“Shepard?” Garrus’s flanged voice sounded concerned behind her. “We lost you for a minute. Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” She spit back at him, angry over the whole situation. Taking a step towards the door, her head spun, spots of black swirling in her vision as her knees crumpled. Plated arms wrapped around her, holding her from hitting the floor.

“Whoa! I think we can say you are not fine.”

She tried to step back, but her vision went fuzzy, gray leaching in at the edges of her vision as she fought a losing battle against the dark. The world faded completely as she lost her grip on consciousness in Garrus’s arms.

_Not again._

_Chakwas is going to kill me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! How badly has Shepard screwed up this time and what is she going to do to poor Liara? We'll find out later. Now I really wasn't sure how this one would go over and how some of those scenes would affect readers. As usual, shoot me a comment. Something good, something bad, whichever, I'd love to hear from your side of the screen. Oh...and the chapter name, Inner Demons by Julia Brennan, an amazing song.  
> .


	15. Come Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of her meld with T'soni, Shepard is truly at a loss. Thankfully a stubborn friend is more than willing to help get her straightened out....whether she's willing or not.

Shepard’s head hit her desk...again.

 _THUNK!_ OW!

Round and round she went in the quiet of her quarters. It had a couple of DAYS and she still couldn’t get her brain to behave. _What did I do?! Nobody has EVER seen that much of me, even cut off as it was! What will she think?!.....Who will she tell? _The memory of large hands caressing her skin oozed into her mind. Shepard shuddered, rubbing her own hands over the goose bumps as she fought her revulsion, fighting down the need to shower yet again, to wash away the taint. It was long ago, over a decade in fact. Why did it, HE, have to resurface now?!__

___This isn’t working._ _ _

__Shepard shoved her chair back, grabbing it at the last second so it didn’t topple. Righting it again, she turned and stomped from her quarters._ _

__If her mind wouldn’t shut up in the quiet, she would give it something to occupy it._ _

___Have to stay busy._ _ _

___Have to not think._ _ _

__….._ _

__Garrus’s mandibles flared wide as Kaiden steered the Mako back into the cargo bay. He guessed Tali was smiling too, but…the visor. Today had been a great day. It wasn’t every day that you took down a group of pirates and found extra resources at the same time! Sharjila had been an amazing practice drop._ _

__Since Shepard had been removed from active duty for a week after the shocking T’soni Incident, as he called it anyway, she’d been sending different teams on drops to test them, getting them working together smoothly. The last couple had been fairly boring, having found some minerals and artifacts and little else of interest, but today had been far better._ _

__As the Mako locked into place, Garrus unbuckled, letting out a groan as he stood stiffly from the gunner’s chair and made his way out the door. Even as his feet hit the ground, he froze assailed by an unwelcome scent that had him clapping mandibles tightly to his jaw as he breathed through his nose to lessen the effect. Pushing past him as she left Kaiden to make the final checks, Tali glanced at him, confusion in her glowing eyes, only to tense as she followed his gaze._ _

__Shepard was in the cargo bay._ _

__She appeared cheerful, as she had for the last three days, but even Tali could tell it was forced. She may be fooling her crew, but not her friends. She was currently talking with Wrex, but her voice was too high, talking loudly as if to drown someone out as she looked over her armor._ _

__“So, wait, that’s why that trick worked with Saren’s guy!?” She gestured wildly with the hand holding the rag as they watched._ _

__“Yes Shepard, so don’t do it again.” Wrex’s small eyes narrowed as his deep rumble filled the bay. “We have sensitive spots on the upper edge of our noses, heard some researcher call them electrical sensors or something, AND it’s where the crest connects, making it more vulnerable there. It’s dishonorable, dirty fighting….like hitting an unprotected quad.”_ _

__“So you can see electrical signals? How awesome! And freaky…but mainly awesome! How does that work? Is it all krogan? Can other species do it? I wonder what it looks like. How sensitive are you? Could you show me?” She continued rattling off rapid fire questions as Wrex rolled one crimson eye towards Garrus, practically begging for help. Garrus cocked his head in question, but Wrex just rolled his eyes skyward in answer with a tiny shrug. She’d been here a while. Flaring his mandibles slightly, he sucked in a breath, letting the air drift over his tongue and the roof of his mouth before wincing._ _

__The air reeked of strong emotion, permeating the cargo bay. Shepard acted like she was alright, smiling and laughing, carrying on like usual, but her scent screamed otherwise. Sour terror made even breathing through his less sensitive nose cause it to wrinkle in disgust, the sharp bite of anger to burn the tongue, the bitter, acrid stink of depression metallic in his mouth, all saturating the air to create a thick haze of despair around her for anyone with half a nose to smell. Enough was enough. With a cough and shake of the head to clear it, Garrus moved to join them, much to Wrex’s apparent relief as the giant heaved a great sigh. They didn’t know what exactly had happened with T’soni, but Shepard needed help and spirits but Garrus was going to give it, whether she accepted it or not._ _

__For three days, Shepard avoided the asari while her emotional state fluctuated wildly where her nose blind human companions couldn’t sense, and T’soni wasn’t any better. Every time she saw Shepard enter a room, you could see the blood drain from her face before she quietly made excuses, each more ridiculous than the last, to retreat back to her quarters behind med bay. Garrus’s mandibles clacked loudly to his jaw, the sharp sound echoing in the new found silence to draw Shepard’s attention from the poor krogan._ _

__“Garrus!” She gave a broad, ecstatic grin that refused to reach her dark eyes. Her eyes were a different color lately with the change in her mood, storms on the horizon rather than sunny skies, clouded, dark, and ominous. “How was the trip? The comms sounded like you guys had a good time!” Garrus stared down at her as his mandibles snapped sharply again, considering before he spoke with sub harmonics weaving strongly through his voice in displeasure._ _

__“Don’t you think it’s enough Shepard?”_ _

__“Enough?” She cocked her head in confusion, smile sliding from her face as she met his eyes briefly before looking away. “What do you mean?”_ _

__“Be in denial all you want, but I’ve had enough of this, Shepard! You can’t hide from whatever this is that’s been haunting you!” Garrus unconsciously straightened further, becoming taller as she seemed to shrink into herself._ _

__“Not hiding from anything.” She mumbled sullenly under her breath as she resumed polishing the already shining ceramic under her fingers, cloth scraping gently across it._ _

__“Bullshit!” She looked up at him sharply at the growled human curse, taking in his hard eyes and tense posture. He heard Kaiden exit the Mako behind him, but didn’t care. “You’ve been hiding for the past three days behind this fake cheerful mask and it isn’t getting better. You’re going to have to face whatever it is or spirits help me, I’ll…”_ _

__“You’ll what, Vakarian?” Ominous thunderheads roiled in her gaze, distant lightning on the horizon as she glared up at him. “I am Commander of this vessel and as YOUR Commander I give the orders here… so BACK OFF!”_ _

__Garrus lowered his head, sub harmonics clicking in threat as he glared from under lowered brow plates before his mandibles spread in a slow, predatory grin._ _

__“Well, it seems you haven’t realized,” he rumbled as he leaned closer to whisper. “I’m not very good at following orders.” He struck faster than she could believe, talons tangling in her shirt to toss her indignantly over a shoulder before she could blink, breath leaving her in an undignified shout as his armor pinched into her. Shepard struggled against him as he stomped to the elevator, but he had her now, talons pinching slightly as they held her in place. The doors hissed shut on Kaiden’s shocked expression at the strange turn of events._ _

__……._ _

__Tali passed Wrex, clipping up her shotgun as the massive krogan stared after them with an amused expression._ _

__“What the hell was that about?!” Kaiden looked flabbergasted at what had just happened, mouth gaping as he looked from one to the other in complete confusion._ _

__“That,” Tali looked up at him. “Was what I believe I’ve heard called an unstoppable force meeting an immovable object….only the object was movable after all. Keelah, they’re both so stubborn.”_ _

__Wrex rumbled with laughter as he started picking up Shepard’s mess, putting supplies and parts back where they belonged as Kaiden continued to stare dumbfounded at the closed elevator door. Glancing down at the data pad of information she still held, Tali tucked it under her arm as she strode over to tap the button, waiting patiently as the elevator would have to finish its current trip before returning….slowly._ _

__“I’ll just leave this information in her quarters for her to review later.”_ _

__“IS NOBODY GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT?” Kaiden’s shout echoed off the walls as he looked from one to the other for an explanation that didn’t come._ _

__“Nope.” Wrex continued to chuckle under his breath as he shook his huge head._ _

__……_ _

__“PUT ME DOWN YOU…YOU…ARGH!” Shepard struggled against him as the elevator began its slow ascent only for Garrus to do the last thing she expected….Exactly what she demanded._ _

__She hit the hard metal floor with a crash that knocked the wind out of her. Gasping, still attempting to recover, she felt a sharp jab as Garrus poked her in the chest with a talon._ _

__“There, that’s better. Now,” She glared at him as he gave a cocky grin. “Are you going to behave, or do I have to haul you kicking and screaming past your whole crew?”_ _

__She continued to glare, but he had her and she knew it. To haul her through the mess would definitely get more attention than the few that were in the cargo bay and would possibly undermine her authority with quite a few of them._ _

__“That’s blackmail.” She crossed her arms, but seeing her reluctant acceptance, he huffed and straightened, offering a hand to pull her up. For a second it seemed as if she would refuse, but rolling her eyes, she grasped the offered support and was pulled to her feet._ _

__“I hate you.”_ _

__Garrus huffed a laugh as the doors slid open and he steered her through the mess hall and med bay, much to Chakwas amusement._ _

__“Finally got her, Garrus?” Chakwas held back laughter at the sight of their small human Commander’s indignant expression. “I was wondering how long it would take. She’s been avoiding me.”_ _

__“Hmmph” He chuffed, tapping the signal for Liara’s door to announce he was there. “She may be able to avoid some of us, but she wasn’t trying to avoid me.”_ _

__“Good.”_ _

__The door whooshed open softly, Liara turning to greet him only to squeak and flinch away from the enraged human. Garrus waved a hand at her._ _

__“Calm down, she’s mad at me, not you.”_ _

__“Oh,” She turned her furious gaze on the asari “I’m mad at you too, but more so at him right now. What are you going to do now, huh Garrus?”_ _

__He smiled down at her._ _

__“Well, first, I’m going to take your weapon so you don’t do something ridiculous.”_ _

__“I’m not armed you idiot.”_ _

__He snorted, looking skyward before throwing a significant glance towards her boot._ _

__“ARGH, FINE!” She ripped the knife sheath free to throw it at him. Garrus ducked with a sharp yelp as it sailed past him to clang in the depths of the med bay, making Chakwas yell at her from the other end._ _

__“Have a fun few hours, Shepard. I’ll let you out….eventually.” His smug face was suddenly blocked by a slamming door, switch turning red as he locked it, knowing full well that he was better with electronics than her._ _

__“Why that sneaky little, meddling, annoying, jerk face of spiky ARGH!” She snarled at the door as she stomped in anger, but froze when she heard a muffled snort behind her. Turning her head to glare at the asari, Liara tried to hide her smile behind a hand, before dissolving into laughter. Shepard tried to keep up her anger, she really did, but it was impossible in the face of the young asari’s mirth. She slowly smiled, beginning to giggle as she slid down along the wall to sit on the floor._ _

__“You should have seen your face!” Liara was almost rolling in laughter, clutching her stomach as they laughed at the strange occurrence they’d found themselves in._ _

__“Probably no worse than yours. You looked like you’d just seen your worst nightmare.” Shepard felt some of her worry and stress run out of her as she laughed with this strange person._ _

__“I thought I had! Something about shooting me and throwing me from the airlock, if I recall correctly.” Shepard cocked her head, laughter fading to a slight frown as Liara tensed, ready to dart back if she’d said the wrong thing._ _

__“T’soni…I wouldn’t do that to you. That was if you went digging around to find something for bad purposes, or tried to mess with my mind in some way, even then it would have had to be pretty awful for me to actually shoot you, but what happened wasn’t your fault. I was more worried about how it would affect YOU.” Shepard was honestly confused. Had Liara been that terrified of her the whole time and she hadn’t noticed? She’d been so buried under her own worries and fears that she’d completely missed the fears of another. Liara looked down at her hands in her lap, considering._ _

__“Well, you were very convincing and it was probably partially my fault. I should have realized as soon as I entered your mind that it might be more difficult than I expected.” Seeing her bewildered expression, Liara explained. “Commander, I told you, that form of disconnect is usually with great trauma. People with that sort of trauma have a hard time disengaging from memories and with me so tired,” She shrugged. “I couldn’t help as well as I might have if I’d been in better shape….If I was able to at all.” Shepard nodded as she understood._ _

__“Yup, flashbacks stink. One of the many awesome, wonderful gifts that he left me with” Shepard considered for a moment before continuing, but the question had been on her mind since she woke in Med Bay. “T’soni…how much of what we saw did you really catch? Not all of it may have made much sense and I don’t know how ripping the connection free affected you, but it sure screwed me up for a while.”_ _

__Liara considered for a moment, starting to flip through some of what she’d seen to search for any obvious gaps, but stopped with a shuddering breath as she released them again. _So much pain_._ _

__“Don’t.” Shepard moved closer, laying a hand on her shoulder to pull her away from the last of the memories. “It’s alright. Don’t relive what you saw. Once would be enough.” Liara watched her for a moment, eyes sad, before answering._ _

__“But you still relive it, don’t you?” Shepard winced at her soft, hesitant question._ _

__“Yes. Not usually as often as I used to, but yes. Those moments are always there, waiting for me to trip over them in the dark, more so now than usual.”_ _

__“But….I’ve seen YOU!” Shepard cocked her head in confusion at the statement, but Liara continued without asking. “I’ve seen the shape of your mind, your SOUL. Such experiences can often leave people…twisted, malformed on the inside, but it, she, YOU are strong, beautiful, and your mind holds incredible wonder, peace, and light….HOW?!” Liara started to tear up as she held up the small, terrified child and her horrible life with the great creature she’d seen in the mind of the woman before her. Shepard chuckled, surprising her._ _

__“I’ve had a lot of help. I had a man who stepped up and made sure I got the help I needed, made sure I was given the tools to make my past work FOR me and not against me. Maybe you’ll meet him someday. He’s my father in practically every way that matters by now.” Seeing her incredulous expression, Shepard shook her head. “Don’t get me wrong, I am by no means, nor will I ever be….hmmm… normal, but I accept that as part of me too. I have flashbacks as bad moments, panic attacks around males or crowds, anywhere that someone is too close, nightmares sometimes, but I can take my past as part of what makes me who I am today.” Shepard thought for a minute, before meeting her wondering eyes as a grin stretched across her face. “And, you know, most days I don’t think I would change it even if I could. It’s part of me now. I don’t know who I would be without it, but I wouldn’t be me.”_ _

__Liara shook her head in amazement. To not even wish to change her past, to accept it so fully, was something she may never be able to comprehend, but she could accept it_ _

__“Very well, Commander.”_ _

__Shepard held out her hand, which Liara grasped gently, and winked._ _

__“I think we can dispense with that Commander stuff. You’ve dug around in my head and know some of my past more clearly than any but myself. Just call me Shepard, Doctor T’soni.”_ _

__“Only if you call me Liara. So, does this make us allies then?” She smiled at this small commander with such greatness hidden inside._ _

__“For now I think that could be said, but I hope we can eventually consider ourselves friends” Shepard didn’t think she could remember a time when she’d had so many around her that she would call that, but it felt right. Liara nodded. Shepard considered for a moment, a worried expression resurfacing._ _

__“Um, I would ask though…these memories aren’t something I share with many. Counting you, I could probably count on one hand the people I’ve trusted with it. So, maybe don’t mention it to anybody.”_ _

__“It’s not mine, Shepard! Of course I wouldn’t share it!” To share something so personal! But Shepard smiled, quite pleased with the shocked and horrified look on Liara’s face at the very thought, the fear of her story traveling to others dissipating in her mind._ _

__“Some people aren’t as good as you, Liara.” She glanced back towards the door’s glaring red icon. “How long do you think he’ll leave us here anyway?”_ _

__“Who knows? He’ll be back, though.” Liara gave her a sly look. “I think he likes you.”_ _

__“Of course he does, I’m his friend.”_ _

__“No, Shepard.”Liara rolled her eyes at the suddenly dense female “Likes you, likes you.”_ _

__“What…?” Shepard paused before understanding dawned. She snorted at the very idea “What are you, like twelve or something? Besides, he’s a turian, Liara. He couldn’t like me. I mean, look at me” She gestured to herself. “I’m half his height, all soft and squishy, no plates or markings or mandibles…”_ _

__“And I’m asari, what difference does it make? I’m just saying that was a brave thing he did, to stand up to his commander like that. As far as I can see, there was no gain…other than helping someone he cares about.” And she was beginning to see that this small human commander may have a slight crush on him too. _Though,_ Liara rolled her eyes mentally, _who knows how long before she’ll realize.__ _

__“Yeah…as a friend.”_ _

__Liara shrugged, letting it drop for now._ _

__“He’ll be back.” Shepard leaned back against the wall by the door, glaring at the glowing icon. _And when he is, I’ll kill him.__ _

__……_ _

__After a while, Shepard started introducing Liara to different human games to pass the time as they talked. She tried chess and, although Liara might enjoy such a game at another time, it quickly became apparent that Shepard was not the right teacher._ _

__“Eh…I stink at this anyway. How about something else?” She scrolled through her omnitool, pulling up card games to try instead, but froze when she heard footsteps immediately outside the door._ _

__Shushing Liara, she shifted back against the wall in a crouch. She’d found in her life that most people didn’t think to look down for an adult, so staying low usually gave her a couple extra seconds before discovery. The door pinged as it unlocked, opening with a hiss to reveal just the turian she was waiting for. Garrus stepped cautiously into the room, eyes flicking to Liara before looking around in confusion._ _

__Just before he would look behind him and spot her on the floor, Shepard’s leg lashed out, catching his hock and knocking the leg out from under him to send him crashing to the floor with a yelp. The fall stunned him briefly as his chin cracked against the floor, just long enough for what she needed. Leaping forward, she jumped on the back of the raised cowl of his armor, making it harder for him to recover as she grabbed his fringe and pressed it to the floor. He hissed, beginning to push himself up as she realized she may have misjudged this, but darn if she was going to give up already. His hard fringe points were dry and rough under her tight fingers as she gave a twist, turning his head to a very uncomfortable angle and leaning into it as he tried to push upwards. Garrus froze with a slight whimper as the hold strained his neck slightly, not yet injuring him but WAY too close for comfort. Shepard let up slightly, but didn’t release him, forcing him to stay still or risk possible injury. He didn’t give in quite so easily of course. Staring at her sideways, he reached up to grab her hands from his fringe. She growled, kicking the arm and trapping it with a foot as she once again twisted her hold on him to press his head to the floor._ _

__“I’d give in if I were you.” She could just see Liara’s shocked expression from the corner of her eye as she growled into Garrus’s ear. He stopped struggling, one crystal eye on her face from where he was pinned. She knew he could probably get out of this easily if it had been serious, but was glad when he instead trusted her and relaxed to the floor._ _

__“I probably deserve that, don’t I?” He chuckled slightly under her as his one free mandible slowly widened in a slight smile._ _

__“Darn straight! Don’t EVER do the again…..”She wrenched his fringe one last time before dropping her grim expression, allowing a smile in its place as she released him, but didn’t yet get up from his back._ _

__Relaxing his neck into a more natural angle, he glanced up at her curiously, not yet attempting to get up. Curiosity got the best of her for a moment as she looked down at him. _His plates have such an interesting texture, but surely…_ Garrus tensed as she reached towards his head, obviously expecting her to grab his fringe again, but instead she ran her fingers over his skin, curious if it was as rough as it looked._ _

__“Uh….Shepard?” His hesitant question sounded slightly nervous, but as she traced his neck plates with her fingers, he stuttered to a stop. With a slight shiver, he relaxed into the touch, a loud rumble rolling from his chest as she rubbed over his skin. She paused, surprised at the vibration rolling through his carapace and even into her chest. It was so loud!_ _

__“You’re so soft! And you sound like a giant cat.” She laughed as he arched his neck slightly into her hand where it had paused in her surprise, soft skin incredibly warm under her fingers. It was definitely leathery, but softer and more supple than any leather she’d ever felt ._ _

__“I don’t know why, but…feel free to keep doing that for the next couple hundred years.”His eyes slid closed in bliss as she rubbed more firmly around his plates._ _

__Hearing a giggle on the other end of the room, both stiffened and looked up, remembering their audience. Liara was covering her mouth, eyes twinkling in smothered mirth as she watched them awkwardly sit up, Shepard sliding from his back to the floor as he shook his head to clear it._ _

__“That was adorable.” She giggled again, voice muffled behind her hands. Shepard tried to glare at her, but it was pretty funny. She cracked a smile as she saw a little blue tinge on Garrus’s neck as he awkwardly unfolded himself from the floor and offered a hand up. Sliding her fingers into his, he pulled her to her feet and cleared his throat awkwardly. Ignoring his discomfort and the giggly asari behind them, Shepard pulled him down and wrapped her arms around his neck._ _

__“Thank you, Garrus.” She whispered before pulling away. The blue flush was stronger on his neck and jaw, but he fluttered his mandibles in an awkward smile._ _

__“Anytime.”_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again got caught up in a million projects. It's always something, but I'm back....for now anyway. Last chapter was a bit trippy, but hey *shrugs* so is my brain, but now we're back to less weird stuff.
> 
> As always....COMMENT! I NEED COMMENTS! What works? What doesn't? I'm still new at the whole writing thing, so any comment is HUGELY appreciated. Have fun and see you next time 🤗


	16. All You Need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As much as she teases him, one person on her crew is absolutely essential, but his absence among the crew during down time goes constantly unnoticed. 
> 
> Shepard is determined to change that.

A multitude of stars glowed over the horizon, pinpricks of distant light piercing that velvet veil of emptiness stretching for eternity. Color danced across them, the only thing breaking the view of those far lights as the ribbons swayed and spun elegantly across the nose of the Normandy.

Shepard leaned against the entrance to the bridge, pulling on the bill of her cap as she marveled once more at the wonders of space travel. The view planetside wouldn’t have been even half as clear with the atmosphere in the way. The aurora as the Normandy discharged over the unseen gas giant was just the icing on the cake as colors too vibrant to possibly seem real rippled across her ship, caught in the magnetic field of the planet below, a barely visible glowing crescent even on the night side. She could never see how anyone could take such a view for granted. It was too amazing to let just pass without pausing in wonder at how incredible the universe is.

“You just going to stand there all day?”

Joker hadn’t even looked up, but of course he already knew she was there.

“Yup, if I stand here long enough, I might catch you actually working.” She stepped behind his chair to look down on him, gently thumping his bare head.

“Hey! I work!” She raised a brow in amusement at the defensive tone as he waved to the board of displays. “Sometimes I even have to hit a button. It’s very exhausting!”

“Uh huh.” She snorted, ruffling his hair before jumping in the copilot’s seat, legs swung over the arm as its supports squeaked under the sudden change. “How’s the discharge going?” Joker checked his instruments.

“Roughly another hour, give or take, to be safe. It can be rushed, but it isn’t a good idea. Why, gotta hot date?”

“With DESTINY!” She wielded her fist dramatically to the stars as he snorted. “No, seriously though, I was just curious.”

They watched the dancing, twirling display of light for a few moments in silence, the sun just starting to crest the horizon in denial of their afternoon ship time.

“Do you ever get tired of it?” Surely she wasn’t the only one to see so much beauty in the universe.

“What, your constant badgering? Yeah.” She pushed a foot out, nudging his arm.

“No, seriously, do you ever get tired of what you see up here?” 

Joker paused for a minute, seeming to ignore the question as they watched the glowing ribbons twist and spiral against the dark.

“No…I don’t.”

She leaned back against the cool metal, that small line between her and the great emptiness, and folded her hands across her stomach, sighing as she watched, just enjoying a few minutes of peace. The rest of the team was probably relaxing in the mess. At times like this, there was little that anybody could do as the ship and planet worked together to scrub electrostatic build up with little intervention from humans needed at all, other than to bring them together. _Hmmmmm….together…._

“Hey Joker?” His head dropped forward with a groan before he looked up at her.

“Yeah, Commander?”

“How come you’re always up here?” He blinked, not catching her point immediately. “I mean, you need to EAT, occasionally sleep, but you never come down to the mess with the rest of us. I’m pretty sure you don’t sleep in that chair, but I never see you down near the pods either.” She caught a flash of disappointment, quickly buried as, to her surprise, his mouth twisted in a disgusted sneer.

“Oh yeah.” The disgust in his voice rang clear, confusing her further. “Took you long enough, Shepard.” At her obvious bafflement, he snorted derisively. “Well, most of my senior officers brought it up way sooner, but you sure took your time. Going to question my ability to do my job next? Maybe put in a transfer request for a more ‘able’ pilot.” She could practically HEAR the air quotes around that word. _Ah…_ Shepard sat up, cocking her head to stare at his hands on the console in a show of confusion, even opening her omnitool and going through reports for a moment before flicking it closed again.

“Seem pretty able to me.” The look on his face was priceless. 

“Wait…you don’t know.” He dropped his face into his hand as she studied him. “Shit.”

“If you’re talking about your condition,” His head jerked up to stare at her, but she laughed. “Of course I knew, goof. I have to know who I’m dealing with in the crew; strengths, weaknesses, where I need to shore someone up or leave them some slack. Yours is a pretty big weakness that I needed to be aware of, but why the heck would I ask for a replacement?” When he just stared wide eyed, she continued. “So you can’t do crazy acrobatics or use a missile launcher, big whoop. You CAN make my ship do crazy acrobatics and shoot stuff…..which is what matters. Not only that, but you’re the best there is, glass bones or not. Heck Joker, you got EVERY trainer in flight school to admit it, which means you probably made that qualification several times over!” 

“And you better believe it!” _Aaaand he’s back._ Still, after a moment his cocky grin slid off again. “So, wait, the teasing, the hat stealing, all of that?”

“You didn’t seem to want to be treated differently and I saw no reason to do so. So, I rib you just as much as any other crew member. Plus, you give such wonderful reactions and.” Shepard grinned, flipping the said hat up. “I really do like this hat.” He groaned dramatically, but his smile ruined it as they went back to watching the sun crest the giant’s horizon, bands of copper and gold spreading across its upper atmosphere, like ink in water.

“Seriously though, why don’t you come join us in the mess? I’m sure the Normandy can handle itself in orbit for a bit.”

Joker sighed, reaching under his console and pulling out a crutch. 

“I’m surrounded by tough marines, even a krogan, but I have to get around with these just to avoid breaking a leg. I prefer to avoid embarrassment when possible…and, you know, accidental death by clumsy krogan.”

She looked at the crutch in his hand, considering for a moment. Meeting his eye, she told him the truth.

“Joker….no matter what you have to use to get around, any side effect of your condition should not be an embarrassment. In my mind, you are probably the bravest person on this ship.” He scoffed, going to slide it back, but she continued. “Look at me, I’m small, but get around just fine. Unless I get shot, I don’t have to worry about anything more than a bruise because I ran into something while distracted...again.” She rolled her eyes at his chuckle. “Wrex? Even if he IS shot, he only has to worry about it for a minute and then he heals just fine. But you? You could probably break a bone SNEEZING, but did you choose some cushy sit down job where you never have to worry? Did you decide to work from home, so you don’t even have to leave at all if you choose?! NO! You chose to fly, and not just to fly, but to fly WARSHIPS! That takes guts man!” At this point, Joker was openly gaping at her in shock, but she stood, moved to reach past him and pull out the crutch he’d revealed and its partner, holding them out to him. “So, show a little more and come down to the mess for a bit. I can practically guarantee that anyone who matters is not going to laugh at the coolest pilot in the galaxy.”

She grinned as he rolled his eyes, tapped a few commands, and eased himself up to grab the crutches, bending over them slightly as he braced against them to head down the CIC. A couple of techs glanced up as they slowly made their way through, one ever giving a surprised half wave, but not a single snicker was to be heard. As he limped next to her, she took a moment to really look at him. He probably would have been a good bit taller than her, but the deformities that his disease caused in his legs and his perpetual slouch brought him closer to her level. Though, she was actually surprised how straight he held himself as she always figured crutches would cause a hunched posture. Apparently not. 

His smooth rolling gait with them only hesitated when he reached the steps toward the mess. Shepard watched as he lowered them down, following after with practiced ease that slowed only slightly as they worked their way down. She honestly didn’t think she could have been so quick on the awkward looking things, but he handled it with an economy of motion that spoke to long use. 

“You don’t have to wait for me you know.” His words caused her to glance up from her examinations to see him wryly watching her as he paused on the steps.

“Oh, I just figured I could make sure my pilot doesn’t bust his butt on those clumsy things.”

“I thought that was your job, Miss Runs-Into-Random-Objects.” _Of course he would hold onto that bit of information about my easily distracted self._

“HEY! That’s COMMANDER Runs-Into-Random-Objects to you!”

“Yes, Ma’am!” Joker managed to come to attention, seamlessly slipping his arm free of the loop and throwing a sarcastic salute without even letting the crutch slip, much to her impressed amusement. She returned it just as sarcastically before waving for him to go on, which he did with much exaggerated eye rolling.

Their entry into the mess was greeted with a mass greeting. She always thought it funny how easy it was to tell those who were actually getting to know her from those who were too uptight or stuck in their hero worship to bother. A simple nod from Garrus and Wrex, “Shepard”, versus the more disciplined _And somewhat irritating_ “Commander” that she received from Ash and Kaiden along with a few other techs in the hall. She much preferred her name or the energetic wave from Tali than a title unless there was something official going on. Seeing two seats free by the dextros, she plopped down as Joker joined her, hooking his crutches over the table after he was seated. A deep rumble had him obviously eyeing Wrex across the table before the giant’s face cracked into a wide grin. 

“Finally got the little pyjak down, Shepard?”

Garrus huffed under his breath, grinning that turian smile of his. “I was starting to suspect he was actually physically attached to it.”

“Hey, I believe you’re the one always fringe deep in ‘calibrations’, Garrus.” Shepard smiled, nudging him with an elbow to the waist, making his subharmonics chirp as he leaned away. _Weird. Is he ticklish or something?_

“One time! I said that one time!” 

Wrex gave a deep laugh as he watched the group of them joke.

“You’re one to laugh, Wrex.” Shepard jabbed a finger at him, but couldn’t reach him across the table, much to her annoyance as Garrus flicked a grin at her expense. “I’m surprised you haven’t grown roots in that spot in the cargo bay by now.”

“Hard work, Shepard.” His mouth still quirked up at one end though, defying the irritated tone.

“I’m sure he moves, Shepard….Just not when anybody is watching as it would ruin his image of easy intimidation that he’s going for.” He swung his great head toward Tali, pupils narrowing as his lips raised on a deep growl. She raised her hands in surrender. “Ooooor maybe not.”

They all laughed, enjoying the downtime together.

……

Shepard tossed Joker a ration bar from the mess as she came back to her seat a while later. They’d begun talking about their various jobs, but some of them were lost on her. Tali and Garrus seemed to be deep in some technical conversation, comparing different screens on their tools. A glance looked like computer code, but they might as well have been talking in ancient Greek and comparing Egyptian hieroglyphs for all she was able to get. Joker was little better, chatting with Kaiden about some kind of flying maneuver or another as he opened the bar. Wrex’s war stories were the part she understood best as he spoke of the dangers of Tuchanka. _Note to self, never EVER go to Tuchanka!_ Giant thresher maws, exploding fire breathing bugs the size of cars, varren, radiation, and lots and LOTS of very angry krogan were just the start. Right now he was in a discussion with Ash about the various weapons on board. She just sat back and watched it all, proud of how well so many different people and races were meshing together.

Garrus was comfortable enough to be out of armor and in regular civvies for once, quite a feat for him. Tali was opening up, less shy or prone to cower in on herself when faced with unexpected attention. Ash seemed to be getting along well with the other races on board, even apparently being friendly with their resident krogan, much to Shepard’s delighted surprise. Joker looked relaxed, even SMILING. _Shocker_. Kaiden? He glanced up at her, meeting her eyes briefly before giving a respectful nod and going back to his conversation with Joker. Okay, he hadn’t really changed much, but most everybody seemed to be coming into their own. Even Liara came out of hiding for a little while with Dr. Bryson, both of them sticking mostly to themselves as they watched the chaos for a bit, before some of the techs waved them over to a few empty seats.

Shepard sighed in pleasure as she relaxed into her seat, just letting the conversation flow around her.

As much as she loved those distant stars, the great lights over far horizons of unknown worlds just waiting to be found….sometimes she needed a different view, a chance to pause and wonder at the everyday marvel, a chance to see the extraordinary in everyday actions as she reminded herself what was possible, to see kindness and camaraderie that could build between individuals if they only gave it a chance.

It may seem small, but….

 

_Sometimes small is all we need._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who came back....
> 
> HI AGAIN! THANKS!
> 
> I know it's been a while, BUT I'M STILL ALIVE HAHAHAHA! 
> 
> As I've mentioned in the past, this is the first writing I've really ever attempted, so it's fly by the seat of my pants learning style. I was gone for a bit there as I took what I thought worked well and edited previous chapters to match. There haven't been massive, story altering changes, but changes in tone and descriptive language. Hopefully there won't be huge gaps in the future without warning, but I can't make promises.😁 Thanks for your patience with me and I hope you enjoy the changes. As always, advice helps me learn, which makes the story better, so....COMMENTS PLEASE!


End file.
